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  • fuckedgaijin ‹ General ‹ Gaijin Ghetto

Bizarre Tom Cruise Speaks Bad Chinese

Groovin' in the Gaijin Gulag
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Bizarre Tom Cruise Speaks Bad Chinese

Postby kamome » Thu Dec 01, 2005 10:41 am

He's truly a nutcase.

Cruise Caught in Sonogram Squabble

Meanwhile, Cruise and Holmes have been taking a break from their at-home ultrasound project while spending time in Shanghai, where Cruise has been filming scenes for Mission: Impossible 3.

At a press roundup Wednesday, Cruise grabbed a cell phone from a reporter who dared to take a call during the event and began chatting to the surprised party at the other end.

"Put her on the phone. I want to talk to her," Cruise demanded, asking to talk to the female caller, whom he presumed to be the reporter's girlfriend.

"Hello. Xiexie. Ni hao. Are you good?" said Cruise, throwing out the Chinese words for "thank you" and "hello" like a natural.

"Are you good? Are you working?" he asked. "Are you going to get engaged? Soon? Maybe?"

After a translator stepped in to assist, it was revealed that the caller was actually the reporter's wife.

"Tell her I wish her happiness," Cruise said.


And Tom Cruise wants to irradiate his baby!!

First the American Psychiatric Association slammed the actor for referring to psychiatry as a "pseudoscience," calling Cruise's remarks "irresponsible." Now the American College of Radiology is up in arms over Cruise's admission that he purchased a sonogram machine and uses it to perform at-home ultrasounds on fiancee
Katie Holmes...

"I bought a sonogram machine," Cruise told Walters during the interview, which was taped Oct. 30. "I am going to donate it to a hospital when we are done."

Somewhat startled, Walters replied, "Wait, you are going to do your own sonogram?"

"Yes," Cruise replied, chuckling.

The couch-jumping thesp told Walters that he did not know the sex of his offspring, but that he saw "a little baby" when he performed the ultrasound.

Cruise's purchase is estimated to have set him back anywhere from $15,000 to $200,000. However, the ACR is not convinced that the War of the Worlds star fully understands the complexities of the device.

"The ACR is concerned that Tom Cruise has been badly advised regarding the use and potential abuse of ultrasound," Dr. Rumack stated. "There are many abnormalities that may be missed by the untrained eye. Also, if it is not medically necessary, the use of ultrasound raises unnecessary physical risk to the fetus."
:alien: <-- picture of Cruise's post-irradiated baby
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Re: Bizarre Tom Cruise Speaks Bad Chinese

Postby emperor » Thu Dec 01, 2005 11:24 am

kamome wrote:He's truly a nutcase...
Somewhat startled, Walters replied, "Wait, you are going to do your own sonogram?"
"Yes," Cruise replied, chuckling.


Its so they can see the pod-people inside themselves!

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Postby FG Lurker » Thu Dec 01, 2005 11:30 am

Cruise has become a real nutcase. Hard to imagine that he's gotten worse from when he was just a regular egomaniac, but he has... Fruitcake religious nutjobs. :roll:
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Postby Greener » Thu Dec 01, 2005 11:43 am

I never thought it was possible but Tom has gone from zero to Billy Bob in .078 seconds before our very eyes! (Billy Bob Thorton being the gold standard for living out your midlife crisis in public.) In fact, in terms of midlife crisis's that singlehandedly end someone's career, we may have a new champion!
Check out what I think you gaijins should be doing when you get to Japan at http://www.tokyoessentials.com ! Cum on, DO IT, I know you want to...
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Postby emperor » Thu Dec 01, 2005 12:19 pm

Greener wrote:Tom has gone from zero to Billy Bob in .078 seconds before our very eyes!


this period of his life has its own domainname..
http://www.tomcruiseisnuts.com

Tom Cruise wrote:"Some people, well, if they don't like Scientology, well, then, fuck you. Really. Fuck you. Period."


Last weeks Southpark episode "Trapped in the Closet" has Stan mistaken for the reincarnation of Ron L Hubbard (the founder of Scientology). When Tom asks Stan if hes proud of him, he replies that his movies are ok but that Leo DeCaprio is a better actor , he has a breakdown and locks himself in a closet and everyone is asking him to come of out of the closet including R Kelly and Travolta... at some point they go on to explain what Scientology is all about - I never knew it was so fucked up!!
A long time ago in a galaxy far far away...the evil ruler of the galaxy:Xenu? Intergalactic DC12s?? Frozen alien souls thrown into volcanos??? (..I think Lucas stole some of his Star Wars ideas from Hubbard)

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[size=84]Every fight is a food fight...
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Postby Greener » Thu Dec 01, 2005 5:40 pm

emperor wrote:
Greener wrote:Tom has gone from zero to Billy Bob in .078 seconds before our very eyes!


this period of his life has its own domainname..
http://www.tomcruiseisnuts.com

Tom Cruise wrote:"Some people, well, if they don't like Scientology, well, then, fuck you. Really. Fuck you. Period."


Last weeks Southpark episode "Trapped in the Closet" has Stan mistaken for the reincarnation of Ron L Hubbard (the founder of Scientology). When Tom asks Stan if hes proud of him, he replies that his movies are ok but that Leo DeCaprio is a better actor , he has a breakdown and locks himself in a closet and everyone is asking him to come of out of the closet including R Kelly and Travolta... at some point they go on to explain what Scientology is all about - I never knew it was so fucked up!!
A long time ago in a galaxy far far away...the evil ruler of the galaxy:Xenu? Intergalactic DC12s?? Frozen alien souls thrown into volcanos??? (..I think Lucas stole some of his Star Wars ideas from Hubbard)

Image
Image


Here are my rules for the Hollywood Midlife Crisis. Follow these rules and your career won't completely tank over this:

1. Abandon your wife and family.
2. Get a motorcycle.
3. Start acting completely out of character on camera ALL THE TIME!
4. Never attend an award show sober again.
5. Start dying your hair, growing strange facial hair, get tattoos, etc.
6. Dump said wife/family for Angelina Jolie.

Billy Bob Thorton followed ALL of these rules to a T and while he became a joke for a long time, isn't exactly finished. Brad Pitt has followed these rules except for #4 for the most part. It is still unclear if he will survive this or not. Tom on the other hand followed every rule except for the Angelina rule. If YOU look more fucked up than the girl you hooked up with during your Midlife Crisis, you will pay for it in the long run. (Katie seems scared and just there for the ride as her career hasn't got too many better prospects these days.)

If Tom's career survives this meltdown, I will add a 7th rule, call out Brooke Shields. Don't call out Tyra Banks because she could kick your ass.
Check out what I think you gaijins should be doing when you get to Japan at http://www.tokyoessentials.com ! Cum on, DO IT, I know you want to...
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Postby MrUltimateGaijin » Thu Dec 01, 2005 8:18 pm

just because he bought the sonogram machine doesnt mean he'll be using it himself. Im sure he can afford for the worlds best specialists to make house calls. You people gotta start thinking for yourself
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> fuck off!!!
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Postby FG Lurker » Thu Dec 01, 2005 8:57 pm

MrUltimateGaijin wrote:just because he bought the sonogram machine doesnt mean he'll be using it himself. Im sure he can afford for the worlds best specialists to make house calls. You people gotta start thinking for yourself

Yeah, you might be right... But then again, this is a guy who believes that his body is harbouring tiny space creatures... :lol:
And you run and you run to catch up with the sun but it's sinking
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Postby Mulboyne » Thu Dec 01, 2005 9:01 pm

This writer is Japanese, and this paper is about the similarities and differences of the Scientology religion with other religions of the world. This paper will also take a special interest in the similarities and differences from a Japanese perspective and thus will be comparing Scientology to Japanese religions.


http://www.bonafidescientology.org/Append/08/page00.htm
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Postby amdg » Thu Dec 01, 2005 9:22 pm

FG Lurker wrote:Yeah, you might be right... But then again, this is a guy who believes that his body is harbouring tiny space creatures... :lol:


Nu uh, he's theta clear. :D
Mr Kobayashi: First, I experienced a sort of overpowering feeling whenever I was in the room with foreigners, not to mention a powerful body odor coming from them. I don't know whether it was a sweat from the heat or a cold sweat, but I remember I was sweating whenever they were around.
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Postby sparkzilla » Thu Dec 01, 2005 9:32 pm

If he gives the baby too much ultrasound, it will end up left-handed.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Left-handed#Ultrasound
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Postby Greener » Thu Dec 01, 2005 9:41 pm

sparkzilla wrote:If he gives the baby too much ultrasound, it will end up left-handed.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Left-handed#Ultrasound


Hey, I resemble that remark. :evil:
Check out what I think you gaijins should be doing when you get to Japan at http://www.tokyoessentials.com ! Cum on, DO IT, I know you want to...
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