If J-E Translation were rocket science.

[matsuki]

told this to my wife and in-laws... everyone but my wife just couldn't understand why...

Maybe the daily rants I hear about how "foreigners just don't get Japan" and how unique Japan is.

[Screwed-down Hairdo]

Maybe the daily rants I hear about how "foreigners just don't get Japan" and how unique Japan is.

Eureka! You just made me realize what it is....Engrish must remain that way so the foreigners can never get Japan and Japan will remain truly unique. It's one of those shifty national policies to make cushy jobs for bureaucrats.

Fuck an economy up the shitter, a public debt ratio trailing only thriving Zimbabwe, the world's oldest population and no pensions payable, no kids being born, jerrybuilt nuclear reactors that ooze toxic waste, internal religious crackpot terrorists or deadly natural disasters striking at reasonable intervals, we Japanese have traits that can only be developed through four distinct seasons and the rest we won't tell you about because we want to be inscrutable.

Mind you, I do find it hard to "get" a cuntry where the ideal "woman" is actually a 12-year-old girl wearing cat's ears, glasses, a maid's outfit and 44-inch bust and only exists virtually so she will obey your every command and there's no need to try and have a decent conversation.

[matsuki]

we Japanese

exxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxactly

[IparryU]

Maybe the daily rants I hear about how "foreigners just don't get Japan" and how unique Japan is.

exactly.

I got back from the US last month from my cousins funeral... despite that I went and had some fun in the sun. I was in Sacramento... fuggin 103F out there.

So I get back and my FIL said that the kids should wear hats cause it was hot... I told him it was not that hot and they dont need hats as wherever we go has spots of shade every 4 meters or so. He said because that the sun constantly on your head is bad...

I told him that I just got back from Cali... and it was like 40C there and no one wears hats because it would fug up their tan. I left out the comparison of people fucked up in the head cause I would have to had explain that Americans are fucked up cause of drugs.. not DNA.

He then proceeded to tell me that the sun in Japan is a bit different and they should wear hats... My MIL got snobby and said that I dont have to put hats on them and my wife just tried to get me out of their house so I wouldn't start laughing at them.

I then told this to my grandma this morning on skype... she laughed and said, "Well... the sun wont do nothing that would give you brain damage... just skin cancer... now put a damn hat on 'em so they dont get no skin cancer."

Now if my mom were to hear some of the bullshit that they say, she would start laughing her ass off like I do. Us cuntry folk don take kind to nonedhat fancyjappyscientificy buushit.

Fuck an economy up the shitter, a public debt ratio trailing only thriving Zimbabwe, the world's oldest population and no pensions payable, no kids being born, jerrybuilt nuclear reactors that ooze toxic waste, internal religious crackpot terrorists or deadly natural disasters striking at reasonable intervals, we Japanese have traits that can only be developed through four distinct seasons and the rest we won't tell you about because we want to be inscrutable.

some more ground fucking breaking news from my japin-laws... last week, my MIL said that Japan does not only have 4 seasons... but 5, tsuyu... Japanese are really used to diverse weather and still stay strong despite a natural disaster and a nuclear disasters.

I wanted to say... no, tsuyu is not a season, it is just a part of your summer. and... if you didn't want to go through the first disaster, Japan should have surrendered after the given warnings. and yes that would have been better than A)two bombs and fire bomb raids, or B) the Yanks having to kill off ever last soldier hopped up on meth. But the second Nuclear disaster is unavoidable, but it will give you guys a chance to be "superior" in something by experimenting with the rehab and medication for contaminated humans, animals, and natural resources... that or having the worlds first incredible hulk.

[Ganma]

Mind you, I do find it hard to "get" a cuntry where the ideal "woman" is actually a 12-year-old girl wearing cat's ears, glasses, a maid's outfit and 44-inch bust and only exists virtually so she will obey your every command and there's no need to try and have a decent conversation.

Never fear, the dutch wife for you is here:

[Samurai_Jerk]

Mind you, I do find it hard to "get" a cuntry where the ideal "woman" is actually a 12-year-old girl wearing cat's ears, glasses, a maid's outfit and 44-inch bust and only exists virtually so she will obey your every command and there's no need to try and have a decent conversation.

Perfect.

I can kind of understand thought. The last thing I'd want to do is get my cock and balls dirty with real pussy juice.

BTW, If J-E Translation were rocket science, I'd be a janitor at NASA.

[matsuki]

He then proceeded to tell me that the sun in Japan is a bit different and they should wear hats... My MIL got snobby and said that I dont have to put hats on them and my wife just tried to get me out of their house so I wouldn't start laughing at them.

I gave up on trying to re-educate the old folk, just not worth the effort. They mean well so just agree, then after you leave, let the kids decide if they want the hats on or not.

last week, my MIL said that Japan does not only have 4 seasons... but 5, tsuyu... Japanese are really used to diverse weather and still stay strong despite a natural disaster and a nuclear disasters.

Once again, the old fogeys won't ever change. Just humor her misguided mindset, and make sure your kids don't hear it.

[Bucky]

exactly.
last week, my MIL said that Japan does not only have 4 seasons... but 5, tsuyu...

WTF? In Texas there are just TWO seasons: Football and Spring Football.

[Iraira]

WTF? In Texas there are just TWO seasons: Football and Spring Football.

Shit, dude, that's the perfect retort....we gots Basketball, Baseball, Football, and Hockey season. That's 4...and last I checked 4=4, so time to bury the Four Seasons (not the hotel chain) myth.

[IparryU]

Shit, dude, that's the perfect retort....we gots Basketball, Baseball, Football, and Hockey season. That's 4...and last I checked 4=4, so time to bury the Four Seasons (not the hotel chain) myth.

WAIT! THERE IS 5!

Soccer is in there... for us ppl who like "Football without pads" that is...

[Iraira]

WAIT! THERE IS 5!

Soccer is in there... for us ppl who like "Football without pads" that is...

You referring to this?

[Samurai_Jerk]

WAIT! THERE IS 5!

Soccer is in there... for us ppl who like "Football without pads" that is...

You mean homos, right?

[matsuki]

Just to add my weight to this excellent discussion.

Until 3/11, was working as in-house translator at a major ad firm in Tokyo.

My nemesis was a Japanese lady who had lived abroad for several years and was therefore an expert on the English language.

She was allowed to question my English even though I am a native but when I question her Japanese she got shocked and said "but I'm native! Can't you see there's no point in questioning my Japnaese?"

amazing

bwahahahahaha, this is exactly what I'm talking about

[matsuki]

yeah. I suppose there's no replacement for being [s]native[/s] Japanese eh !

I think that's their mindset...

[Samurai_Jerk]

Does Japan even have a top-class university program that teaches translation and interpretation? As far as I know, they only teach it in crappy programs at technical colleges.

[matsuki]

Does Japan even have a top-class university program that teaches translation and interpretation? As far as I know, they only teach it in crappy programs at technical colleges.

...and SJ in for the kill blow. Credentials credentials credentials is what they love to brag about.

[Screwed-down Hairdo]

Does Japan even have a top-class university program.

FTFY.

Personally, I don't think either skill is one that can be taught.

I would guess for translation at least the Japanese wouldn't be too bad as rote memorization is actually quite effective and that is certainly one area where the education system in this cuntry excels.

And when it comes to interpreting, I've probably seen more Japanese interpreters working J-E-J who are better at the job than people from English-speaking countries, myself included. The prime reason is they deal with the intricacies of politeness and other keigo bullshite required for Japanese whereas English speakers are generally content if the message gets passed across in a manner they can comprehend. Like it or not, cultural factors are important in interpretation (and translation) and I can't hold my own against a Japanese native when it comes to interpreting into Japanese.

[james]

Basically there is arrogance on a large scale within Japan and this is probably due to years of isolation and self-reinforcement.

and all the extra compacted (bull)shit that is accomodated by the longer japanese intestines.