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  • fuckedgaijin ‹ General ‹ F*cked News

An FG's Life in Jail

Odd news from Japan and all things Japanese around the world.
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An FG's Life in Jail

Postby Captain Japan » Tue Sep 11, 2007 11:32 am

This week's Metropolis feature, an account by an FG of his three weeks in jail, has been getting a lot of play over at Japan Today. It's not pretty reading, and I can't say I have an ounce of sympathy for him...
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One foreigner's experience in a Japanese jail
Metropolis
TOKYO ― Paul Green spent three weeks in a Shinjuku lock-up. Here is an account of his experience.

Day 1: Blood and Processing

After 17 hours of interrogation, I had an arrest warrant slapped down on the dirty table in front of me, as if the cop was happy to finally have found his serial killer.

The warrant said “for not cooperating with the police and hitting a man with a bottle.” I was definitely guilty of not cooperating with the police, but as the obviously far-from-meticulous detective team would later find out by video, not guilty of hitting some guy with a bottle. My attack on the “victim” had been fired by his drunken physical taunts and led to injuries mimicking those of a bottle to the brow. He himself was so drunk and shaken up that he said he wasn’t sure what happened.

The room, now packed with eight police of varying rank and each sporting different attire, heated up when the lead detective walked in to ask about my now deformed hand. The metacarpal had snapped on the third punch to the Goliath-sized “victim” I had taken down. It was now swollen and becoming near vestigial.

I was ushered to the elevator in my ropes and handcuffs under the eyes of all those on the afternoon shift, keeping my nose up, not bothering to be embarrassed....more...
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Postby Charles » Tue Sep 11, 2007 11:55 am

After 19 days in jail, he is triumphant that one of his beers survived the attack.

I can only come to one conclusion...
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Postby prolly » Tue Sep 11, 2007 11:56 am

with phrases like, "The Smart Monkey," and "..but in truth I wanted to kill her," it's no wonder the whole article's message board is against this moron.
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Postby prolly » Tue Sep 11, 2007 11:58 am

the writing alone (didnt get all teh way to the beer triumph) had me guessing already....

Charles wrote:After 19 days in jail, he is triumphant that one of his beers survived the attack.

I can only come to one conclusion...
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Postby Charles » Tue Sep 11, 2007 12:02 pm

prolly wrote:the writing alone (didnt get all teh way to the beer triumph) had me guessing already....

Confirmed by eyewitness testimony. Search the comments for the word "bogan."
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Postby Gestalt » Tue Sep 11, 2007 12:28 pm

Wow, not only is the guy a complete idiot but he can't write for sh*t either. In that suit he looks more like a Shinjuku scout than anything else.

Try this link for a much, much better ( and much longer ) account of one FGs time in a Japanese prison:
http://www.stippy.com/japan-life/gaijin-in-a-japanese-prison-1/
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Postby Kuang_Grade » Tue Sep 11, 2007 12:45 pm

While overly long, the multiple piece story a few months back on one guy's time in J jail limbo on Stippy.com was much more interesting and informative than this crap metropolis piece....It is not a good piece when you wish the 'victim' was still in jail, or at a minimum, you feel a loss because the author did not get his ass kicked repeatedly by his cellmates and/or guards.

http://www.stippy.com/japan-life/gaijin-in-a-japanese-prison-1/
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Postby Catoneinutica » Tue Sep 11, 2007 2:37 pm

What the Dickens?! It's Lad!

http://www.japantoday.com/jp/bbs/msg/Lad

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Postby Hokuto-shinken » Tue Sep 11, 2007 2:48 pm

I had a translator sitting next to my floor-fastened chair. My lawyer said be nice to the prosecutor, so I was, but in truth I wanted to kill her.

The prosecutor knew the basic facts of the case: I had punched a guy so hard and so many times that his nose was shattered and his monkey forehead ripped. Therefore, I must be a criminal.

Well, I am sorry, but this guy seems to belong in jail. I don`t know why he thinks he is so innocent. In what country can you viciously attack a man just for calling your girlfriend and you names?
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Postby amdg » Tue Sep 11, 2007 3:02 pm

Although I agree that this guy probably belongs in jail in the grand scheme of things, the other guy did assault him first (according to his story anyway, if we can believe that). In the real world, pulling someone's tie, yelling at them in a threatening way and hitting their arms would generally be considered enough to allow for preventative retaliation.

Anyway, I have no love for either of them - I say put them both in the same cell and don't let them out until one of them is the other guy's bitch.
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Postby Neo-Rio » Tue Sep 11, 2007 3:25 pm

Wasn't that like the first chapter of "How to win friends and influence people", where we learnt that even mass murderers think that they are, deep down, good natured people?

Some drunk guy getting edgy doesn't warrant his face getting pulverized. I'd say the jail time was well served.
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Postby GomiGirl » Tue Sep 11, 2007 3:49 pm

I actually know this guy. He didn't go looking for the fight and it is hard to know what anybody would do if faced what he was faced with. The fight rather than flight instinct kicked in I guess. Depending on who you believe, the big guy was hassling them, this led to names of "dirty gaijin" which led to pushing (by the big guy) and then to the "excessive self defence" that landed Paul in jail.

I really don't like violence of any sort, but if you thought your girlfriend was going to be hurt by another guy, what would you do.

His writing is a bit egotistical though. But he is really bitter after the experience. Any other country they would hold you probably overnight only for a fight.
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Postby amdg » Tue Sep 11, 2007 4:05 pm

Interesing Gomi - but we want to know more! :D
Mr Kobayashi: First, I experienced a sort of overpowering feeling whenever I was in the room with foreigners, not to mention a powerful body odor coming from them. I don't know whether it was a sweat from the heat or a cold sweat, but I remember I was sweating whenever they were around.
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Postby Takechanpoo » Tue Sep 11, 2007 4:12 pm

After all this dude must be eikaiwa teacher.
J-police should supervise them more strictly.
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Postby Greji » Tue Sep 11, 2007 5:00 pm

amdg wrote:Although I agree that this guy probably belongs in jail in the grand scheme of things, the other guy did assault him first (according to his story anyway, if we can believe that). In the real world, pulling someone's tie, yelling at them in a thretening way and hitting their arms would generally be considered enough to allow for preventative retaliation.


Agreed. Where I come from, if he jumps on me and my lady and starts getting grabby, neckties, or whatever, it is custom that you wind his clock.

This dude (dud?) spent less than the maximum (23 days) in the slammer. He was released and not indicted, so what's his bitch? The yak he roomed with seemed to like him. Maybe he got to be his bitch.

At any rate, no indictment, no charge. They do not sentence you to time served in Japan. You must be indicted first for any sentencing (other than traffic). It appears to be another case of a "Hail the conquering Hero" FG, being surprised that someone might jump in his untouchable shit.

But, having said that if that other dude hadda grabbed me like that, I would have done my boy scout best to have knocked his dick in the dust in a similar manner.

I say put them both in the same cell and don't let them out until one of them is the other guy's bitch.


Probably no need, it sounds like the yak was handling his proctology quite nicely!
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Postby MrUltimateGaijin » Tue Sep 11, 2007 6:10 pm

He must be a bit of a moran to come accross as that much of an arsehole
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Postby Samurai_Jerk » Tue Sep 11, 2007 6:38 pm

I have to agree that the guy who got his ass beat deserved it (if Paul's version of the story is true). Unfortunately the laws in the country make it very tough to be a man in such a situation.
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Postby canman » Tue Sep 11, 2007 6:54 pm

OF the situation, you have to admit this guy has some rage issues to deal with. First off, he must be a pretty mean fucker to lay a beating on a guy like that. Next he claims he wants to kill the prosecutor, and he would do it again in a heart beat, if the opportunity arose.
I found his writing to be so obnoxious. Who cares if you have silk batman boxers on. How does your Hermes tie make you any better than anyone else.
He also doesn't mind breaking the law, while in jail. Taking smuggled tranquillizers and then getting some more for his cell mates.
Not what I would call a first rate person.
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Postby Catoneinutica » Tue Sep 11, 2007 7:00 pm

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Postby ichigo partygirl » Tue Sep 11, 2007 7:24 pm

It seems to me he got off lucky. Sure in comparison to other nations 23 days locked up was pretty harsh but by Japan standards he should be very happy he wasnt in there for longer and then deported. Im not saying i dont agree with defending a woman but the way he wrote it kind of made me not give a crap about him.
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Postby Midwinter » Tue Sep 11, 2007 7:48 pm

A couple of points:

1) I don't see what the problem is. He was confronted by a drunken biggot who got all up in his shit, his girl was scared, and he put the guy down. I would have done the same thing. The broken hand thing is no surprise what-so-ever, as hands can and often break when being used as a weapon. Hollywood myths be damned....

2) Wanting to kill the judge... well, be honest with yourselves now, who hasn't wanted to kill a local or three? How many times have you been confronted with a straight forward situation, only to have it twisted out of proportion by some inwardly, stubborn thinking. Thinking about this matter seriously, I have considered this option at least twice in the past month. Once when dealing with my boss who refuses to pay my holidays even when the law says she must. And a second time when dealing with an plumber who insisted that we pay for a hotel room while they refix the plumping in my bathroom which they didn't get right the first time.

Thinking such a thing is normal, doing it isn't. What's the big deal?

3) Re breaking the law while in jail, unless you've been there and had the experience of incarceration, who are you to comment? It's easy to pass judgement on someone while inhabiting a shiney happy place.
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Postby unkosando » Tue Sep 11, 2007 9:39 pm

I knew this guy when I used to live in Japan. He used to tend bar at the Dubliner's in Ikebukuro. He talked about getting into a few minor scuffles but he didn't strike me as overly violent. He has lived in Japan for several years now and he didn't seem to have a purpose other than banging J-girls. Maybe he is gotten jaded like so many gaijins do. He could have just snapped.

But still...it's one thing to defend yourself it's quite another to punch a "guy so hard and so many times that his nose was shattered and his monkey forehead ripped."

Oh and Charles... He is from the land down under if you were asking.
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Postby Greji » Tue Sep 11, 2007 9:54 pm

unkosando wrote:"....he didn't seem to have a purpose other than banging J-girls...."


Maybe I'm missing something here. Is there another purpose?
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Postby FG Lurker » Tue Sep 11, 2007 10:10 pm

gboothe wrote:Maybe I'm missing something here. Is there another purpose?

Well, some guys (Charles?) come here for the boys...
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Postby Iraira » Tue Sep 11, 2007 10:54 pm

gboothe wrote:Maybe I'm missing something here. Is there another purpose?
:confused:


I came here to see the beautiful temples and explore an ancient culture....in Kabukicho.
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Postby Mike Oxlong » Tue Sep 11, 2007 11:41 pm

As others have said - anyone steps up on you AND your woman, and they deserve to get beat down. I always enjoyed the moves some of my aikido buddies had, where it was hard to see they were busting wrists, elbows, and shoulder joints, and to see just who started what. Destroy the stupid git's arm & shoulder, and have it unclear as to who grabbed whom. Self-defense and Bob's yer uncle.
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Postby unkosando » Wed Sep 12, 2007 12:32 am

gboothe wrote:Maybe I'm missing something here. Is there another purpose?
:confused:


Touche.
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Postby kusai Jijii » Wed Sep 12, 2007 7:58 am

yes, its a law of nature that if someone crosses the line he usually cops his right whack. However, a second undeniable law is this:

IN JAPAN, ONCE THE COPS ARRIVE, THE FG IS IN THE SHIT REGARDLESS OF WHAT WENT DOWN

I'm sure we all have personal experiences (or know of such incidents) where the second above law is proven true. Common sense. Avoid doing things that will heighten your chances of socializing with the local constabulary, because, in the final analysis, its a no win situation. That story on stippy.com being a good (or bad) case in point.;)
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Postby Mike Oxlong » Wed Sep 12, 2007 8:09 am

Exactly KJ. That's why if you need to do what a man's gotta do sometimes, it's best to be able to do it without being obvious. Even the onlookers/witnesses are left unsure as to what happened..."i dunno officer, these two guys were standing face-to-face shouting at each other, one guy seemed to fall down, I didn't really see how...". In the meantime, you and your lady friend have walked calmly away, and are in no trouble with anyone anymore.
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Postby prolly » Wed Sep 12, 2007 11:05 pm

pretty much standard in any country; the locals always tend to get by better than the outsider.

while jailtime is always a hassle, crying over it in an op/ed page (and doing a bad job of it in the process) shows a lack of good judgement; no doubt the same lbad judgement he exercised to get himself in jail in the first place. gaijin or not, cops love to toss assholes in jail, and after reading his whiny column, I have my suspicions he behaved in just such a way when the cops got there, which didn't help matters.



kusai Jijii wrote:yes, its a law of nature that if someone crosses the line he usually cops his right whack. However, a second undeniable law is this:

IN JAPAN, ONCE THE COPS ARRIVE, THE FG IS IN THE SHIT REGARDLESS OF WHAT WENT DOWN
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