Conspiracy Theories

[AML]

So in my ten years in Japan ive come to notice some weird shit that doesnt quite fit.

Feel free to add to the list

1: Eggs

They sell them in packs of 6. (Half a dozen)

But for some reason they dont sell them in packs of 12 (full dozen)

Instead we only get 10... Where are my other 2 eggs?

Check your refrigerators and you will see that there is only space for....dun dun DUN... 10 eggs (not 12 like normal western fridges)

Its an egg conspiracy between the people who produce the eggs and the people who make the fridges to rip us off for 2 eggs...

2: Washing machines. Not really conspiracy, but just plain fucking weird.

TEN years and they still dont make machines that can wash clothes with HOT water.

And no I will never use bath water to wash my clothes. That just makes me sick.

However! if you go to a coin laundry (laundromat) all the machines there use... dun dun DUN.... hot water!!!

So its not like its an unknown concept...

[IparryU]

So in my ten years in Japan ive come to notice some weird shit that doesnt quite fit.

Feel free to add to the list

1: Eggs

They sell them in packs of 6. (Half a dozen)

But for some reason they dont sell them in packs of 12 (full dozen)

Instead we only get 10... Where are my other 2 eggs?

Check your refrigerators and you will see that there is only space for....dun dun DUN... 10 eggs (not 12 like normal western fridges)

Its an egg conspiracy between the people who produce the eggs and the people who make the fridges to rip us off for 2 eggs...

2: Washing machines. Not really conspiracy, but just plain fucking weird.

TEN years and they still dont make machines that can wash clothes with HOT water.

And no I will never use bath water to wash my clothes. That just makes me sick.

However! if you go to a coin laundry (laundromat) all the machines there use... dun dun DUN.... hot water!!!

So its not like its an unknown concept...

sorta like in america where they have packs of 8 hotdogs but only sell hot dog buns in packs of 6 or 12... WTF they want you to get 24 fucking hotdogs and hotdog buns to get a goddamn match... WTF

but you have really clear points for the washing machine... my wife tells me that they dont like to use dryers cause it is bad for your cloaths.. even worst, my mother in law asked me if we have cloths hangers in the US yet... i was about to ask her if japanese people pasted the primitive mind stage yet.

[wuchan]

So in my ten years in Japan ive come to notice some weird shit that doesnt quite fit.

Feel free to add to the list

1: Eggs

They sell them in packs of 6. (Half a dozen)

But for some reason they dont sell them in packs of 12 (full dozen)

Instead we only get 10... Where are my other 2 eggs?

Check your refrigerators and you will see that there is only space for....dun dun DUN... 10 eggs (not 12 like normal western fridges)

Its an egg conspiracy between the people who produce the eggs and the people who make the fridges to rip us off for 2 eggs...

2: Washing machines. Not really conspiracy, but just plain fucking weird.

TEN years and they still dont make machines that can wash clothes with HOT water.

And no I will never use bath water to wash my clothes. That just makes me sick.

However! if you go to a coin laundry (laundromat) all the machines there use... dun dun DUN.... hot water!!!

So its not like its an unknown concept...

1: you answered the question yourself. Many japanese fridges are small and only have ten egg spots. Japanese people are very picky about fit, two extra eggs may cause a complaint.

2: Even the most modern japanese houses usually don't have full time hot running water. In my house the system needs to be turned on before it will produce hot water. If I leave it on my gas bill doubles.

[AML]

1: you answered the question yourself. Many japanese fridges are small and only have ten egg spots. Japanese people are very picky about fit, two extra eggs may cause a complaint.

2: Even the most modern japanese houses usually don't have full time hot running water. In my house the system needs to be turned on before it will produce hot water. If I leave it on my gas bill doubles.

LOL. Getting two free extra eggs would make people angry?

Lets face it, two extra eggs isnt going to change the size of a fridge...

And fair point about older housing not having full time hot water. But for those of us who have hot water, please give us the option!!

How hard could it be for companies to make one washing machine?

Also there is another way. Machines that come with built in boilers. They take cold water in, and heat it up to the desired temp.

Simple. And no excuse.

[GomiGirl]

There is no need to use hot water on clothes with modern detergents. If you have a stain that needs to be soaked in hot water and special detergent (eg an oily stain) then soak it separately before you wash it. There is no need for normal general washing to be done in hot water.

This is why..

In the "olden days" there used to be twin tubs where you hat hot water and detergent in one tub and reused it for 3-4 wash cycles. Then you rinsed the load in cold water (the other tub) and spin dry. The hot water was put in manually.

But as I said, modern detergents don't need hot water to be effective.

/ chemistry lesson

[kalebb1999]

ha ha ha.... my j-wife here in the states now some 7+ years and still doesn't use hot water when washing clothes..... now I understand.... thanks FG for this site.. Im learning much into the J-mind as I read through your blogs.. got me hooked...

[Coligny]

There is no need to use hot water on clothes with modern detergents. If you have a stain that needs to be soaked in hot water and special detergent (eg an oily stain) then soak it separately before you wash it. There is no need for normal general washing to be done in hot water.

This is why..

In the "olden days" there used to be twin tubs where you hat hot water and detergent in one tub and reused it for 3-4 wash cycles. Then you rinsed the load in cold water (the other tub) and spin dry. The hot water was put in manually.

But as I said, modern detergents don't need hot water to be effective.

/ chemistry lesson

Dood... In cold water grease become hard, and anything short of a flamethrower will fail to clear it.... Maybe some military grade chemical can work in cold water, but you aint gettin' any at the supaa'... So meanwhile, give me a hot water washing masheen anytime... Dem' french one even boil your stuffy stuff to clean white sterile mess...

(still have some milk chokluts stains that will never leave... damn babies and their explosiv vomiting...)

[Samurai_Jerk]

TEN years and they still dont make machines that can wash clothes with HOT water.

Not true. I bought an expensive front loading (AKA drum-shiki) washer-drier that has a hot water setting. The water is heated by the machine itself so it doesn't matter if you have a hot water conntection for the machine. The washing machine still sucks compared to the ones in the US though.

One thing I have noticed is that every coin laundry I've been to in Japan uses a US brand like Wirlpool. I guess the pros know Japanese washers suck.

[wuchan]

LOL. Getting two free extra eggs would make people angry?

Lets face it, two extra eggs isnt going to change the size of a fridge...

And you have been here for ten years????

[Greji]

There is no need to use hot water on clothes with modern detergents. If you have a stain that needs to be soaked in hot water and special detergent (eg an oily stain) then soak it separately before you wash it.

You wash your clothes?

[Coligny]

You wash your clothes?

Not everybody got bitches and hoe's in everypart of the Island to do their laundry...

Damn... I only got a 30yo washing machine dating back from the opening of the clinic... Most plastic parts literally fall to dust (vampire in daylight style) when you bump them...

[AML]

Here's another one!

Hotels in Japan. (western style)

In ten years I have yet to find a hotel that offers a double room. (ie one double bed or bigger)

Its always a twin here. Even if the beds are big, still a twin.

Its like no one wants japanese couples to sleep together....
(no wonder the population is decreasing!)

Only place ive ever found a proper double room is in a love hotel...

But try staying in a love hotel without feeling seedy.

After all we associate love hotels with cheating and so on. well, at least i do...

[Yokohammer]

After all we associate love hotels with cheating and so on. well, at least i do...

Not at all! Well ... not entirely.
Where else are mom and dad going to have a few hours of wild uninhibited yee-har with grandma and grandpa and the kidlets clogging up the 2DK that serves as "home"? And of course there are the young couples who don't have a home of their own and need a place to let it all hang out. And then ... yeah, OK ... there are the "ilicit" relationships.

What the heck. Take the wife or GF for a change of scenery. She'll love it! Just don't take her to the same place you use for the other shenanigans.

[FG Lurker]

Hotels in Japan. (western style)

In ten years I have yet to find a hotel that offers a double room. (ie one double bed or bigger)

Depends on the hotel. Business hotels have mostly twin rooms as a lot of the time two (male) business associates share a room for the night. Most business hotels do have a few proper double rooms but you'll need to reserve in advance if you want one.

[FG Lurker]

1: Eggs

They sell them in packs of 6. (Half a dozen)

But for some reason they dont sell them in packs of 12 (full dozen)

Instead we only get 10... Where are my other 2 eggs?

You're paying per egg anyway so what's the difference? If they put 12 in a package they'd just increase the price enough to cover the additional cost of the eggs and the additional weight/space for shipping.

2: Washing machines. Not really conspiracy, but just plain fucking weird.

TEN years and they still dont make machines that can wash clothes with HOT water.

Japanese houses don't have hot water taps for washing machines so it's a chicken and egg problem. If manufacturers produced washing machines that could use hot water people wouldn't buy them as there are no hot water taps for washing machines. Likewise people don't put hot water taps near their washing machines as washing machines don't use hot water.

My wife has a front-loading Panasonic washing machine that makes its own hot water using its built-in heat pump. It also doubles as a dryer that works pretty well, as long as you don't over-stuff it.

And no I will never use bath water to wash my clothes. That just makes me sick.

If you bathe the Japanese way I don't see any problem with it. You wash before you get in the bath and then soak your clean body in the hot bath water. The water is basically clean when you finish and certainly WAY cleaner than your dirty laundry. Washing machines that use bath water generally only use it for the wash cycle and switch to fresh water for rinsing.

[Mulboyne]

...Where else are mom and dad going to have a few hours of wild uninhibited yee-har with grandma and grandpa...

I really should read to the end of a sentence before conjuring up an image.

[Coligny]

But try staying in a love hotel without feeling seedy.

After all we associate love hotels with cheating and so on. well, at least i do...

Nope... Love Hotel remind us of... Car breakdowns... back in the days of the krauter, a design flaw got the rain water clogged in the wiper engine bay... therefore... after too much rain the shield wiper were just stopping to function... Of course, no problem on sunny days... So once... under a typhoon rainstorm, with wipers out of orders... by night... the only place to stop safely was a love hotel...

[Yokohammer]

I really should read to the end of a sentence before conjuring up an image.

Sorry about that. Hope I didn't ruin your cocktail hour.
I saw the ambiguity as I was writing it, but was just too lazy to do anything about it ... besides, I figured the idea might appeal to Greji.

[Catoneinutica]

Here's another one!

Hotels in Japan. (western style)

In ten years I have yet to find a hotel that offers a double room. (ie one double bed or bigger)

Its always a twin here. Even if the beds are big, still a twin.

Its like no one wants japanese couples to sleep together....
(no wonder the population is decreasing!)

Only place ive ever found a proper double room is in a love hotel...

But try staying in a love hotel without feeling seedy.

After all we associate love hotels with cheating and so on. well, at least i do...

Natsuo Kirino's Grotesque has a character who did a stint working as a "chambermaid" at a love hotel. That has to be one of the most loathsome jobs ever: no tips, and you have to spend your shift interacting with other people's cum, vaginal secretions, and the occasional dollop of urine and faeces. But mostly cum.

-catone
-yeah, I know it'd be just the ticket for some of you fellas...

[Coligny]

Natsuo Kirino's Grotesque has a character who did a stint working as a "chambermaid" at a love hotel. That has to be one of the most loathsome jobs ever: no tips, and you have to spend your shift interacting with other people's cum, vaginal secretions, and the occasional dollop of urine and faeces. But mostly cum.

-catone
-yeah, I know it'd be just the ticket for some of you fellas...

Just in case, for a friend of mine who asked, where do we send resume ?

[Greji]

[quote="Yokohammer"]I figured the idea might appeal to Greji. ]
That depends. Do I gotta do grandpa, or grandma, or would it be a 3P?

[legion]

I really should read to the end of a sentence before conjuring up an image.

Two guys are sat in a pub together when one turns to the other and says "i fucked your mum last night. we did everything. i fucked her doggy, missionary and reverse cowgirl, then i licked her bumhole while she fingered mine, then she gave me a tit wank whilst sucking my cock and i spunked all over her face." The other guy puts down his pint and says. "Lets go home dad, i think you've had enough."

[AML]

Heres another hotel related one.

Every hotel ive ever stayed in, from Hokkaido to Okinawa, that offered a breakfast "Viking Tabehodai" (all you can eat buffet), always serve the EXACT same food!

What is up with that? Do all the hotel managers in Japan meet up and agree to serve the exact same breakfast menu all over the country?

Its not just the food itself. Its the preparation too!

I can understand if its in a few hotels in say, Tokyo. Or Yokohama.

But its literally, from Hokkaido to Okinawa!

Im not bitching as I kinda like the food. But come on!

[Screwed-down Hairdo]

AML, you've got a thing about Japanese hotels....You complained about no double rooms and now the fucking buffets...
Mate, you're in trouble if your expecting a buffet to be anything but shite...

[AML]

AML, you've got a thing about Japanese hotels....You complained about no double rooms and now the fucking buffets...
Mate, you're in trouble if your expecting a buffet to be anything but shite...

Just came back from a hotel-stay-trip!


Had a great time! Fuji looks amazing this time of year



View from the hotel

[Coligny]

AML, you've got a thing about Japanese hotels....You complained about no double rooms and now the fucking buffets...
Mate, you're in trouble if your expecting a buffet to be anything but shite...

The second Hotel we stay around the lake around Noboribetsu, somewhere in Hokkaido around a bit far from the airport (sorry, I don't brain when the car GPS do the nav for me...). Was quite good, they even had a steak and french fries counter... alas no cheezeburger... (and in Hokkaido, no Mc Do in a 100km radius, which is your average distance from the first combini... The surface of the moon seems more lively and with less volcano activity... But strangely enough... I got used instantely to this emptyness... drivers that do the speed limits, rabid locals that appear to be more dangerous than the fauna, even if said fauna is composed from fox on lucky days and hungry bears on not so lucky ones... or even Azim cousin's homosexual bears on really shitty ones (and you know, when Azim is behind it's already too late))

[legion]

Just came back from a hotel-stay-trip!


Had a great time! Fuji looks amazing this time of year

The Japanese love Mt Fuji so much they string telegraph wires across every view of it.

[BigInJapan]

The Japanese love Mt Fuji so much they string telegraph wires across every view of it.

Crikey, next thing you know they'll be obscuring the view of Mt. Fuji with pollution from those newfangled steam locomotives, and horseless carriages...