Policeman Shoots Himself In Front Of Tokyo Station

[Mulboyne]

Mainichi: Cop dies after shooting self in head in police box
A Tokyo police officer died Wednesday after shooting himself in the head in an apparent suicide, police said. At around 9 a.m., the Metropolitan Police Department (MPD) received an emergency call from a passer-by reporting that a police officer was lying on the floor of a police box in front of JR Tokyo Station in Chiyoda-ku, bleeding from the head. The unconscious officer was rushed to a hospital where he later died. He has been identified as Yasumasa Onishi, 32, a sergeant with Marunouchi Police Station who was transferred to the police box on Thursday last week. Onishi was holding a gun when he was found collapsed, leading MPD investigators to suspect that he shot himself in the head in a bid to commit suicide.

[Captain Japan]

[Samurai_Jerk]

It's been a tough week for the cops...
Cop commits suicide in police box
Mainichi

Holy shit! Why would you shoot yourself in the gut? Trying to make your last minutes as painful as possible?

[Buraku]

Holy shit! Why would you shoot yourself in the gut? Trying to make your last minutes as painful as possible?

Yes a modern weapon for a traditional Japanese way of thinking
think how the older generations of Japanese would disembowel themself in seppuku

[succubusqueen]

I've heard of some cases that people who shoot themselves in the head....well sometimes miss. And well they end up disabled (vegetable likea) instead of dead.

[xenomorph42]

Screw all that! He got lucky...if you really wanna do yourself in, but seriously good, just jump in front of a Shinkasen, guaranteed; you will be dead...little messy, but your odds coming out of that one alive, zero.

[Captain Japan]

[Iraira]

[quote="xenomorph42"]Screw all that! He got lucky...if you really wanna do yourself in, but seriously good, just jump in front of a Shinkasen, guaranteed]

Yeah, it's also a great way to inconvenience as many people as possible, as people on the train have to wait while they pick up your remains with a mop. Sorry, I'm just being insensitive.

[xenomorph42]

Yeah, it's also a great way to inconvenience as many people as possible, as people on the train have to wait while they pick up your remains with a mop. Sorry, I'm just being insensitive.

Well, Mr. smartypants, got any better ways of doing it(without inconveniencing someone?) Mind you, once I am dead, there is that thing of who really cares, gives people an excuse to take the day off or at least, gaze upon the road kill.

[succubusqueen]

Well someone has to pick up the body...or whatever is left of it!
Roadkill, gunshot, train wreck, jumper, floater...whatever...it requires people to pick up the body and get an autopsy...ooops....true in Japan you dont always get one of those!:confused:

[Iraira]

Well, Mr. smartypants, got any better ways of doing it(without inconveniencing someone?) Mind you, once I am dead, there is that thing of who really cares, gives people an excuse to take the day off or at least, gaze upon the road kill.

Oh, I sense a challenge. Soon you will feel the sting of my Kunf Fu Grip, and if you pay me enough, you can feel the sting for another 5 minutes....but I digress....
1) Jumping into an active volcano.
2) A pair of concrete slippers, the Marianas Trench, a small step for man, no mess for mankind.
3) Sell handcrafted figures of Muhammad in Mecca during Ramadan....I guarantee there will be no mess for anyone to clean up.

There's 3 off of the top of my head or from the depths of my bowels...really, who can tell the difference?

[ttjereth]

apparent suicide

????????????????????????????????????

[emperor]

I've heard of some cases that people who shoot themselves in the head....well sometimes miss.

you shot yourself?

[YT]HnBJBaHbwak[/YT]

[emperor]

apparent suicide

????????????????????????????????????

They're getting real good at making it look like an accident these days

[emperor]

Well, Mr. smartypants, got any better ways of doing it(without inconveniencing someone?)

Volunteer to clear anti-personnel mines & wear a beanie-hat soaked in nitroglycerin

[ttjereth]

Volunteer to clear anti-personnel mines & wear a beanie-hat soaked in nitroglycerin

[Iraira]

Dude, I got fired after pulling that prank on Bob (R.I.P.). Now, I'm not allowed within 30 meters of even a sparkler.

[hundefar]

sparkler.

is that some weird slang for penis?

[Iraira]

is that some weird slang for penis?

No, it's that cute little fireworks thingie that even a newborn can play with out hurting themselves....but I do like to refer to my penis as the Roman Candle, but only when we are playing "Julius Caesar and the captured Eqyptian slave". Gf looks good in a toga and I don't look so good serving her grapes.

[hundefar]

No, it's that cute little fireworks thingie that even a newborn can play with out hurting themselves....but I do like to refer to my penis as the Roman Candle, but only when we are playing "Julius Caesar and the captured Eqyptian slave". Gf looks good in a toga and I don't look so good serving her grapes.

Damn..mine is more like a sparkler

[Mulboyne]

The Asahi reports (Japanese) that papers are being sent to prosecutors on the basis that the dead policeman discharged a handgun in a public place. This charge has not been brought against other police who have shot themselves with the koban door closed but prosecutors want to press a charge here in order to stress the importance of not offing yourself in such a high profile location. Ironically, the law in question was designed to be used against mobsters. It's unlikely the officer will be offering a defence.

[Iraira]

The Asahi reports

The article leaves me with one question: Will the deceased be hiring Johnnie Cochran to defend him in court?

[Greji]

The article leaves me with one question: Will the deceased be hiring Johnnie Cochran to defend him in court?

"If the glove don't fit, you gotta acquit!"

[Iraira]

"If the glove don't fit, you gotta acquit!"

I believe that Michael Jackson said the same thing in court regarding the accusations of anal probing.

[Charles]

The article leaves me with one question: Will the deceased be hiring Johnnie Cochran to defend him in court?

That's an appropriate choice of attorney, since Cochran is dead too.

[American Oyaji]

That's an appropriate choice of attorney, since Cochran is dead too.

It may be macabre, but I LOL'd

[Mulboyne]

[Mulboyne]

[pheyton]

It's sad that anyone has to die, but better that they kill themselves than go on a rampage and take as many down with them before they die.

[kurohinge1]

On-duty officer apparently shoots himself at Tokyo police station

. . . Orihara apparently lost several traffic violation tickets on Sunday and was looking for them, but they have not been found, police said.

When I lose something, I like to retrace my steps, physically or mentally, and I almost always find the object along that path, somewhere. It has never occurred to me, until now, that if I ever fail in that task, I should SHOOT MYSELF IN THE HEAD.

Now that I know, I'd better purchase a firearm, in case I can't find the next thing I may lose - like my marbles.