McDonalds Rip-Off. Brought to you by ... ?

[omae mona]

After I was deluged by keitai advertisements and flyers handed out at Shibuya station, curiosity got the better of me.

I started to notice signs saying "100m ahead" as I walked through Shibuya station. Exiting the station, I started to see men in fancy black suits holding placards advertising the grand opening, and waving pedestrians toward the new store around the corner.

Turning the corner myself, I saw many more of the men in suits hovering around the entrance. A bright red rectangle surrounded the gaping opening, and it was practically pitch black inside. Peering into the dim space, I could make out fancy leather lounge chairs and tables lined up in the entrance area. I would have thought this was the front door of the latest hot Tokyo nightclub, except for the big plastic letters above the red rectangle: "QUARTER POUNDER".



At the counter I confirmed what the flyers seemed to indicate: exactly two menu choices. Quarter Pounder with Cheese (500 yen) or Double Quarter Pounder with Cheese (600 yen) (both sets with fries and drink included)

There was an eerie familiarity to the place, though. As I watched the staff wearing slick black and grey uniforms, I noticed very faint vertical pinstripes that seemed like another restaurant's. My tray had drinks, fries, and hamburger in cardboard packages with the restaurant's hip coordinated design, all saying "Quarter Pounder". But the shape and material also felt like something I'd had in my hands before.

I settled down into one of the huge leather chairs, with my lunch date, Mrs. Omae Mona, across from me. Popping the fries and burger into my mouth, I was somewhat amazed at how close this new scrappy startup, with only two stores (Shibuya and Omotesando) had come to replicating the taste of its much larger American competitor.

In fact, I was very much impressed by the mettle this new company is showing. They have taken a huge gamble by renting super-prime real estate and selling 500-600 yen lunches. They have gone up against a giant by appropriating a trademarked term for their own restaurant's name. And they've obviously laid out a huge advertising budget. Their web site has their domain registered by Dentsu. Not an advertising company that messes with small accounts.

Who on earth do you think could be behind this new venture?

[IkemenTommy]

Wouldn't a Double Quarter Pounder (w/cheese) just be called a Half Pounder with Cheese?

[Neo-Rio]

Who on earth do you think could be behind this new venture?

The Chinese, who would be the only group of people on earth audacious enough to try this one.

.... oh, and don't eat the food. It's probably contaminated.

[omae mona]

It sounds like those clever Chinese have been very thorough in setting this up. People commenting in the 2ch thread point out a few interesting facts about the mystery stores:

• The former tenant of both store fronts is.. McDonalds
• Former McDonalds regulars report that the Quarter Pounder employees look awfully familiar.

[Gilligan]

Sounds to me like the successful marketing of a new product--new to this country anyway.

[IkemenTommy]

It sounds like those clever Chinese have been very thorough in setting this up.

Should we be expecting cats and dogs in these burgers?

If I had to wait 3 hours in line just to get food like they did when Crispy Creme opened, fuck that:

[Iraira]

MickyD's has gotta be behind this...they got as many lawyers as Dizneyland does, and they'd be going psycho-lawsuitish, if someone tried a ploy like this in any country which they own. Unless....Hugo Chavez is behind this. The real reason that he shut the McDonald's down in Venezuela was to steal the recipes and organize a take over of the world artery hardening fast food giant, starting in Japan....if I could just figure out how UFOs and anal probes fit into this, it would all makes perfect sense.

[omae mona]

Agreed, and I too am trying to figure out the UFO and anal probe link.

In case I was being too subtle above, I am certain this is a viral marketing campaign by McDonalds, to introduce Quarter Pounders to their regular menu. They are trying to generate buzz about a new tasty hamburger that's big, tastes OK, and is and cheap, to boot. Then, within a few weeks, they will reveal that - surprise - it was Makku all along, and quarter pounders will be available on all McDonalds menus nationwide.

EDIT: just noticed that David Marx at META no TAME agrees with my thesis.

[Neo-Rio]

In case I was being too subtle above, I am certain this is a viral marketing campaign by McDonalds, to introduce Quarter Pounders to their regular menu. They are trying to generate buzz about a new tasty hamburger that's big, tastes OK, and is and cheap, to boot. Then, within a few weeks, they will reveal that - surprise - it was Makku all along, and quarter pounders will be available on all McDonalds menus nationwide.

You might actually be right, on second thought.

McD has always had an image problem with shit-quality food. By pulling a switcheroo on people, some people might actually reason that - by golly gosh - the Quarter Pounder from McDonalds isn't so bad - regardless of how it's sold.

...at least that sorta makes sense.

[Doctor Stop]

They sold the Quarter Pounder here around five or so years ago. In the summer only, if I remember correctly.

[Kagetsu]

Typical business practice... Make over image. ^_^'

[GomiGirl]

What is a "quarter of a pound" in new money? I wonder if it has the same ring to it?

[Mike Oxlong]

About $1 AUD...

[GomiGirl]

About $1 AUD...

Ba boom tish!!

Nicely done.

[Phantom]

Do they say where the actual beef originates?

[wuchan]

Do they say where the actual beef originates?

The JR supplies it.........

[Mike Oxlong]

[omae mona]

[Iraira]

I see my thorough investigative reporting forced them to reveal their secret, finally. Glad to see millions of innocent consumers will no longer be deceived.

Thank you, I called this one first.....someone e-mail me a dead cow...no fuck that...I want a live one...burger party tonight.

[Mike Oxlong]

Like how we order steak back home..."Just bring me the cow, waiter. I'll cut off what I want, and ride the rest home"

[FG Lurker]

Like how we order steak back home..."Just bring me the cow, waiter. I'll cut off what I want, and ride the rest home"

My father likes his steak rare... REALLY rare. He tried telling waiters "blue rare" but it never came rare enough. Now he tells them, "Just restore the body heat." Gets some strange looks but it seems to be working well.

[omae mona]

Thank you, I called this one first.....someone e-mail me a dead cow...no fuck that...I want a live one...burger party tonight.

OK, I admit I did not use the required emoticons to indicate that "who on earth could be behind this?" was a rhetorical question (sorry, I thought my original post made it obvious that it was McDonald's). But I'm going to give you credit for being SECOND.

Still, the dead cow is on its way. Would you like fries with that?

[Iraira]

OK, I admit I did not use the required emoticons to indicate that "who on earth could be behind this?" was a rhetorical question (sorry, I thought my original post made it obvious that it was McDonald's). But I'm going to give you credit for being SECOND.

Still, the dead cow is on its way. Would you like fries with that?

I've just spent 10 minutes trying to think of something witty to say, and y'know what....can't come up with anything.... I thought about going the apple pie route, but that seemed too contrived.
Wanted to ask if you'd consider selling me the Hamburglar Fisting Mayor McCheese plastic toy that you got in that Happy Meal, but I'm sure you're holding on to that until the market stabalizes, and I can't outbid a lot of the perverts out there.

[omae mona]

[GomiGirl]

Before this gets any worse, maybe we should go back to the topic of the dead cows... (by the way, I think GomiGirl is now legally obligated to write "ewwwww" in a response)

Nah - in a former life, I used to work with dead cows.

[Taro Toporific]

Nah - in a former life, I used to work with dead cows.

It weird that GomiGirl in a former life used to work in a dead cow lab and I used to work dead poultry lab.

[Iraira]

Nah - in a former life, I used to work with dead cows.

yeah, got a few of those in the office, here. No life in some folks...same obento everyday....

and I used to work in a fruitfly lab....most of they were alive, but I starved, desiccated, ripped out ovaries, etc., millions to death....heartless bastard am I.

[Taro Toporific]

... I used to work in a fruitfly lab....most of they were alive, but I starved, desiccated, ripped out ovaries, etc., millions to death....heartless bastard am I.

The self-introductory phrase I always use is, "I was a teenage vivisectionist" ...That is, at age 19 as a work-study researcher I used to start every day by ripping out the "pipping body" from the brains of 100 live turkey poults.

[Iraira]

The self-introductory phrase I always use is, "I was a teenage vivisectionist" ...That is, at age 19 as a work-study researcher I used to start every day by ripping out the "pipping body" from the brains of 100 live turkey poults.

See, you got all the PETA losers po'ed at you because you hadda go and kill something that doesn't have an exoskeleton. No one cares, except for some kinda out there sects in India, about exoskeletons. Think about it, if you had an exoskeleton, your penis would essentially be erect 24-7. Egos aside, folks, you'd all save a lot on Viagra, Levitor, Cialis...not that I know of these, as I inject flies into my urethra every morning on the Marunouchi Line, which seems to do the trick.
I've ruined a lot of dinners when I tell people who are eating shrimp that they are basically eating modified insect. Fuck it, tastes good, yo.
And in closing, I'd like to thank those of you who invited me to give this speech tonight, I'll be signing breasts in the lobby, please line up by cup size.

[IkemenTommy]