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  • fuckedgaijin ‹ General ‹ Gaijin Ghetto

Random Comments from Nippon Newbies

Groovin' in the Gaijin Gulag
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64 posts • Page 2 of 3 • 1, 2, 3

Postby Behan » Wed Aug 27, 2008 11:59 pm

kusai Jijii wrote:Ah yes, "frivolous". If ever there was a word that ain't in the salaryman lexicon...
Your game is seriously dropping Take. :rolleyes:


He is probably the same kind of Japanophile otaku that he pretends to hate.
His [Brendan Behan's] last words were to several nuns standing over his bed, "God bless you, may your sons all be bishops."
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Postby Bucky » Sat Aug 30, 2008 8:57 am

Mrs. Bucky, upon her first visit the the US of A while still a student was surprised to find the there were 7/11 stores in California. "Eeeeeh? It is (was) an American company? I thought 7/11 was a Japanese company."
[font="Arial Black"][SIZE="7"]B[/SIZE][/font][font="Palatino Linotype"][SIZE="6"]u[/SIZE][/font][font="Comic Sans MS"][SIZE="5"]c[/SIZE][/font][font="Impact"][SIZE="6"]k[/SIZE][/font]
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Postby Kagetsu » Sat Aug 30, 2008 11:32 am

Takechanpoo wrote:You kidding me? This is nothing but a lip service to uncivilized Aussie, needless to say.
Apologize to Kyoto people, you two.
Identifying Kyoto with frivolous Melborum is a huge insult to Kyoto residents.
Conversly Melborune dudes should become delighted with it.


Wow... I didn't think anybody would actually believe I was serious.
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Postby sublight » Wed Sep 10, 2008 2:24 am

A story I heard from a buddy of mine.

There was a new guy fresh of the boat working at my friend J's school, so J decides to have some fun at the new guy's expense. New guy is just starting to sort out the basics of living on his own for the first time and asks J, "where can I buy laundry soap?" Without missing a beat, J tells him "that's easy. Soapland!"

Not only did the new guy fall for it, he used it in his lessons for the remainder of the day ("how do I get to the soapland?").
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Postby Osakadave » Tue Nov 25, 2008 1:42 pm

Overheard from a conversation between two FOBs discussing directions for where they were going from Tennoji last Saturday: "...then we take the Kancho-sen..."

:? Bet that was one painful train ride...
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Postby amdg » Tue Nov 25, 2008 8:45 pm

sublight wrote:A story I heard from a buddy of mine.

There was a new guy fresh of the boat working at my friend J's school, so J decides to have some fun at the new guy's expense. New guy is just starting to sort out the basics of living on his own for the first time and asks J, "where can I buy laundry soap?" Without missing a beat, J tells him "that's easy. Soapland!"

Not only did the new guy fall for it, he used it in his lessons for the remainder of the day ("how do I get to the soapland?").


Classic.
Mr Kobayashi: First, I experienced a sort of overpowering feeling whenever I was in the room with foreigners, not to mention a powerful body odor coming from them. I don't know whether it was a sweat from the heat or a cold sweat, but I remember I was sweating whenever they were around.
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Postby yanpa » Thu Nov 27, 2008 11:50 pm

Bucky wrote:Mrs. Bucky, upon her first visit the the US of A while still a student was surprised to find the there were 7/11 stores in California. "Eeeeeh? It is (was) an American company? I thought 7/11 was a Japanese company."


It certainly is now.

http://www.sej.co.jp/english/company/c_profile.html
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Postby Tengu Kid » Fri Nov 28, 2008 6:46 am

An extremely right wing American newbie co-worker once suddenly said `It`s so sad about Japan. You`ve just got to try and help them as much as you can while you`re here`. I never bothered asking what he was thinking...It was usually god related.
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Postby Greji » Fri Nov 28, 2008 11:27 am

Tengu Kid wrote:An extremely right wing American newbie co-worker once suddenly said `It`s so sad about Japan. You`ve just got to try and help them as much as you can while you`re here`. I never bothered asking what he was thinking...It was usually god related.


Populate?
:cool:
"There are those that learn by reading. Then a few who learn by observation. The rest have to piss on an electric fence and find out for themselves!"- Will Rogers
:kanpai:
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Postby turonkusu » Tue Dec 30, 2008 6:45 pm

BAM!! right in the heart!! I'll take to help with that help
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Postby turonkusu » Tue Dec 30, 2008 6:59 pm

Greji wrote:Populate?
:cool:


If I were Japanese I'd be offended, but since I'm not, I feel like I should help...
yare yare!! chau chau!! dame dame!!
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Postby Amanojakuu » Tue Aug 11, 2009 8:56 am

[quote="nottu"]Alright –]

Hehe,

Something similar to this happened to me in the UK... I worked at a call centre where there was a coffee vending machine. When you pressed a button, it told you how much you had to pay. I thought 'I wonder what happens when I press the unmarked buttons. One of them came up with 0p, so I pressed the 'serve' button, and sure enough I got a free cappuccino.

I thought I was onto a great thing until, several days later, an engineer came in to fix the machine. He served out dozens of free 'cappuccinos' and promptly poured them in the sink. I asked him what the button did....

They weren't cappuccino's, they were tray overflow...
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Postby Iraira » Tue Aug 11, 2009 12:28 pm

Amanojakuu wrote:Hehe,

Something similar to this happened to me in the UK... I worked at a call centre where there was a coffee vending machine. When you pressed a button, it told you how much you had to pay. I thought 'I wonder what happens when I press the unmarked buttons. One of them came up with 0p, so I pressed the 'serve' button, and sure enough I got a free cappuccino.

I thought I was onto a great thing until, several days later, an engineer came in to fix the machine. He served out dozens of free 'cappuccinos' and promptly poured them in the sink. I asked him what the button did....

They weren't cappuccino's, they were tray overflow...


But, was the overflow "cappucino" better than the one you normally had to pay for?
Takechanpoo:
"Yeah, I've been always awkward toward women and have spent pathetic life so far but I could graduate from being a cherry boy by using geisha's pussy at last! Yeah!! And off course I have an account in Fuckedgaijin.com. Yeah!!!"
;)
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Postby Amanojakuu » Tue Aug 11, 2009 2:25 pm

Ahhh, I suppose it wasn't that bad

The machine did do hot chocolate too, hence the slight mochareyness of the
brew.

I should have set up a sideline in mocha's
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Postby Mock Cockpit » Tue Aug 11, 2009 8:07 pm

Amanojakuu wrote:Hehe,

Something similar to this happened to me in the UK... I worked at a call centre where there was a coffee vending machine. When you pressed a button, it told you how much you had to pay. I thought 'I wonder what happens when I press the unmarked buttons. One of them came up with 0p, so I pressed the 'serve' button, and sure enough I got a free cappuccino.

I thought I was onto a great thing until, several days later, an engineer came in to fix the machine. He served out dozens of free 'cappuccinos' and promptly poured them in the sink. I asked him what the button did....

They weren't cappuccino's, they were tray overflow...

The funny is strong in this one!
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Postby CrankyBastard » Tue Aug 11, 2009 8:26 pm

Mock Cockpit wrote:The funny is strong in this one!



He does seem to poses a keen sense of the ridiculous.
It will serve him well here.
:cool:
The web is spun,
The net's been cast.
You are the prey,
Watch your ass!
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Postby Amanojakuu » Tue Aug 11, 2009 8:28 pm

Mock Cockpit wrote:The funny is strong in this one!


Ahhh Mock Cockpit... Thank you. But you'll quickly learn that that's the only funny story I have to tell :rofl:
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Postby nottu » Wed Aug 12, 2009 4:02 am

Last edited by nottu on Thu Oct 02, 2014 10:44 am, edited 1 time in total.
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Postby Jay Normous » Thu Oct 01, 2009 4:47 pm

I was waiting for my host mom to serve me dinner and I was staring at the rice spoon, trying to figure out the upside down writing on the handle.

It took me probably 30 seconds of intense staring before I figured out it was written in english.

It said 'Tiger'
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Postby Marked Trail » Fri Oct 09, 2009 9:56 pm

I forget whether this No0b-mindset stat was posted or not...


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Postby cujojpn » Sat Oct 10, 2009 1:32 am

Marked Trail wrote:I forget whether this No0b-mindset stat was posted or not...


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Isn't it true? I want me some schoolgirls waiting at NRT Terminal 2 when i arrive, and speaking Engrish about how much they "rove me" on Limousine to the Hotel.
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Postby Iraira » Sat Oct 10, 2009 3:20 am

Marked Trail wrote:I forget whether this No0b-mindset stat was posted or not...


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The otaku and bar-code greel salarimen are not properly represented in this pie chart.
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;)
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Postby XdmpriceX » Wed Apr 07, 2010 9:11 pm

Marked Trail wrote:I forget whether this No0b-mindset stat was posted or not...


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This is definitely what I was hoping for when I got here...
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Postby wuchan » Thu Apr 08, 2010 1:10 am

XdmpriceX wrote:This is definitely what I was hoping for when I got here...

[SIZE="1"][color="White"]ROFL[/color][/SIZE]

this is the place for noob comments......
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Postby DarkStatistic » Wed Nov 17, 2010 1:47 am

Before I came to Japan, I had a going away party. A "friend" who had been here before and who was teaching me a little Japanese told me that "cheers" was "kanpai" in Japanese -- unless you were being especially formal, in which case you had to say "kanpai opai".

So I diligently practiced the phrase. Sure enough, within my first week here I found myself drinking with coworkers and tried to be all smooth when making a toast... :-?
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Postby Iraira » Wed Nov 17, 2010 7:45 am

DarkStatistic wrote:Before I came to Japan, I had a going away party. A "friend" who had been here before and who was teaching me a little Japanese told me that "cheers" was "kanpai" in Japanese -- unless you were being especially formal, in which case you had to say "kanpai opai".

So I diligently practiced the phrase. Sure enough, within my first week here I found myself drinking with coworkers and tried to be all smooth when making a toast... :-?


Were you ever able to get some sort of suitable revenge on your friend?
Takechanpoo:
"Yeah, I've been always awkward toward women and have spent pathetic life so far but I could graduate from being a cherry boy by using geisha's pussy at last! Yeah!! And off course I have an account in Fuckedgaijin.com. Yeah!!!"
;)
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Postby Screwed-down Hairdo » Wed Nov 17, 2010 1:13 pm

Vhy don't you go back to zee Vest if you don't liken it here, schwein?
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Postby Screwed-down Hairdo » Wed Nov 17, 2010 1:15 pm

DarkStatistic wrote:Before I came to Japan, I had a going away party. A "friend" who had been here before and who was teaching me a little Japanese told me that "cheers" was "kanpai" in Japanese -- unless you were being especially formal, in which case you had to say "kanpai opai".

So I diligently practiced the phrase. Sure enough, within my first week here I found myself drinking with coworkers and tried to be all smooth when making a toast... :-?


Poor you...I bet he left you feeling like a real boob....

I suggest taking someone to a Japanese restaurant, recommending the extraordinarily tasty soup and then convince them to ask a waitress for some mekojiru.
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Postby BigInJapan » Wed Nov 17, 2010 1:28 pm

Screwed-down Hairdo wrote:I suggest taking someone to a Japanese restaurant, recommending the extraordinarily tasty soup and then convince them to ask a waitress for some mekojiru.

Then take them to a bar and have them ask the Mama-san for some of that relatively rare drink called wakame-zake...
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Postby waruta » Wed Nov 17, 2010 2:30 pm

BigInJapan wrote:Then take them to a bar and have them ask the Mama-san for some of that relatively rare drink called wakame-zake...


Or some shirako without telling them what it is.
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