The Whales Strike Back

[kurohinge1]

Ship Ablaze and Crewman Missing as Whales Fight Back

The Japanese whaling ship Nisshin Maru, carrying up to 1,000 tonnes of heavy fuel oil, is drifting on fire in Antarctica after what appears to have been an attack by a terrorist group of whales. The group, calling itself "Whales of Mass Destruction" - or "WMD" - has claimed responsibility. The C.I.A. has been aware of, and trying to locate WMD since the late 1990's.

About 20 crew are fighting the fire on the ship and 140 have been evacuated to other vessels in the six ship fleet. One crewman remains missing.

According to evacuated seamen, the ship was boarded late last night by a pod of whales wearing ski masks. "I . . . not sure, because they wearing masks." said one crewmember. "Maybe Fin whale, but definitely foreign because they not speaking Japanese" he added.

Unconfirmed reports say that the ship's owner, the Japanese Government's Institute of Cetacean Research "ICR", has received a demand from the WMD for "the return of all whales abducted by the Japanese".

An unofficial source at the ICR revealed that they were taking the demand seriously and were putting together as many bento boxes as they could find, with the remains of whales recently "caught for scientific research".

No comment was available from Australian government officials about any assistance they might provide to the stricken ship, although most pubs should close for the night in a couple of hours and a reply can be expected shortly thereafter.

However, as the Ross Sea lies in New Zealand's search and rescue zone, the New Zealand Navy has confirmed that both it's ships have "weighed anchor and raised sail" and they hope they will be in the vicinity of Antarctica "in about 3 months or so, if the winds are favourable".

Real story here

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Whale Attacks

Records of whale attacks on whaling ships have been around since the 19th Century. While similar attacks may occur in modern whaling, the structural integrity of ships and enhanced sensor equipment mean that catastrophic attacks are less likely to occur.

In the winter of 1820, a Sperm Whale attacked the American whaling boat Essex in the South Pacific, holing and capsizing her 1. While many of the crew were able to get to safety, a number were never accounted for.

In March 1863 near Cape Cod, a whaling boat was struck by a whale sending a crewman overboard into the creature's open mouth. The sailor's legs got caught in between its teeth, and after the whale died from injuries sustained from exploding harpoons, he was rescued and revived.

Advice for Swallowees

Once inside, sit tight and try not to touch anything if at all possible. Gastric processes are invasive and skin does not recover well from encounters with digestive fluids. The process by which gastric acid handles food is slow and wearing clothing, especially of the synthetic variety, is likely to buy you some time.

Escape from the belly of a whale, aside from simple survival, may be far more difficult as the majority of whales - especially the Baleen whales that rely on sieving minuscule marine life forms for their diet - have complex digestive systems. They may have up to four stomach chambers, rather like the multi-stomach system of a cow, which allows a controlled channelling of foodstuffs through the digestive system. There is also the constant intake of seawater that results from their feeding processes. Unless someone is looking for you, or you have a very large cutting implement and a strong stomach, you may have to be satisfied with simply surviving until starvation takes you or good fortune saves the day.

If all else fails you might consider using pepper or a small fire to smoke your way out.

http://www.bbc.co.uk/dna/h2g2/brunel/A471548

[Taro Toporific]

Originally Posted by kurohinge1

Ship Ablaze and Crewman Missing as Whales Fight Back

Here's a better photo and an added detail of those demons of the deep!

Laser Whales Strike Back Against Japanese Whalers
<3yen news service

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