Wedding/engagement ring advice

[matsuki]

No, not for me...my revolving door of lemurs is still spinning. Just saw this topic on another forum I frequent and remember that the one time I was engaged, the bitch demanded a diamond engagement ring or there would be no wedding. I escaped with my life (and wallet) intact Anyhow, I've come across quite a few lemurs like her that expect diamonds and I was wondering how you married folk handled the matter?

One guy has suggested synthetic diamonds...cheaper than mined ones and colored (much rarer in nature) are easier to come by for less:

http://www.apollodiamond.com/
http://www.chatham.com/
http://d.neadiamonds.com/

....and then there's Moissanite. (no, it's not Coligny's self discovered mineral) Space diamonds...ooooh! This stuff sounds quite nice as well if you have one of them rare womens that is rational.(or doesn't know any better)

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Moissanite

[FG Lurker]

Best thing to do is pick a low maintenance woman who isn't a control freak. Of course that also means you're probably not going to get an absolutely stunning arm decoration as those tend to be both high maintenance and mentally unbalanced (to say the least.)

That said, an engagement ring is a tiny expense compared to the cost of being married. Add in a kid or two and the engagement ring will seem like a minor expense. The JHS my daughter wants to go to from next year is over 1mil yen/year for tuition, with any extra expenses (sports travel etc) on top of that!

So, if the cost of the ring is a massive concern then getting married probably is something best avoided.

[Coligny]

Aside from the scam that are diamonds (see cracked articul: http://www.cracked.com/article_19367_6-companies-that-rigged-game-and-changed-world.html)...

We've been quite rationnal at home... Engagement ring were kept as wedding ring and are made of titanium with engravement inside. The logic behind is that in case of plane crash it will make identification of bodies much easier...

Now, if she want's'a diamond, I can buy her one anytime... it's her muney anyway... (/manwhore...)

[Coligny]

The JHS my daughter wants to go to from next year is over 1mil yen/year for tuition, with any extra expenses (sports travel etc) on top of that!

That's quite an expensive daycare...

[matsuki]

Best thing to do is pick a low maintenance woman who isn't a control freak. Of course that also means you're probably not going to get an absolutely stunning arm decoration as those tend to be both high maintenance and mentally unbalanced (to say the least.)

Hahahaha, aren't we all after that nice balance of arm decoration and sanity? But yes, bitches with ultimatums about diamonds, weddings, etc. are best avoided.

That said, an engagement ring is a tiny expense compared to the cost of being married. Add in a kid or two and the engagement ring will seem like a minor expense. The JHS my daughter wants to go to from next year is over 1mil yen/year for tuition, with any extra expenses (sports travel etc) on top of that!

Exactly, so...uh, why throw away money on a "rare" mined blood diamond? BTW, Lurker, on that tangent, have you ever though of sending your daughter overseas for school? When my son is old enough, he's getting sent to LA to go to the same H.S. I did...although far from perfect, it will probably be a better experience and a more rounded education than he'd get here. (and wouldn't cost anything, just some headache and paperwork to enroll him)

So, if the cost of the ring is a massive concern then getting married probably is something best avoided.

It's not so much of a massive concern as it is exactly what Coligny pointed out, an international scam by Diamond syndicate De Beers. TIJ, we should all be familiar with syndicates artificially (insanely) overpriced goods. Hell, with synthetic diamonds now available, the mined diamond retailers are coming up with alot of silly excuses to try to discredit them. (They sound alot like Japanese excuses for making things difficult for imported goods)

So yeah, if the inner racoon of a woman materializes and her need for sparkly things to horde shows, I don't mind caving in to satisfy the craving....I'd just rather not throw away additional money when you have other options.

[FG Lurker]

Exactly, so...uh, why throw away money on a "rare" mined blood diamond?

Buy Canadian Ice Diamonds instead. It's the cost of keeping a woman happy. It's fine to say that women should understand about diamonds not being rare and makeup just being marketing bullshit. Many western women went down that road and now do their best to be the same as men. So think of it as the price you pay to have a feminine female.

BTW, Lurker, on that tangent, have you ever though of sending your daughter overseas for school? When my son is old enough, he's getting sent to LA to go to the same H.S. I did...although far from perfect, it will probably be a better experience and a more rounded education than he'd get here. (and wouldn't cost anything, just some headache and paperwork to enroll him)

I looked into a few private schools in Canada. Including room & board I was looking at $30k to $40k per year. She's done fine (as in she has been happy) in public elementary school but the level of education really doesn't match what a decent private school can offer. It's not something I understood at all until I had a kid of my own. In fact it's something I pretty much ridiculed as insane until my own kid got into elementary school and we started thinking about options for JHS and beyond.

[matsuki]

Buy Canadian Ice Diamonds instead. It's the cost of keeping a woman happy.

Good suggestion as well. Hmm how's the Yen to Canadian dollar? Maybe now's the time to buy loose stones

It's fine to say that women should understand about diamonds not being rare and makeup just being marketing bullshit. Many western women went down that road and now do their best to be the same as men. So think of it as the price you pay to have a feminine female.

Mmmm, you hit the nail on the head with western women doing there best to be men. (and make men lose their stones) I don't mind the concept of the sparkly engagement/wedding ring, just think one can find a way to please her without raping your wallet.

I looked into a few private schools in Canada. Including room & board I was looking at $30k to $40k per year. She's done fine (as in she has been happy) in public elementary school but the level of education really doesn't match what a decent private school can offer. It's not something I understood at all until I had a kid of my own. In fact it's something I pretty much ridiculed as insane until my own kid got into elementary school and we started thinking about options for JHS and beyond.

Wow, nothing near family? If they have to be put up in a dormitory, I can see it getting expensive but how are the actual private school rates compared to ones in Japan?

[FG Lurker]

Wow, nothing near family? If they have to be put up in a dormitory, I can see it getting expensive

My parents are ~70 now and don't live on a bus route. They would have to drive her every morning to the bus and then pick her up every afternoon. They're quite busy with their own things and I don't really want to impose on them to that degree. My sister moved to rural Manitoba a few years ago and there aren't any decent schools anywhere near where she is living.

but how are the actual private school rates compared to ones in Japan?

The actual cost of the schooling isn't all that different. Many schools in Japan would actually be cheaper than a good private school in Canada now but the one she would like to go to (and I would like her to go to as well) happens to be expensive.

[matsuki]

My parents are ~70 now and don't live on a bus route. They would have to drive her every morning to the bus and then pick her up every afternoon. They're quite busy with their own things and I don't really want to impose on them to that degree. My sister moved to rural Manitoba a few years ago and there aren't any decent schools anywhere near where she is living.

The actual cost of the schooling isn't all that different. Many schools in Japan would actually be cheaper than a good private school in Canada now but the one she would like to go to (and I would like her to go to as well) happens to be expensive.

Ouch, sounds like you don't have many options. Odd to hear the private schools here could actually be cheaper than in Canada ...considering enrollment must be falling with the population.

[FG Lurker]

Ouch, sounds like you don't have many options. Odd to hear the private schools here could actually be cheaper than in Canada ...considering enrollment must be falling with the population.

Even with Japan's population plateau there are still a lot of people here, and a very high population density in any urban prefecture.

There would be some advantages to sending her to Canada and some advantages to keeping her here in Japan. For now I think her staying here is the better option, and thankfully there are some very good schooling options around. It all costs money though.

[matsuki]

Even with Japan's population plateau there are still a lot of people here, and a very high population density in any urban prefecture.

There would be some advantages to sending her to Canada and some advantages to keeping her here in Japan. For now I think her staying here is the better option, and thankfully there are some very good schooling options around. It all costs money though.

Anything that keeps her from the warewarenihon shit is good in my book.

[FG Lurker]

Anything that keeps her from the warewarenihon shit is good in my book.

She's half Japanese, as any of your kids with Japanese women will be. My wife and I have done our best to raise her to think independently and not follow groupthink, and I like to believe we have been reasonably successful. At the same time though she will always have the influences of two cultures and see things from two viewpoints. This has many good points as well as some bad points. In the end you have to take the bad with the good and do the best you can. If this isn't something you are willing to work with then marrying outside your own culture is not for you.

[Mike Oxlong]

Anything that keeps her from the warewarenihon shit is good in my book.

As is anything that keeps them from the private Xtian academies seen in my youth.

[FG Lurker]

As is anything that keeps them from the private Xtian academies seen in my youth.

Amen to that!

[Typhoon]

No, not for me...my revolving door of lemurs is still spinning. Just saw this topic on another forum I frequent and remember that the one time I was engaged, the bitch demanded a diamond engagement ring or there would be no wedding. I escaped with my life (and wallet) intact Anyhow, I've come across quite a few lemurs like her that expect diamonds and I was wondering how you married folk handled the matter?

One guy has suggested synthetic diamonds...cheaper than mined ones and colored (much rarer in nature) are easier to come by for less:

http://www.apollodiamond.com/
http://www.chatham.com/
http://d.neadiamonds.com/

An entirely sensible option. No difference between man-made and so-called natural diamonds except the natural ones are more likely to contain flaws and imperfections.
If this supposedly makes them more valuable, then de Beers can have them.

....and then there's Moissanite. (no, it's not Coligny's self discovered mineral) Space diamonds...ooooh! This stuff sounds quite nice as well if you have one of them rare womens that is rational.(or doesn't know any better)

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Moissanite

Another good option.

[Typhoon]

Best thing to do is pick a low maintenance woman who isn't a control freak. Of course that also means you're probably not going to get an absolutely stunning arm decoration as those tend to be both high maintenance and mentally unbalanced (to say the least.)

Quite right.

LM is definitely the way to go.

Skipped the engagement bit and went straight to wedding ring and city hall.

Still going strong nearly two decades later.

[Typhoon]

And then there are the guys that are so romantic that they even get their ex-wives the big rock that they always wanted. . .

[Greji]

The fucking:shock: rock is part of their perception of what the requirements for a wedding are. Just like the expensive church wedding or hiroen. It you can afford it, get her the rock. If you can't afford it, she should understand and hope for one later in the marriage. If she can't understand, or live with that, you probably shouldn't be marrying her in the first place.....

[Mike Oxlong]

I'll stick with a old friend's advice from my halcyon days back in Canuckistan..."Don't get married Mike, don't ever get married."

[Samurai_Jerk]

Why the fuck would any self-respecting man want to get married?

[matsuki]

She's half Japanese, as any of your kids with Japanese women will be. My wife and I have done our best to raise her to think independently and not follow groupthink, and I like to believe we have been reasonably successful. At the same time though she will always have the influences of two cultures and see things from two viewpoints. This has many good points as well as some bad points. In the end you have to take the bad with the good and do the best you can. If this isn't something you are willing to work with then marrying outside your own culture is not for you.

FGL respect +999999999999999

As is anything that keeps them from the private Xtian academies seen in my youth.

That goes without saying. I'm glad my rents both had enough bad experiences in their youth to have not put me and my brother through it.

[FG Lurker]

I'll stick with a old friend's advice from my halcyon days back in Canuckistan..."Don't get married Mike, don't ever get married."

If I lived in Canada (or any place with similarly anti-male laws) I wouldn't get married either.

[ythq]SniOXFhwIZ8[/ythq]

These days the husband maintaining half would be pretty optimistic.

[wuchan]

Ms. Wu didn't get a ring until we were married. No huge event, no parents. Just the justice and two friends (law required). The trade off was all jewelry must be tiffany or better for the rest of our lives. Truth is I agree, high quality jewelry is an investment. If you buy crap, as in anything from a japanese jeweler, it will only cost more money down the road in repairs and maintenance.

[tidbits]

Maybe this is an opportunity for me to ask you guys here what are wedding rings for? I really didn't expect one and wouldn't mind without a wedding ring, but got one anyway. I lost it a few years ago, I don't think it was very expensive, got a replacement from my husband after that, he probably want me to wear it more than I want to. Maybe it is a cultural thing? I really can't see the meaning of wedding rings. Are wedding rings just for telling others and ourselves (the married) that we are married? Some couples don't wear wedding rings but their marrige last forever.

[Coligny]

Maybe this is an opportunity for me to ask you guys here what are wedding rings for? I really didn't expect one and wouldn't mind without a wedding ring, but got one anyway. I lost it a few years ago, I don't think it was very expensive, got a replacement from my husband after that, he probably want me to wear it more than I want to. Maybe it is a cultural thing? I really can't see the meaning of wedding rings. Are wedding rings just for telling others and ourselves (the married) that we are married? Some couples don't wear wedding rings but their marrige last forever.

chick magnet

plane crash ID

something the cats teeth get stuck on when they bite your hand

[matsuki]

chick magnet

I know a guy here that wears a fake wedding ring to pick up girls. Whores I tell yah.....but boy does he wrangle them in!

[Greji]

I know a guy here that wears a fake wedding ring to pick up girls. Whores I tell yah.....but boy does he wrangle them in!

?????
If he's gotta wear a ring to pick up hooks, it would seem that something seems to be missing in his play book.....