My family had some whale paste yesterday...

[cstaylor]

...stuff tastes like the glue used to put up wallpaper. I'll just add that to my list of non-edible Japanese "delicacies":

- Natto
- Umeboshi
- ika guts
- shirako
- kujira paste

[cstaylor]

You betray your semi-F*cked status. Give it some more time.

As I told my father-in-law, "dislikes, especially violent ones, add character". What fun would it be if I dug all Japanese food? Here's how my conversations go with Japanese acquaintances:

Me: ::eating sashimi or something with my ohashi::
Them: "Wow, you're very good with ohashi"
Me: ::looking at their horrible form:: "That's because I practiced every day in America by picking up some objects off the table. Coins, pieces of lint, toothpicks"
Them: "Honto?"
Me: ::rolling my eyes:: "No. Man, are you gullible"

:: more eating ::

Them: "So, do you like sashimi?"
Me: ::finishing my 12th maguro:: "Not really."
Them: "Honto?"
Me: ::reaching over their plate with my ohashi, grabbing their last maguro:: "Nope." ::popping their sashimi in my mouth:: "Didn't like that one either"

:: more eating ::

Them: "Is there any Japanese food you don't like"
Me: "Sure."
Them: "And it is???"
Me: "Two words. Natto kusai."
Them: "Ehhhhhhhhh?!? Natto daisuki! Oishi"
Me: ::passing my untouched natto across the table:: "Here. Have mine. Knock yourself out."

[cstaylor]

That reminds me, one major problem I have in Japan - sarcasm doesn't usually translate well.

I've found some sarcasm works pretty well... but only if it's very short, and not the kind of sarcasm where you need some sort of physical accompanyment (like rolling the eyes or making a gesture). Puns seem to work much better though (especially if the pun is on an American word, and not a Japanese one). For example, my aunt in Kyoto asked me about religion:

Aunt: "Are you a Christian?"
Me: "Me?..." ::pausing:: "Not really... but you can call me Chris-chan"

That would be lame if I said it in America, but my aunt was laughing for almost five minutes (maybe's my family's weird or something...).

[cstaylor]

I'm LMAO too. You gaijin are so crazy!

Okay, I get it, sarcasm.

[cstaylor]

AHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAH!

Now, don't be grumpy because my superior statistical skills mesh so smoothly with my rapier wit.