A Truly Fucked Gaijin

[TFG]

Any serious thoughts on this subject people?

[Mulboyne]

It sounds like the world is conspiring against you but try not to get negative about finding a job no matter how many knock-backs you get. Keep looking, stay fresh and you'll find something. Finding work should still be your number one priority: it will give you more room to breathe and time to deal with your other problems.

Did the cost of building the house include a transaction where you bought the land from your father-in-law? If not, then he can probably say that he was "lending" you the land which is why he maintained his title. That may make a difference to any claim you might have. If you have records showing payments from your salary to pay off the housing loan, however, then you may be able to establish a claim to ownership even though your name isn't on the deeds

[amdg]

Depending on where you are, there are probably some free legal consultation services around. I would recommend you do that as soon as possible, if you haven't already. If you have more than one free consultation service go to all of them if you can (sometimes one lawyer's advice is not as good as another's). If you need some help finding a service PM me with your location.
Keep your head up, gather all your receipts that show you helped pay the loan, and keep you inkans in a safe place away from the misses.
You also say it's the wife's fault for the marriage not working - is that fault something that you could prove in court?

[TFG]

Thanks again

[Big Booger]

If all else fails, burn that fucker to the ground and head back to your home country.

But before you do that, start pouring battery acid, used motor oil and shitloads of other lethal chemicals around the place...

Get a shovel, and dig hundreds of holes about 20 centimeters down, poor the shit in, then bury it... Do this at night when no one's looking..

Put used batters, computer components, bleach, toilet cleansers, car batteries, gasoline, oil, grease... or any other chemical you can find.

Make sure you do this in secret so it takes them a while to find out what is happening... by the time they discover it, you should be back in your home country and smiling ear to ear.

Just before it's time to go, cancel any and all insurance on the house (if you can)... The day before you leave the house for the airport, stoke it full of cardboard boxes, newspapers, and any other quick burning materials...

Then get a kotatsu, and turn that fucker up on the highest level you can get it.... and shove a couple hundred or so pages of newspapers under the kotatsu....

Then go outside and wait until you smell smoke... at that time, either foot it or pedal it to the nearest train station and make way for the airport.

That should properly fuck your in-laws and ex-wife. Have a pleasant time preparing this!

Note: Do this only if all other options fail.

[TFG]

Good idea Big Booger

[amdg]

Oh yeah, and as an addition to what BB said, when you get back home, anonymously mail her a small package of the stickiest of the icky together with a note written in Japanese comprising instructions about who she is to pass it on to (with code-names like ミ木息子). Repeat this every month.

[TFG]

I like the sticky idea with information on how much to sell it for and where to send the money. LoL

[Greji]

Repeat this every month.

amdg and BB!

If I ever decide to get a divorce, is it possible that I could retain the two you to work with my legal team to tidy up a few of the details?

[amdg]

We are but humble servants of justice, at your command Gboothe.

One other thing TFG, before you execute BB's excellent fumigation plan, send a letter (not a phone call) to the insurance company notifying them that you have, for the past 5 years, been operating the house as a kind of minshuku for foreign visitors, and you apologise for not telling them sooner and you hope that it does not effect the insurance coverage that you have.

[CrankyBastard]

Late 40's is'nt so late to start over.
Believe me.
Good luck.

[james]

[TFG]

Ooops, sorry for all the repeated posts.
A

[FG Lurker]

Any serious thoughts on this subject people?

Well, you're fucked. It is not nice to hear that, but it is best to admit it and move on.

If you have a really strong case with proof that your wife was making problems (affairs etc) then you might be best to negotiate with her father and accept a pay-out in return for not "disturbing the wa" so to speak. NOT BLACKMAIL!!! Just letting him know what is going to happen (court, publicity, etc) and saying that you'd really sooner not put him through that.

If you have no chance of doing that then I suggest walking away, moving somewhere where you won't have contact with them and then starting over. Not easy, but the best thing to do is rarely easy.

[AssKissinger]

Your story is very frightening.

So, I am living on about 50,000 Yen a month which is no mean feat.

Can't you at least teach English?

[TFG]

That is the real problem.

[homesweethome]

I don't know all the ins and out of this but off the top I would say most definately STAY WHERE YOU ARE! If you have not moved out of the house that you bought and paid for yet, by all means stay there. That will give you at least some legal rights and a place to live and conduct your business.

Forget Family court, just go through the process saying no to everything they suggest, your only hope is that it does go to court. You can apply for legal aid and in your circumstances probably get it. Do you know how to do this? You are a PR of Japan and legally entitled to it, by all means apply for it. Once they assign you a lawyer, your job will be much easier.

Apply for living assistance. You are a legal resident of Japan and entitled to this. Do you know that? There is no reason you have to starve at the hands of your wife and inlaws. You need only ask, meet the criteria and all will be taken care of. YOU ARE A LEGAL PERMINANT RESIDENT OF JAPAN. Don't let them tell you otherwise or settle for less than you think is right.

As for the Father-In-Law owning the land that you have resided on in your house for MANY years, well there is a lot that can be done. Please just don't give up and do these few things in the meantime.

[AssKissinger]

The over 350 jobs I have already applied for are English teaching jobs which I have the experience and credentials for. However, the problem is being in my late 40's or so it seems. I even got sent an email that should have been an internal email at one of the schools I applied to which stated, "This applicant has all the credentials and experience we are seeking but I don't recommend employing him because of his age"! Needless to say, this was a kick in the mental groin

OK, I get it. And the business you had going was a little eikaiwa run out of your house,then? Are you going mobile and picking up work wherever you can? What kind of area are you in? Big city, inaka, suburbs or what? I understand, that naturally you need to focus on the house but, I can't help but wonder if you don't also need to take a new strategy regarding how you're going about generating income.

Also, I know this is kind of a sucky plan b but if you do end up losing your domicile with an income that has dropped so low and no way enough dough to restart back home (it costs a fucking fortune) maybe you should consider applying for jobs in Korea. They do routinely provide a place to stay and you can save some money in the meantime.

[homesweethome]

OK, I get it. And the business you had going was a little eikaiwa run out of your house,then? Are you going mobile and picking up work wherever you can? What kind of area are you in? Big city, inaka, suburbs or what? I understand, that naturally you need to focus on the house but, I can't help but wonder if you don't also need to take a new strategy regarding how you're going about generating income.

Also, I know this is kind of a sucky plan b but if you do end up losing your domicile with an income that has dropped so low and no way enough dough to restart back home (it costs a fucking fortune) maybe you should consider applying for jobs in Korea. They do routinely provide a place to stay and you can save some money in the meantime.

Is this what you would do in the OP's case?

I doubt it.

Go to a place where you know nobody, know nothing of the language, can only rely on the good graces of some Korean Eikawa lord? At your age in your late 40's after having lived in Japan for 20 some years?

Come on, seriously that is just typical FG advice.

Can't you do better than that?

[TFG]

I can't get the Seikatsu Hogo or social support as my wife is working.

[AssKissinger]

I qualified it as a 'sucky plan b'. Would I do it? If it was between that and going home completely empty handed with nothing lined-up I might. Can I do better? Well, fight the good fight has already been stated. Also, I'm trying to investigate whether or not there's some way he can work on his income strategies. He's in a fucking tough situation. If I had something better I'd certainly come out with it.

[AssKissinger]

My wife says don't sign any divorce papers and you should go to "cimin houritsu soudan" for legal help. Also, have you been paying into 'nankin'? One of the things that my wife thinks could work to your advantage is if you can establish that your wife didn't have the means to pay for the house indepently. Handing over your pay to the wife is nothing new in Japan so the courts are likely to be sympathetic. As for your father-in-law owning the land my wife says that this also happens to Japanese people quite often; so the courts are familar with this kind of case.

[amdg]

Just out of curiosity, and as a lesson for others, what steps should he have taken (years ago) to protect himself in this situation? Anyone know?

[TFG]

He, I should have done the following.

[homesweethome]

Just out of curiosity, and as a lesson for others, what steps should he have taken (years ago) to protect himself in this situation? Anyone know?

Well for one thing he could have gotten a written agreement from his father in law, just something stating that the house on his land has perminant residency:) And he could have insisted that the house be registered in his name or his wife and his jointly. And he could have kept a record of joint income and expenditures, how much of his/her income went to paying off the mortgage, upkeep on the house and so on. Actually he should be able to show that he has had income for the last 20 years by tax/work records and given the amount of the mortgage vs how much his wife made during that time, it would have been impossible for her to pay all the mortgage off by herself, which the court will most likely understand anyway. That would have helped him in court today or soon to be when he argues that the house is jointly his and his wifes because he helped pay for it.

At least he should be offered a monetary settlement from his wife/father-in-law I would think.

[TFG]

[quote="AssKissinger"]My wife says don't sign any divorce papers and you should go to "cimin houritsu soudan" for legal help. Also, have

[FG Lurker]

Just out of curiosity, and as a lesson for others, what steps should he have taken (years ago) to protect himself in this situation? Anyone know?

I'm not sure how things were 20 years ago, but today I believe joint titles are possible. Anyone buying a house now should in the least have the title held jointly.

It is definitely no problem to have land in the name a non-Japanese (even non permanent resident) today. I bought one place here before I had PR, and another after getting PR, and both are in my name.

I would also suggest that it is not a good idea to build on land that isn't owned by you. No matter how good things might look at the present time, having your house on someone else's land is going to greatly complicate things should problems occur. Besides that, houses tend to depreciate here and land is starting to appreciate in major urban centers. Owning the house without the land is not wise from a financial perspective. (That said, TFG would have lost money on the land if he had bought it in the bubble, but I'm speaking with regards to what to do today.)

Just my 2cents worth...

[homesweethome]

This is good general advise. But in the OP's case there are some rights he has that should be brought out into the open.

1. Nobody can deny you access to your property even if you have to cross their land to get to your house.

2. Nobody can tear down a structure they don't own even if it is on their land and especially if someone is living in it.

That is why I told the OP to stay where he is. Even if the Father in law thinks it might be 'difficult' for the OP to continue to reside where he is, he has rights that are being ignored, the right to live in his house and the right to access it.

What is required here is a change of mindset from being the prey to being the hunter.

[amdg]

Good advice HSH

[Samurai_Jerk]

Just out of curiosity, and as a lesson for others, what steps should he have taken (years ago) to protect himself in this situation? Anyone know?

I'd say the most important thing is DO NOT GET MARRIED! Thank you.