Communication Breakdown

[Mulboyne]

So there I was, in a bar with a German client who was great fun. Severe case of yellow fever - he used to have a Vietnamese girlfriend in Germany. It was his first time in Japan and he was already planning to go home via Vietnam. I judged that he could handle a few more places so began to do the rounds. He had no Japanese but we both played the dancing bear manzai team to great effect. "One more bar" I said. So we went.

It was great, everyone was drunk so I did my introductions: "He's German!". One girl behind the bar became very excited and explained how she liked Germany. She spoke some English but asked me to help. It went something like this:

Bar Girl: "Mulboyne...please translate "

Me: "Sure...No problem...mo man tai...Ha! That's Chinese!...God, I'm so funny!

BG: "My favourite Germany is number three"

Me: "I like number three too! Three beers kudasai!"

BG: "No, not number three, I mean third. Third teikoku. Nan desu ka?"

Me: "Third Reich?"

BG: "Yes! Sugoi!"

German: "Did you just say Third Reich?"

Me: "Sorry, I was just translating, she probably just learnt the words in school. Oh look, that's your beer. Prost!"

BG: "Third Reich is my favourite. I know Auschwitz and Nazi! Yudayajin te nan desu ka?"

Me: "Ha Ha! Sumimasen, toire wa doko desu ka?"

Under no circumstances should I have left that conversation when she had just asked me what "Jewish" was in English but I thought popping to the toilet might help change the subject. The next question when I came out was:

BG: "Daigyakusatsu (holocaust) wa?"

Me: "I'm sorry I really don't know. Hey, why is everyone so drinking so slowly? Kampai!"

German: "She is talking about the war?"

Me: "No...she is just trying to remember her school days. She's just being friendly."

German: "Why do they teach about bad Germany in Japan when I hear they don't teach about bad Japan?"

Me: "No, you have to understand, she has heard you are German and she's just trying to think of something about Germany. She doesn't really know the meaning. Trust me."

BG: "Third Reich, ne. My band...We all have tattoo!"

(rolls up sleeve to show swastika)

Me: "Check please."


Twenty or thirty year years from now I'm sure I'll look back on this and laugh.

[amdg]

Not so much the 'Bad Germany', but the past Germany, and as we all know, "the past is a foreign country: they do things differently there."

[Greji]

:p
"the past is a foreign country: they do things differently there."

They do? Thank God Japan is Unique!

[FG Lurker]

Too bad the guy didn't have a shaved head... She would've gone psycho to have a "real skinhead" in her presence!

(One of my fav fucked Japanese comments: "Michael Jordan is a skinhead.")

[Kuang_Grade]

[Takechanpoo]

Germany is sensei of J-modernization.
So I respect Germany but hate it.

[GomiGirl]

Ouch!! A client of yours you say?

[omae mona]

"Don't mention the war!"

[GomiGirl]

"Don't mention the war!"

Exactly what I was thinking but I didn't have time to search for the image.

[Tsuru]

[...]

Me: "Check please."

That reminded me of some British comedy series with only Indians in it. Great stuff.

[6810]

That reminded me of some British comedy series with only Indians in it. Great stuff.

You would be referring to...
Goodness Gracious Me
UK, BBC, Sketch, colour, 1998
Starring: Sanjeev Bhaskar, Kulvinder Ghir, Meera Syal

Created for television, Asian sketch show Goodness Gracious Me appeared first on the radio. When producer Anil Gupta took the idea to BBC television the executive producer Jon Plowman suggested the team first assemble a radio pilot, a cheap way of demonstrating the potential of an untried idea. This pilot led to a full radio series, which quickly won a prestigious Sony Award. Impressed by its aural successes, Plowman decided the time was right to switch the show to television. (For details of the radio version, see footnote.)
The budget for the first series was minuscule by terrestrial TV standards but Anil Gupta spent cannily, providing at least one glossy, lavish-looking sketch in each show, and saving cash elsewhere by simplifying pieces that didn't call for elaboration. The style of the show was similar to that of The Fast Show, recurring characters providing vital continuity. These included Smeeta Smitten, Showbiz Kitten (Syal), a Bollywood gossip columnist][yt]KG-pmg_CCeI[/yt][/U]