Fucked Touristas

[Charles]

[SIZE="3"]Superkiller Americano[/SIZE]

Vincent and Mary Kavanagh's nephew got married in Florence a couple of weeks ago, so they figured, what the hey, why not stop in Rome on the way?
They had never been there, they weren't getting any younger - Vincent's 69 and Mary's 63 - and they had always wanted to see la Citta` Eterna.
So there they were, at the foot of the Spanish Steps, taking in the splendor of the Piazza di Spagna, when a couple of Italian cops strolled over and started asking questions in halting English.
The Kavanaghs don't speak Italian, and the cops weren't exactly linguists. Finally, a woman working at a newspaper kiosk came over and offered to translate.
"They think this is you," the woman said, holding up a copy of Il Messaggero, an Italian newspaper that featured photographs of a couple who look like the fugitive gangster Whitey Bulger and his moll Cathy Greig. The photos were taken by a DEA agent who stumbled across the lookalikes on Sicily, and were distributed by the FBI. The headline included the words "Superkiller Americano."
"So, basically, they thought I resembled a guy who resembled Whitey Bulger," Vincent Kavanagh said.
This meant little to the Kavanaghs. Although they have local connections - a daughter went to Boston College, a niece lives in Dorchester - they live in New Jersey and had never heard of Whitey Bulger.
Neither had the Italian police until they read Il Messaggero that day.
"All of a sudden, we hear all these sirens," Vincent Kavanagh said.
Three police cars came screeching to a halt, surrounding the Kavanaghs. They were bundled into one of them...
... Around the same time that Kavanagh was getting the third-degree, police in another part of Italy lugged in a guy from Rhode Island who looked even less like the guy in the photo who looked like Whitey. Superkiller Americano sightings are apparently all the rage in Italy....more...

(yeah, I know it's not Japan-related, but it just goes to show, gaijin are fucked everywhere)

[L S]

If it had been me, I would have been pissed. But, if that had happened to my 71 yr old mom, she would be having the best time telling that story to everyone who would listen.

I liked the part about not being patted down for weapons until hours later...about what I would expect of Italian police.

[Charles]

If it had been me, I would have been pissed. But, if that had happened to my 71 yr old mom, she would be having the best time telling that story to everyone who would listen.

Yeah, that's exactly what happened.

The Kavanaghs demurred and headed straight for Florence, where they had the best story at the wedding.

I liked the part about not being patted down for weapons until hours later...about what I would expect of Italian police.

I would have insisted on an immediate, repeated frisking, as long as the Carabiniere looked like this:

[Mike Oxlong]

Sounds like the Italian fuzz have watched Hannibal too many times...Inspector Pazzi anyone?

[sublight]

If they want clues as to what Bulger might look like, why not distribute photos of his brother Billy?



Last seen presiding over the Massachusetts State Senate.

[L S]

I would have insisted on an immediate, repeated frisking, as long as the Carabiniere looked like this:

Italians do now how to enjoy things...even the police. Very nice legs...