Steven Seagal? Who's that?

[Taro Toporific]

Via Fark and Boston.com

"In the late 80s and early 90s, Steven Seagal was above the law, marked for death, hard to kill, and out for justice....So giving advice to stay clear of a music career could be tough... keep a straight face while looking at this album cover."
REAL Audio: "Better man" by Steven Seagal
More Clips via Amazon.com

[tomasurii]

Fuck, I'm having flashbacks of Ahhnold running for governor. But after listening to the clips, I'm fairly certain that the one who's Hard to Kill will not stage a terminator-type coup.

[amdg]

His one redeeming feature - he speaks perfect Osaka-ben (I haven't heard him speak it myself, but according to my GF its true!)

[Andocrates]

Not since Micky Rouke has an actor been so full of himself. I liked his Zen days best of all, it was so campy.

[amdg]

hey Andocrates, who you callin' 'campy'?! muthaf...



His funniest movie title - "Fire Down Below" aka, "stay away from the vindaloo chicken curry"

[Samurai_Jerk]

I'm not surprised considering he did such a useless pussy-ass martial art.

[maraboutslim]

Aikdio is useless and pussy-ass? I see you've learned nothing from Japan. Give it time and maybe it'll come to you.

[dimwit]

[tatsujin]

Hi guys,

Seagal doesn't hold a candle to Hasselhoff - a veritable God in Germany, a lifeguard by day, crime fighter by night, cringy warbler in his spare time. Just don't make him angry -



Did you know he is the top selling artist of all time in germany? If you feel like absorbing some of that patented Hasselhoff magic then stare at the following picture...

[Andocrates]

Hi guys,

Seagal doesn't hold a candle to Hasselhoff - a veritable God in Germany, a lifeguard by day, crime fighter by night, cringy warbler in his spare time. Just don't make him angry -


Did you know he is the top selling artist of all time in germany? If you feel like absorbing some of that patented Hasselhoff magic then stare at the following picture...

OK, I feel totally gay now.

[Samurai_Jerk]

OK, I feel totally gay now.

Then you're ready for aikido.

[Steve Bildermann]

Seagal doesn't hold a candle to Hasselhoff

Doncha mean Hassle the Hoff

http://www.ananova.com/entertainment/story/sm_961345.html?menu

Ice-T is to produce David Hasselhoff's first hip-hop album.

Ice-T added: "He's gonna come out as Hassle The Hoff - I promise you. The Hoff will surprise people with his rap skills and humour."

[maraboutslim]

OK, I feel totally gay now.

Then you're ready for aikido.

Tell that to Chiyonofuji...

[dingosatemybaby]

Via Fark and Boston.com

"In the late 80s and early 90s, Steven Seagal was above the law, marked for death, hard to kill, and out for justice....So giving advice to stay clear of a music career could be tough... keep a straight face while looking at this album cover."
REAL Audio: "Better man" by Steven Seagal
More Clips via Amazon.com

THUG IN POOLHALL: This guy ain't nothin'! He's nothin' without that badge and that guitar!
STEVEN "SLASH" SEAGAL: Is that right? (puts down badge, guitar; takes out harmonica) Who's first? I call this little ditty, "The Anticipation of Death is Worse Than Death Itself." It's a four/four blues in C major; see if you can follow along, or I'll start throwing pool-balls at your windpipes

[amdg]

STEVEN "SLASH" SEAGAL: Is that right? (puts down badge, guitar; takes out harmonica) Who's first? I call this little ditty, "The Anticipation of Death is Worse Than Death Itself." It's a four/four blues in C major

[tonikoro]

His one redeeming feature - he speaks perfect Osaka-ben (I haven't heard him speak it myself, but according to my GF its true!)

It freaked me out too, but I came home one night, and he was on one of Sanma's variety shows. He speaks Japanese quite well for all his action cheese. The way I heard it, I guess he as an ex-wife and a daughter here. The ex-wife as I heard it is something of a well known aikido teacher, or something like that.

[yellowlightman]

His one redeeming feature - he speaks perfect Osaka-ben (I haven't heard him speak it myself, but according to my GF its true!)

It freaked me out too, but I came home one night, and he was on one of Sanma's variety shows. He speaks Japanese quite well for all his action cheese. The way I heard it, I guess he as an ex-wife and a daughter here. The ex-wife as I heard it is something of a well known aikido teacher, or something like that.

What I've heard is that he learned his aikido from his ex-wife's father. Seagal and his ex-wife had apparently been saving up money so they could move to Los Angeles and Seagal could start his movie career, but he apparently took and the money and left without her, more or less leaving her behind.

I worked for a guy a couple years ago who had done aikido for about 10 years, and I had a major chip on his shoulder about Seagal.

[Taro Toporific]

[
What I've heard is that he learned his aikido from his ex-wife's father. Seagal and his ex-wife had apparently been saving up money so they could move to Los Angeles and Seagal could start his movie career, but he apparently took and the money and left without her, more or less leaving her behind.....
...I worked for a guy a couple years ago who had done aikido for about 10 years, and I had a major chip on his shoulder about Seagal.

Seagal-tulkuaka The Action Lama and "sacred vessal," has got a lot of chipper fans here on the FG Forum too, hee, hee.

Yes, that is the one.

Facts & Figures: Everything You Need to Know About Steven Seagal
.....When he wed Adrienne La Russa in 1984, Seagal was still married to Miyako Fujitani, who was living in Japan. According to the book she wrote, Seagal's last words to his first wife, the daughter of an aikido master, were: "You are crazy]Info from previous FG threads...[/i]

http://www.japantoday.com/e/?content=news&cat=8&id=246389

Back in the thread Steven Seagal Joins The Yakuza, circa Nov. 30, 2003, I totally forgot about bad-mouthing Seagal about his Japanese ex-wife and kids.

Speaking of waruguchi/badmouthing the Seagals'...
Check out the famous Seagal movie, BLEEP BROTHERS most noted for the word "c**t" uttered dozens and dozens of times stars Kentaro Seagal the younger Bleep Brother, Tatsuo. The brothers form a duo, hoping to become the leading manzai comedy act in Japan...

We've discussed Steven and his wacky world of make-believe before..

http://www.fuckedgaijin.com/forums/showthread.php?t=1995&highlight=segal

http://www.fuckedgaijin.com/forums/showthread.php?t=2295&highlight=steven

Re: In case you are still keeping count[/quote]

Steven Seagal and the Mob
--- from the Courtroom Television Network
.....He claims to have been a student of the founder of aikido, Morihei Ueshiba, who is also known as O'Sensei. Ueshiba died in 1968, which means that Seagal had to have been a teenager, living alone in Japan, to have studied with the master. At least one of Ueshiba's students remembers Seagal being around at the time but doesn't recall Seagal being on the mat very much. He remembers Seagal as the kid who was always playing guitar.
Sometime in the early 1970s when Seagal was in his twenties, he married Miyako Fujitani whose father owned an aikido dojo in Osaka. Seagal eventually ran the dojo for his father-in-law, which substantiates Seagal's claim that he was the first Westerner to operate an aikido dojo in Japan. He also claims to have earned black belts in other martial arts during this period and "fought off" members of the Yakuza, Japan's version of the Mafia. According to Ned Zeman in Vanity Fair, Fujitani, whom Seagal left in 1980, doubts the veracity of this part of his bio.
Seagal returned to the United States and married Adrienne La Russa while he was still married to Fujitani.....

[Taro Toporific]

Via Fark

STEVEN SEAGAL's

LIGHTNING BOLT(tm) Energy Drink
The First of it's Kind

Lightning Bolt is an energy drink as unique as the man who created it. It has pioneered the way for nutrition

Steven Seagal now can add Energy Drink formulator to a list of talents that already includes veteran actor, singer/songwriter, guitarist, and Aikido black belt. Maintaining an unrelenting schedule that would tire younger entrepreneurs, the 54-year-old Seagal has just completed two movies, Into the Sun and Submerged. His album, Songs from the Crystal Cave, released earlier this year, has already hit the pop charts in Europe.

"When Steven Seagal travled to Asia searching for the ingredients for Lightning Bolt, he wanted a universal Asian character to summarize it's energy and power. The character known as "CHI" stands for power, and energy in many Asian languages and cultures.
The Name "LIGHTNING BOLT"

http://www.lightningdrink.com/

[Taro Toporific]

OK, I feel totally gay now.

TOKYO, JAPAN -Getty Images OCTOBER 22:Actor Steven Seagal performs during the abolition of nuclear weapons concert .... in Tokyo, Japan...supported by the Global Nuclear Disarmament Fund.

[Greji]

OK, I feel totally gay now.

TOKYO, JAPAN -Getty Images OCTOBER 22:Actor Steven Seagal performs during the abolition of nuclear weapons concert .... in Tokyo, Japan...supported by the Global Nuclear Disarmament Fund.

I suppose that concert does qualify him for the "Gay" no kai!

FWIW, as far as S. Seagull having a black belt in other martial arts that was previously posted, that is relatively easy to accomplish, with of course, a little effort. The black belt is worshiped by westerners, when in fact, the 1st degree of the black belt, simply means you have mastered the beginning techniques. It does not mean you are a "master" as a lot of people suppose. Judo is a good example. Almost all high school judo team members in Japan or Korea are black belts and also so are a lot of Junior high students. The major competition level for serious matches and events is usually from the 3rd, 4th and 5th degree black belt level. It is also relatively easy for a gaijin who has practiced for a while, to arrange a special test through the Judo's Kodokan for a bit of extra cash, and get his 1st degree black belt (providing he can walk and chew gum at the same time). It gets difficult after that.

[maraboutslim]

I can confirm Gboothe's analysis fits for Aikido in Japan as well - the martial art that Segal studied. If one is studying on a casual basis, say twice a week, it may take several years to reach Shodan - the first rank of black belt. In Aikido, you are then allowed to wear Hakama and may have some assistant duties (maybe teach children's classes or something). It is quite difficult to reach the upper levels however. My sensei was taking his 5-dan test while I was his student. His sensei was an old man of 7 or 8 dan level and his sensei was 10-dan Tohei-sensei who depeneding on which branch of Aikido one subscribes to is either a kook or the one who has stayed truest to O-sensei's (Ueshiba, the founder of Aikido) martial arts.

Outside of Japan however, it is more difficult to reach Shodan in most martial arts. But that just makes up for the fact that most non-Japanese need more time to actually "get it". I don't believe a U.S. shodan is any better at the art than a Japanese shodan (except maybe the ones who got that status just from belonging to their college club).

[Greji]

Outside of Japan however, it is more difficult to reach Shodan in most martial arts. But that just makes up for the fact that most non-Japanese need more time to actually "get it". I don't believe a U.S. shodan is any better at the art than a Japanese shodan (except maybe the ones who got that status just from belonging to their college club).

Maraboutslim is right on. Although I would add that in Judo the FG's who have obtained Shodan outside of Japan are usually able to wipe the map with the Japanese Shodans. The reason being as I said in my previous post, is that the FG teachers, sensei's if you will, make earning the black belt such a prestigious and time consuming process, that by the time an FG makes it, he or she has reached a pretty high level of competancy in the art (sometimes, it is also just to add more to the cost of lessons to make it).

When in fact, in Japan, it is simply a matter of learning the basic techniques, which is why the Japanese students obtain shodan at a much younger age. Shodan simply means you have learned the techniques to start serious study, or you have reached the first step, the sho-dan. It is not the mysterious "black belt master" so frequently bantered about in overseas media.

Unfortunately, this ends at Shodan! When the J-people get to the grade of Nidan, Sandan and above, you better be serious if you want to play with them in their sandbox.

I leaned this the hard way. I got more time in flying hours in the main hall of the Kodokan (where the higher ranking J-belt holders practice) in one year, than I had in total flying time in 23 years in the Air Force.

:P

[Taro Toporific]

[quote="dingosatemybaby"]...I call this little ditty, "The Anticipation of Death is Worse Than Death Itself." It's a four/four blues in C major]


Segal VS Tokyo Shock Boyz

[IkemenTommy]

That guy has got to be over 50 by now considering how he started "acting" in the 80's.

Still, could probably kick my ass with a single blow.

[Greji]

That guy has got to be over 50 by now considering how he started "acting" in the 80's. Still, could probably kick my ass with a single blow.

Just remember that when you start badmouthing us old farts!

Born
April 10, 1951
Lansing, Michigan, USA

[American Oyaji]

My dad has a saying.

Old age and treachery can overcome youth and skill

[Greji]

Old age and treachery can overcome youth and skill

That and a .357 seem to demand a significant amount of attention. If you are possessing a dog that barks here and bites over there, you will win a lot of arguments!

[American Oyaji]

Does a 120lb Akita count?

[maraboutslim]

On cable here in the USA this evening, they showed a new Seagal movie called Into the Sun (2005). It's set in Japan. Young upstart Yakuza join with Tongs to eliminate the older Yakuza (and others) and corner the Asian heroin market. Seagal is CIA with long history as martial arts teacher or something in Tokyo. Lots of Japanese dialog with English subtitles (basically accurate). Seagal's Japanese isn't too bad. At least he doesn't say "yaKOOZa" like the other actors.

Less Aikido, more gun and sword action in this one.