decision about a job- please help

[pragmatic]

Hello everyone,

First I want to apologize for coming on here only when I need help. However, I am at a pivotal point here and I do not know what to do. Any constructive input would be appreciated.

I have been offered two jobs and I do not know which one to take. I have crunched numbers on a spreadsheet and I have worked out the pros and cons on a sheet of paper and I have still not reached a conclusion. My hope here is that you guys will look at my situation objectively and tell me what I should do. I completely understand that the final decision is mine to make. Here are the two jobs , their advantages and disadvantages

1. 1st job is in Yokohama and pays 270000 a month. It is a kindergarten.
pros-
-better pay
-bigger company

cons
-I have to move- I like where I live now
-My girlfriend does not want to live in Yokohama (she is NOT living with me now, but we plan to live together in the future- perhaps next year)
-I would lose my private students because I have to move (would no longer live near my friends either)

2. 2nd job is in Saitama- Pays 220000 to 230000- It is a nursery
-Pros
-My girlfriend wants to live in Saitama in the future
-I can commute there from where I live now (1 hour and 10 minutes)
-Can keep my private students

Cons-
-Lower Salary
-Smaller company

I am wondering if I am thinking about this whole thing the wrong way? I spoke with my girlfriend about this and she said either place is OK, but there are no jobs for her in Yokohama and she wants to live in Saitama. Am I basing too much on her? Am I basing too much on money? Am I too attached to where I live now (I have been living there for 5 years) Someone please tell me your honest and objective opinion. Thank you for taking the time to read this.

[matsuki]

Where in Saitama? That's what would be the deciding factor for me.

Yokohama is where I would prefer to live and jobs should be easier for you GF to find there but the cost of living is going to be higher.

[pragmatic]

It is in Koshigaya near Tokyo. However, she said she wants to live in Saitama. Am I putting too much on where she wants to go? Or am I putting too much on the money?

[yanpa]

How big is the gap betwen "220000 to 230000" + "income from private students", and "270000"?

You'll have moving costs and as Matsuki said, possibly higher living costs, which will narrow the gap.

How important is living in Yokohama for you?

[Taro Toporific]

1. 1st job is in Yokohama and pays 270000 a month. It is a kindergarten....
2. 2nd job is in Saitama- Pays 220000 to 230000- It is a nursery

Kindergarten VS nursery?

She-e-e-e-it! Diaper changing is the shits.

However, the nursery job might not require any unpaid paperwork and far fewer problems with parents---Both the bane of all teaching.

Like Matsuki, I would prefer Yokohama over Saitama and there are some super cheap places to live in Yokohama especially near Kawasaki.

...because I have to move (would no longer live near my friends either)

As an unpractical matter, I chose to live near my judo teacher and friends in Komagome, Tokyo for my first 15 years in Japan even through I had to commute 1.5 hours to my office in Totsuka, Yokohama/Kanagawa. It. Was. Worth. It.

[Grumpy Gramps]

Apart from the number crunching and the logical stuff and everything else that your brain wants, which surely is #1 to consider, what does your heart want? That's #2 to consider, and both need to be happy.

[pragmatic]

Thank you to everyone who are giving me advice. I will do my best to comment on our posts as well.

Am I putting too much thought for my girlfriend? As I putting too much thought toward money? I should note that I am 45 years old now. Whatever decision I make will affect me for the next 4 to 5 years most likely. Am I screwing myself by taking a lower paying job?? You can be perfectly honest.

[pragmatic]

Thank you for giving honest answers.

Am I screwing myself by taking a lower paying job?

Am I putting too much thought toward my girlfriend?

Am I putting too much though toward money?

Thank you again!

[Russell]

So, how much do you currently earn from your private students?

What is the potential to extend your income from private students, by for example increasing their number?

What is the potential to have private students in Yokohama?

[pragmatic]

At Russell

Thank you your response. I appreciate it. Your questions are perfectly valid.

To answer them, I have about 20000 per month in private students sometimes its more, sometimes its less depending on who shows up , etc. If I go to Yokohama I would have to give up all of my private students because I cannot commute to where I live now and continue teaching them. However I could probably get more. Then again, I my girlfriend told me that she does not want to live in Yokohama. She want to live in Saitama. However, I am wondering how much weight I should put on that. Am I screwing myself over by taking a lower paying job? Am I putting too much though toward my girlfriend?
Thank you again!

[Russell]

At Russell

Thank you your response. I appreciate it. Your questions are perfectly valid.

To answer them, I have about 20000 per month in private students sometimes its more, sometimes its less depending on who shows up , etc. If I go to Yokohama I would have to give up all of my private students because I cannot commute to where I live now and continue teaching them. However I could probably get more. Then again, I my girlfriend told me that she does not want to live in Yokohama. She want to live in Saitama. However, I am wondering how much weight I should put on that. Am I screwing myself over by taking a lower paying job? Am I putting too much though toward my girlfriend?
Thank you again!

Pragmatic, so with your added income from private teaching the difference is 20000 to 30000 Yen less when you stay in Saitama. You have to decide yourself whether that is worth it. It is about 10% income difference. But.

When you want to live together with your girlfriend, then her opinion is important. Also take into account that she will have income too when you stay in Saitama, and that living together saves money.

Another important factor is how the atmosphere compares in both work places. Where do you feel more at home and relaxed? Bigger company sounds good, but it often comes with lots of baggage. And how does the future outlooks in both companies compare?

Anyway, I wish you success with your choice. In any case, talk with your girlfriend!

[matsuki]

It is in Koshigaya near Tokyo. However, she said she wants to live in Saitama. Am I putting too much on where she wants to go? Or am I putting too much on the money?

As someone currently in that very neighborhood, my 2 cents:
I was sick of paying more for less space, shitty old buildings with separate parking, and no pet/gaijin landlords in Tokyo. Commute to my office in Tokyo is still less than an hour by car from here. I'm able to pay rent for my new, large, insulated, modern townhouse by credit card. Local shopping is cheap and convenient plus IKEA and Costco (w/ gas station) are nearby. Loving it for my current situation.

As to the GF, I wouldn't place any emphasis on her until you two are serious. Anything up til then and you may regret shaping your life around her wishes. That being said, if you have a good network of friends in the area, it might be worth sticking the area.

[Mike Oxlong]

Whoa! Like double-pane windows in proper frames and everything?

[matsuki]

Whoa! Like double-pane windows in proper frames and everything?

Yes, even the walls have insulation. I had to route exhaust from some of my work equipment outside...wall fan was the perfect diameter so I just removed it and routed through there. While doing so, I was amazed to find insulation and modern building practices being followed. Pet's/Gaijin allowed, insulated, modern building with no bullshit tatami and preexisting AC units, rent paid by CC...via smartphone app. Apparently 2019 missed Tokyo and landed in Saitama. The locals that have seen it have all been impressed but I have been a bit surprised by snarky comments from people overpaying to slum it up in Tokyo about how "there was nothing there at all years ago." Livin in the past to feel good about now? Must be part of the Samurai code of Abenomics. Anyhow, the "fuck, that's far from Tokyo" responses are even more silly when I can drive downtown from there in 30-40mins, and train it there in less than an hour.

[pragmatic]

I guess the real question now remains. Do I take a job that I like or the one for the money?

[wagyl]

Let me rephrase your question for you:
Do I sell my happiness for Yen, or do I live on an adequate income to survive and still remain happy?

The further rephrasing is:
Am I a prostitute, selling my soul for a few extra Yen?

The other way of looking at it:
Do I choose to spend almost one third of my life (including sleeping time) at a place I don't want to be, or at a place I do want to be?

[wangta]

Hello everyone,

First I want to apologize for coming on here only when I need help. However, I am at a pivotal point here and I do not know what to do. Any constructive input would be appreciated.

I have been offered two jobs and I do not know which one to take. I have crunched numbers on a spreadsheet and I have worked out the pros and cons on a sheet of paper and I have still not reached a conclusion. My hope here is that you guys will look at my situation objectively and tell me what I should do. I completely understand that the final decision is mine to make. Here are the two jobs , their advantages and disadvantages

1. 1st job is in Yokohama and pays 270000 a month. It is a kindergarten.
pros-
-better pay
-bigger company

cons
-I have to move- I like where I live now
-My girlfriend does not want to live in Yokohama (she is NOT living with me now, but we plan to live together in the future- perhaps next year)
-I would lose my private students because I have to move (would no longer live near my friends either)

2. 2nd job is in Saitama- Pays 220000 to 230000- It is a nursery
-Pros
-My girlfriend wants to live in Saitama in the future
-I can commute there from where I live now (1 hour and 10 minutes)
-Can keep my private students

Cons-
-Lower Salary
-Smaller company

I am wondering if I am thinking about this whole thing the wrong way? I spoke with my girlfriend about this and she said either place is OK, but there are no jobs for her in Yokohama and she wants to live in Saitama. Am I basing too much on her? Am I basing too much on money? Am I too attached to where I live now (I have been living there for 5 years) Someone please tell me your honest and objective opinion. Thank you for taking the time to read this.

Nothing wrong with coming on here to ask advice - FG's good with that even tho a few posters might take the piss at times and pretend to give it...........Yep, I think you're thinking about this the wrong way.

For starters, let your girlfriend live in boring, increasingly hotter than Tokyo/Kanagawa Saitama. Do you really have to live with her? Living with a partner often kills romance and unlike marriage there's no motivation to put in effort to make it work cause you've both committed yourselves.

Don't be a tightwad about rent, sometimes paying more rent means paying for better access to jobs, social life, getting better ops in general. Fuck, I live in Adachi Ku and it's better than living in Saitama, closer to Tokyo, etc. Live by yourself in Kanagawa, much better place than boringarse Saitama.

As for the nursery school at the cheapskate salary - come on mate, that is one of the shittiest literally and otherwise jobs a gaijin can do in Japan, anywhere, especially in boringarse Saitama.

Kindergarten still has the basic problem of working with children who compared to about a decade ago have become spoiled, insolent and without the slightest resilience thanks to arseholes of mothers who insist that its their children's right to behave like shitheads and anybody who disagrees is almost criminal. Previous generations of J mums at least had a strong number of them who were ashamed when their children acted like shitheads, now it's everybody else' fault.

But it's a no brainer - 270,000 yen per week looks fantastic - and it aint - compared to the garbage pay now that's common for Engrish teachers thanks to all the broke snowflakes from Northern America who come here cause their lowered academic standards and degrees won't get them a job or they think their undeserved degree is way above working an honest job.

Move to Yokohama right now and accept that job if you haven't already.

[wangta]

Oh yeah and you'll be able to get private students again - both in Kanagawa and Tokyo. It's bloody easy to get to Tokyo from Yokohama etc in Kanagawa.