Let me get this straight......

[hanasims]

I met my Japanese girlfriend in America. We have been together for about 6 years. We graduated college together and now I am working and she is going to grad school. I think it would be a good experience for both of us to live in Japan for awhile. She says she misses Japan but doesn't think this is a good idea. I don't understand. She will have a Masters degree and she can speak fluent english, still, she thinks that she can make more money in America. What do you guys think?

[ramchop]

What do you guys think?

She's ashamed of you and doesn't want her old friends/family to see how far she has lowered her standards.

[Taro Toporific]

I...She says she misses Japan but doesn't think this is a good idea. I don't understand. She will have a Masters degree and she can speak fluent english, still, she thinks that she can make more money in America. What do you guys think?

Trust her; she's right no doubt.
But...for the sake of discussion: What "kind" of Masters degree?

[hanasims]

I have already met her family, but nice try. Try to keep up with the rest of us. If you find you cannot just ask for some help.

[hanasims]

Her masters degree is in Microbiology

[Taro Toporific]

Her masters degree is in Microbiology

Damn. Of course she'll make more money in the States. This AIN'T even a farquing question!!! She can get a real job in an American bio-tech company, work a couple of years and THEN get transfered on the butt-screaming 100 bigillion dollar "Package" and live better than most Japanese corporate directors. Cum to think of it, native Japanese with masters degree in Microbiology is a sure-thing/fast-track to become an ex-pat corporate director here in Japan. That girl is GOLD (don't even think about her "hot" friends).

[GomiGirl]

Her masters degree is in Microbiology

Damn. Of course she'll make more money in the States. This AIN'T even a farquing question!!! She can get a real job in an American bio-tech company, work a couple of years and THEN get transfered on the butt-screaming 100 bigillion dollar "Package" and live better than most Japanese corporate directors. Cum to think of it, native Japanese with masters degree in Microbiology is a sure-thing/fast-track to become an ex-pat corporate director here in Japan. That girl is GOLD (don't even think about her "hot" friends).

Second the opinion of Taro..

Also, most of the tech companies in Japan are in the middle of nowhere in tech villages with very little else other than labs. Pretty dull place to hang out.

Wait until she has worked in a big bio-tech company and take the expat package to Japan at 1.5 gazillion a year!!

[Big Booger]

Pros of America:
Clean air
clean water
clean hygiene
no concrete up your ass
no overflashing signs every 2 square feet
not very much blatant racism
air conditioning that works
real food
free refills
buffets galore
large roads, large cars
comfortable couches
good doctors
no smoking places
no one stares *they are too scared you have a gun
diversity


Pros of Japan:
Natto
stinky hot weather
bad breath
no floride in the water
futon for comfort
the population is 99.9% Japanese
close relations to neighbors (they can even hear you boinking at night)
mattsuris
yatai that cause shoulder burns
squatter shitters
smoking nearly everywhere
taking off shoes everywhere
young girls who sleep with you for gucci bags
ketai fevers (improves thumb coordination)
high prices (what better way to spend your money)
toll roads ( $20-$40 to cross Akashi Bridge: 1 way)
bumper to bumper traffic
psychos on trains (entertainment effect), nothing like a guy beating his head against the rail of a train seat)
it's safe
it's quiet in some places.. like funerals
etc...

This list could go on and on and on... stay in the US, do yourself a favor. In terms of visiting Japan, I'd stick to the visit.. it's one thing to visit another thing all together to live here. Don't wreck your career or hers by coming here. The economy is shit right now, and job hunting is fiercely competitive, unless you teach English..

Make Japan your holiday destination and the US your home. I wish I had that opportunity.. but me wife forced me into this fucked gaijin conundrum.

But to be fare, living in Japan has some merit. YOu can learn about being a minority, you can jump head first into Japanese culture and language, and you can experience life in a foreign country. My experiences have learned me well. Glad I came, but I don't recommend this route to anyone.

[AssKissinger]

She's afraid you'll start riding every yellow cab you can get into. And you probably will, most gaijins do.

[Video-Link Japan]

Hanasims;

Taro's prolly right.. I'm guessing she could get further/faster at 1st in the U.S and after a few years make a move (if you still want to transfer) with whatever company gig she lands there.. being j-native and bi-lingual will sure help. One thought is by all accounts the current changes taking place here are at least starting to show alot more interest in knowledge based economy (Micro-Biology Nano-Tech etc.) since the Toyota's and Panasonic's have moved production to China, Korea and Taiwan.. so her career choice and timing seems like there could be some pretty good futures.

As for Big Boges <rant> well.. it reeks of sour grapes so take with a couple grains (kilos) of salt..!! Have you ever visited Japan for any length of time?!? I think living here - or anywhere for that matter - happily, depends as much or more on the person than the place..!!

Good Luck..!!

[ramchop]

I met my Japanese girlfriend in America. We have been together for about 6 years.

That's about 1/4 of her life in America, maybe quite a bit more. She's not really Japanese anymore (just like Taro's not really American :P ). She probably feels more at home in America than she would in Japan.

And don't think she didn't notice the way you looked at her friends. Women have a sixth sense in that regard, they ALWAYS notice. What varies is the way they deal with it: sulk, shout, hit, try to ignore, bottle it up... etc.

[GomiGirl]

And don't think she didn't notice the way you looked at her friends. Women have a sixth sense in that regard, they ALWAYS notice. What varies is the way they deal with it: sulk, shout, hit, try to ignore, bottle it up... etc.

Yes - but it is pretty skuzzy behaviour to try it on her friends just to see how far he can get with them before he pisses off his girlfriend.

NIIICE guy!!!

Why don't you just ask her if it is OK for you to flirt - she might be open to an "Open" relationship and then you can tomcat without sneaking around.. but then perhaps it is the sneaking around that is all part of the thrill??

[Big Booger]

As for Big Boges <rant> well.. it reeks of sour grapes so take with a couple grains (kilos) of salt..!! Have you ever visited Japan for any length of time?!? I think living here - or anywhere for that matter - happily, depends as much or more on the person than the place..!!

Yeah But I did sum it up at the end that there are some good points to living here, I was certainly serious about learning the culture and language.. and festivals here are nice. Japan has more of a community atmosphere compared to the states. I can walk my dog at dusk without worry.. other than dying from the pollution LMAO..

I just don't recommend Japan to a person who is debating it. Before I came here, I had no debate. I was gungho all the way get your feet wet, slap me some hashi, I am ready to slurp, take my shoes off, get naked with other men in an onsen, kind of mentality..

Now, that I can look back, with all I have learned I can say it is not so bad, but if you have to ask if you should come here, maybe you shouldn't.

That is all goodbye. That and Japan has enough horn dog American loosers chasing tail, and polluting the goodwill of Japan.

[kamome]

I second BB completely. Don't farkin' come here if you have a choice. Let her do her thing in the US, make her money, and then maybe come here on a limited package. Hell, maybe you can stay home and let her go to work!

[Video-Link Japan]

Booger:

Cool.. actually thats why I asked if he had never been before.. it would make sense to me for any-one interested to check it out 1st before making the 'big move'..!!! Otherwise (at least for me) like most things in life there's a pretty hefty does of ying-yang here. Sure some things suck.. like the crowded trains (psychos or not) and others are better.. like the FOOD (except Natto.. +_+) So.. that was my point, 'try before you buy' and 'differant strokes for differant folks' (tough in cheek of course..!!)

[Taro Toporific]

So.. that was my point, 'try before you buy' and 'differant strokes for differant folks' (tough in cheek of course..!!)

The problem is most of the "different stroking different folks" are "Japan Damp Dreamers(tm)".

You cannot believe the 100s of resumes I've reviewed over the years for FG wannnabes looking for a job: most were still damp-n-sticky after a week in the mail.

[Big Booger]

spot on VLJ. I mean hell it is worth it to come and visit, stay if you enjoy it, go back if not. I agree with that try before you buy. Always leave yourself a back exit before coming.

I think also it depends on where at in Japan you go. Tokyo is a far different experience compared to say some little inaka village on the outskirts of BFE.



I say if you do come, find a counselor, especially if you are going to be here long term. Make friends, go out, site see, enjoy Japan. Don't come here under the pretense of getting some fluffy muffin and rip roaring yourself from Kinki to Kanto. That gets old fairly quickly and can get you in some deep doo doo.

[Taro Toporific]

double post

[Taro Toporific]

I mean hell it is worth it to come and visit, stay if you enjoy it, go back if not. I agree with that try before you buy. Always leave yourself a back exit before coming.

Hey, come on a super-slacker research fellowship at Tsukuba Dai for 6 months. Hell, half the EU is sucking on the J-research tittie there and doing next to nothing. If you two had some real hot research idea, these super-slacker fellowships are just the meal ticket. Problem is, your girl sounds way too smart and motivated to waste away in the braindead J-research environment (and you should be too).

[jim katta]

to the topic starter: dude, slap handcuffs on her and don't let her go. she's a winner on paper. try gomi's suggestion, never know, maybe she'll let you swing a bit.


booger:
I'm actually among those who have been to japan many times, and am in the middle of debating a move to live there (not for horn dog chasing tail reasons). do you think moving to japan is a career killer? yes, I agree with video link that everyone makes their own bed, but I'm looking for some opinion here. is it really that bad long-term?

gomi: I've enjoyed a lot of your posts, so I'd appreciate your opinion on this as well since you seem to have made a good go of it. do you regret your decision to stay long term?

[Andocrates]

I'm actually among those who have been to japan many times, and am in the middle of debating a move to live there (not for horn dog chasing tail reasons). do you think moving to japan is a career killer?

We are all just marking time anyway, what's so great about living in America, forever. Go for it, even if you hate it and come running back the experience will always be there.

[GomiGirl]

gomi: I've enjoyed a lot of your posts, so I'd appreciate your opinion on this as well since you seem to have made a good go of it. do you regret your decision to stay long term?

Why thank you Jim...

I am just doing the best I can. I am in a fortunate position in that my family are also here - brother and parents. Sunday night roast dinners make a world of difference. It really feels normal and I don't feel like I am just marking time. I haven't ruled out moving away from Japan at some stage but after the delights of Tokyo I think that any place else will pale into insignificance.

Also, I have great friends whe really enjoy getting together and doing fun things and I also have a non-work life with things like Karate that give balance to my very stressful job.

But personally I am pretty mellow and can tolerate most people and things. I rarely get angry and just deal with things as they arrive.. I do get frustrated with certain aspects but I have always been somebody who can find a solution to most things.

I really think that in most cases you take your immediate environment with you where-ever you go. So if you are the type of person who gets uptight about things then you will also get uptight in Japan but the difference is your usual frame of reference (at home) and support mechanisms are not there which just amplifies your frustration. This is true if you move to a new city or a new country - just when you move to a country where the language is not your native one, you are compounding the situation.

But all in all whether you believe you will succeed or fail - in both cases you will be correct. It is all about attitude.

[Big Booger]

I'm actually among those who have been to japan many times, and am in the middle of debating a move to live there (not for horn dog chasing tail reasons). do you think moving to japan is a career killer?

We are all just marking time anyway, what's so great about living in America, forever. Go for it, even if you hate it and come running back the experience will always be there.

Jim,
Andocrates finally gave some words worth taking a second look at on here.. just pulling your pud Ando.

I think, for a short time, living in Japan is not a career killer. I think in fact, in the short term it is a great additive to a resume. However, if you are concerned solely with your career and advancment, again depending on the field, I think Japan is not the place for you longterm.

Taro, Gomi et al.. are the exception, not the rule. They have made Japan their semi-perm to permanent home. And I think they are doing quite well.

I would say this, if you are interested in education, especially teaching English as a foreign language, Japan is the spot for you. Jobs in that field are plentiful. If you are into marketing, advertising, mass comm, or any similar field, I'd say you have a shot if your Japanese is up to par, and you are wanting to live in a metropolitan area like Tokyo, Osaka, Kobe, etc..

The economy in Japan is not what it was 10 years ago, and I really wonder if it ever will be. That said Japanese even have a hard time finding a job here. Unless you specialize in something that Japanese cannot provide for themselves, like English education, Rob Pongi style entertainment, or are a highly skilled, highly qualified worker in a specific area with great Japanese skills, your chances of landing a great job here are slim.

Not to put a downer on those wanting to come here. I take a realistic look at the situation as I see it. Of course where I live is far different from Tokyo, so if Tokyo is your destination, ask a Tokyo FG. They can offer more on that specific region. But from what I've seen, the job market is not pretty, even in the states, with 9 million unemployed, things are not so peachy.

If you just want to experience Japan and are not looking for a career boost, come over as a walking tape recorder, do your year or two of service, and then go back home with a great experience under your belt. Gomi hit on the head with her statement about attitude. It is everything here. You either take it with a grain of salt, or you pick the bag of salt and try to shake it in their faces... Or you drop the salt and run like hell back to wherever you came from. LMAO...

I think most of us who have been here 2+ years, are here because we have good or adaptable attitudes, though by reading some comments you'd think we hate this place, which we do, but something is keeping us here. I like Japan, that is why I am here. I also hate Japan, that is why I post on this forum.


Just my two cents and a bottle of rum.

[kamome]

Jim Katta:

I never fail to throw my two cents in on this topic. I have said it before many times: coming to Japan is a career killer, unless you plan on pursuing a job that is viable in Japan. I think those in the arts, in education, and in computing/tech can start a career here and it would not be a killer. Those in other professional fields may suffer if they start their career here, even if their J-language skills are up to snuff. If you have prior experience in the States in your profession, then you can make a good living on a limited-term expat package in Japan. But always be sure you can get back to your company in the States. It's tough to go back if you don't have the connection in the US already established.

Trust me, I say this from experience.

[jim katta]

mucho thanks to gomi, booger, and kamome. great perspectives that have helped me. I've been to tokyo many times, and even lived for a very very short time, but I knew that nothing really beats the experience of people who have really lived in japan for a few years. I have my own small company here in nyc, and would bring that service to tokyo, but I'm not cocky enough to expect that it would just go smoothly, so I'm keeping the option of working for others in my sights. thanks for the specifics on the industries that a gaijin can work in japan (i.e. arts, educations, mass comm., etc.). that's exactly the kind of stuff I was trying to glean. I've got a pretty nice u.s. resume and can land a job in the u.s. if I wanted to work for someone else, so I'm just imagining a worst case scenario where I go to japan, completely get burnt, and then return to the u.s. of course I'm more optimistic than that and have a very proactive and postive attitude in the face of adversity, but a lot of that comes from my habit of always having a strong plan b and c to give me the courage to dive into plan 'a' with full force. you guys have helped me with my plan b and c, mucho domo (my impression of bush speaking japanese).

[kamome]

Jim,

Since you have your own company, I should have mentioned that entrepreneurship is another good way to go in Japan. GG would know a lot more about that than me, though. In general, it's better to be your own boss-or to have a foreign boss-than to have a Japanese boss (again, I speak from experience).

The problem is, as you said, that the worst case scenario is setting up shop here only to lose the business because of the bad economy or whatever, and then have to relocate to the US without any connections. Assuming you have an abundance of cash, that may not be a problem. But then again you probably would have cash flow problems after setting up the biz and all that.

I'm talking with limited knowledge about entrepreneurship, so I would also be interested to hear what other FGs say.