SHE Proposed|I'm saying NO

[mr. sparkle]

[Tsuru]

Congratulations for keeping your head on, I'm sure you'll find someone who's right for you in the end.

Do I understand correctly that she was married before? That should be your biggest reason to say no.


To put it in context I'm absolutely sure I've found the perfect person to spend the rest of my life with, and when push comes to shove it will probably be me who will be proposing. It's a strange feeling when you realize you are done searching, knowing that anything else you will come across in the future will not be as good for you and to you as her.

[mr. sparkle]

[AssKissinger]

"Hey, why did you not want to be romantic last night?" She said, "No, you misunderstood my letters. You're just like my ex-husband and old boyfriend, you all misunderstand. I love you only as friend."

WTF? You made a seven-thousand mile booty-call that didn't pan-out? I've known J-bitches in arrested development but that really takes the case. Talk about junior high!

Dude, your whole story totally freaks me out! I'd like to hear her side but anyway, yeah, for God's sake don't marry her or you'll end up crazier and more fucked up than she is. Plus, are you ready to move to Japan and give up your employment in the states? Getting the visa worked out for her will take forever, especially since you haven't even been living in the same country for ages.

She must have some kind of cunt to have kept your interest as long as she has with that kind of behavior.

I've heard some stories about crazy J-chicks but yours is a whopper!

[Tsuru]

Why do you think it's the biggest reason as to not marry her?

I think that should be self-explanatory

Ask yourself one simple question: If it didn't work out with the other guy why should it work out with you? Especially given the whole proposition of you giving up your life in the States to spend your life with a woman who has already seen the other side of the proverbial fence and knows all the rules. You don't want to go there.

If this whole thing is indeed as you say it is then purely from a cost-benefit point of view it is simply not worth it. You can pat yourself on the shoulder for having arrived at that conclusion yourself without regard for whatever emotions were clouding up your thought processes at the time.

Oh, and another thing: Japan is a Western country. The "too Westernized" argument is BS just for this simple reason.

[mr. sparkle]

WTF? You made a seven-thousand mile booty-call that didn't pan-out?

No. I've made many more 5,000 mile booty calls that didn't pan out. Let's see... the total is up to 9 trips to Japan. Sure, me 'n Pongi and Guy Jean and all the other FGs kick it, but one of the main reasons was to see her. Her family loves me, so it's fun to see them too.

I've known J-bitches in arrested development but that really takes the case. Talk about junior high!

It took a long time to figure that out. But it came to this for me to face my real feelings.

Dude, your whole story totally freaks me out! I'd like to hear her side but anyway

In writing my post, I think I really am being as honest about the situation as I can be.

For God's sake don't marry her or you'll end up crazier and more fucked up than she is.

Plus, are you ready to move to Japan and give up your employment in the states?

Hell no. She would've moved here. Otherwise, it's a no go.

Getting the visa worked out for her will take forever, especially since you haven't even been living in the same country for ages.

I know. I read that thread. I don't know your situation exactly, but from what you do say, it doesn't sound good. Gimme a PM on the side, if possible. I'm curious about that.

I also read the "taima" thread with interest as well. I don't think she'd be as down with the herb as your old lady. A minor thing, but it would suck to not be able to medicate with the herbals.

She must have some kind of cunt to have kept your interest as long as she has with that kind of behavior.

My White Knight behavior is equally as deplorable. I gotta knock that shit off.

I've heard some stories about crazy J-chicks but yours is a whopper!

Thanks a lot for your support dude.

[mr. sparkle]

Dual Post

[mr. sparkle]

I think that should be self-explanatory ]
I dunno. 'Cause he was a dick?

Especially given the whole proposition of you giving up your life in the States to spend your life with a woman who has already seen the other side of the proverbial fence and knows all the rules. You don't want to go there.

No, she would've relocated to L.A. and give up her shit to be with Sparkle-san.

If this whole thing is indeed as you say it is then purely from a cost-benefit point of view it is simply not worth it. You can pat yourself on the shoulder for having arrived at that conclusion yourself without regard for whatever emotions were clouding up your thought processes at the time.

Well, thanks. I also have thanks to lend Mr. Pongi, who did not say one unkind thing about this woman, even though he knows her personally and knows about all the times she gave me the screw−however, he pointed out about my financial situation and potential logistical nightmare.

Thanks Rob.

Oh, and another thing: Japan is a Western country. The "too Westernized" argument is BS just for this simple reason.

Interesting. I don't know if that's the real reason. Might be one formed inside my head.

Thanks again for posting bro.

[Taro Toporific]

Thanks for the thumbs up on the thumb's down.

To quote Mrs. Taro, "She's a strange one. Sparkle-san understands."

Sorry to say, but she smells your money. She certain looks smoking hot for her age but she would be hell to live with (and there's the added issues of her son who is entering the "expensive age").

[kamome]

Sparkle, do you get the feeling that she's "settling" for you out of desperation or loneliness or something? If that's the case, why marry into that? She'll start to resent you (and you her). Anyway, it appears there's no question in your mind that this would be a mistake. Enjoy the LA girls and forget about this one.

[AssKissinger]

One thing though, when a man reaches a certain age, it is time to settle down. No woman is perfect. But this one is just a little too far off the mark.

[mr. sparkle]

Sparkle, do you get the feeling that she's "settling" for you out of desperation or loneliness or something?

Mmmm, yeah. That did enter my mind.

If that's the case, why marry into that? She'll start to resent you (and you her). Anyway, it appears there's no question in your mind that this would be a mistake.

The longer I think about it, the more it doesn't make sense, y'know?

Enjoy the LA girls and forget about this one.

Yeah, I've got a social circle going and dropping some weight so it won't be long to hook up with LA's finest with my "sparkling" personality. My apato complex alone is loaded with young starlets.

[mr. sparkle]

One thing though, when a man reaches a certain age, it is time to settle down. No woman is perfect. But this one is just a little too far off the mark.

Which is why I was thinking about giving it a shot at first. I have had very, very few long-term relationships-never been good with the ladies, and the thought of not ever hooking it up is a fear that I constantly battle against. Well, this is a separate issue and one I probably need counseling for sooner or later.

So, I have not said NO yet. She still thinks it's "on" because she could not de-cipher my ambiguity.

So now I have to think of a way to break it to her. I think it's going to have to come up at the front part of the conversation: my chief concerns which involve not really having a proper foundation to place a marriage on.

As far as she being a bit too far off target, I agree AK.

[mr. sparkle]

To quote Mrs. Taro, "She's a strange one. Sparkle-san understands."

Gotta love your gal. Please say hello for me.

Sorry to say, but she smells your money.

Funny you say that. This whole proposal thing came when I told her of a possible job on a major feature film as the 1st Asst. Editor under a real Hollywood master. The job didn't pan out, but look what it overturned!

She certain looks smoking hot for her age but she would be hell to live with (and there's the added issues of her son who is entering the "expensive age").

Ooooof. You mean college, don'tcha? Now that can't be cheap.

Thanks so much for your input, dude.

[james]

dtmfa..

maybe not my place to be piping in, but i honestly think the single best thing you could do, in addition to telling her "no freakin way" in no uncertain terms, is to cut off any and all contact with her, period.

[Big Booger]

You should console her once more and really run her cunny through the mud... use and abuse'r, take'r up the dirt trail, doggy, froggy but no need to get her soggy... spray your seed all over... and then... And then tell her to get the fuck out of your life. Don't be kind... right after fucking her hard and heavy, dump her like the trash that she is... zip your pants and take off. Never call her again or get in contact with her.

I'd seriously do that.. Sparkles. This girl is trash (whether she's a friend or not) to treat you like this on the emotional rollercoaster you've experienced so far... deserves a good ass fuck, donkey punch and then disappear.

[Samurai_Jerk]

One thing though, when a man reaches a certain age, it is time to settle down.

Fuck that bullshit. There's never a certain age to settle down.

[AssKissinger]

How old are you, SJ?

[Samurai_Jerk]

Early 30s.

[AssKissinger]

Yeah, I mean, most men feel the need to settle down, nothing is right for everyone.

[Adhesive]

Damn. Your situation kind of reminds me of one I got myself into, but I was only 18 at the time, and learned my lesson quickly.

I think you're making the right decision with this one, buddy. I know girls like this, and they will provide you with nothing but drama for the rest of your life.

Run away, cut off all contact, and erase her from your memory as soon as possible.

[Samurai_Jerk]

Yeah, I mean, most men feel the need to settle down, nothing is right for everyone.

Let me guess, you thought I was younger and were going to tell me I'd feel differently when I got older.

I personally don't have a strong desire to settle down or even have a steady girlfriend. I'm not saying I won't one day or that I'm against the idea. I just get tired of people telling that I'll change my mind someday or I need to get a girlfriend or a wife.

Sometimes, I think my lack of interest in being in a serious relationship makes certain people uncomfortable. It's almost as if they think I'm looking down on them for having a partner.

I do agree with you that holding out for that perfect person is fairytale bullshit.

[mr. sparkle]

Let me guess, you thought I was younger and were going to tell me I'd feel differently when I got older.

I personally don't have a strong desire to settle down or even have a steady girlfriend. I'm not saying I won't one day or that I'm against the idea. I just get tired of people telling that I'll change my mind someday or I need to get a girlfriend or a wife.

Sometimes, I think my lack of interest in being in a serious relationship makes certain people uncomfortable. It's almost as if they think I'm looking down on them for having a partner.

I do agree with you that holding out for that perfect person is fairytale bullshit.

My outlook is similar, but these days I actually wouldn't mind hookin' it up with the right one. But unless and until that happens, fuck it. I am happy also on my own (mum raised me that way). The few relationships I have been in have also been roller coaster rides, so yes, I'm gunshy. Also, 'cause my parents were divorced, I don't ever want to put myself through that. Probably why I have not seriously pursued marriage.

I am having a good time getting out there and socializing, now that I am new in town and LA is fun for me.

I've also been invited on a diving trip to Krabi from a Thai Doctor Lady in March. Who would want to pass that up? This one I am actually totally infatuated with and hope to get to know better. Another reason that I'm not ready to marry.

Photoshopped up for my myspace "band" page, she is on the right.

[AssKissinger]

Let me guess, you thought I was younger and were going to tell me I'd feel differently when I got older.

Nah. I wouldn't say that to you. I'd let you consider it though. When I was young I said I never wanted children and people said that to me. Now that I'm older I'm very glad I don't have kids and I want them less than ever. I hate the way everyone with kids assumes it's universal joy that must be the right thing for everyone. If kids are so universally wonderful why are so many of them neglected and abused?

[Greji]

"..... I care about her, but I don't think I love her...."

I think you have answered your own question. So, unless she is a billionaire and owns a bar, the answer is no.

I don't think you need to drop her as a friend unless you want to, but you have to tell her upfront that it ain't going beyond the close friends/close pards point.

She may split on that, but you never know. However, you don't be in position to have her believe you are the one who (true or not) led her on! She has to understand clearly that there is an exit to all this, regardless how you feel, or what you say.

[AssKissinger]

1) Shave her pussy
2) Buttfuck her
3) Tell her if she gives you 100 cum swallowing blow jobs you'll marry her but then after the 99th blow job tell it wouldn't be right to let her continue because you've changed your mind.

[American Oyaji]

1) Shave her pussy
2) Buttfuck her
3) Tell her if she gives you 100 cum swallowing blow jobs you'll marry her but then after the 99th blow job tell it wouldn't be right to let her continue because you've changed your mind.

Hey AK. Remember when I mentioned something about pulling an AK?

I rest me case.

Anyway. Sparkle-san. You've made the right decision. Drop her like a stinky diaper and kick her to the curb.

[AssKissinger]

Busted!

[james]

Nah. I wouldn't say that to you. I'd let you consider it though. When I was young I said I never wanted children and people said that to me. Now that I'm older I'm very glad I don't have kids and I want them less than ever. I hate the way everyone with kids assumes it's universal joy that must be the right thing for everyone. If kids are so universally wonderful why are so many of them neglected and abused?

said i'd never get married. said i'd never have kids. now i'm married with 2 kids and it all happened so fast. do i think i did the wrong thing? hell no. did i do it at the right time? i dunno but things have worked out the way they have and that's what it is now.

i totally love my kids. as for other peoples', i'm usually glad to send 'em home after class. agreed that they're not for everyone and there are far too many unfit parents. i also completely understand and respect those who don't want to "settle down". hindsight being 20/20 i'd have probably waited some. live and let live, and for sure there's no need to rush a damn thing or do it at all - *especially* if you're a guy. the simple fact of the matter is we're basically fertile till the day we die and have a longer "best before" date, even if on average we kick up sooner.

[mr. sparkle]

1) Shave her pussy
2) Buttfuck her
3) Tell her if she gives you 100 cum swallowing blow jobs you'll marry her but then after the 99th blow job tell it wouldn't be right to let her continue because you've changed your mind.

[Coffee shoots straight through nostrils onto keyboard.]

Funny, I don't think I've received oral gratification from the young lady even once. For sure, never done the dirty. A lifetime w/o blowjobs? No WAY Jose!