Top 10 Things I Learned in Japan

[Samurai_Jerk]

For some reason the imminent demise of this version of FG has made me start to reflect on my time in Japan so I've come up with a top-10 list of things being here has taught me.

1. How to look busy at work while accomplishing absolutely nothing
2. How to ride a bicycle drunk
3. Patience
4. Japanese
5. Teaching English is more boring than watching paint dry
6. Karaoke can be fun
7. Those stupid high pitched voices that girls in anime have are actually representative of how hour average Japanese girl talks
8. X-rays and antibiotics are the answer to anything that ails you
9. I hate Australians (except SDH)
10. Raw chicken tastes good

[Screwed-down Hairdo]

For some reason the imminent demise of this version of FG has made me start to reflect on my time in Japan so I've come up with a top-10 list of things being here has taught me.

1. How to look busy at work while accomplishing absolutely nothing
2. How to ride a bicycle drunk
3. Patience
4. Japanese
5. Teaching English is more boring than watching paint dry
6. Karaoke can be fun
7. Those stupid high pitched voices that girls in anime have are actually representative of how hour average Japanese girl talks
8. X-rays and antibiotics are the answer to anything that ails you
9. I hate Australians (except SDH)
10. Raw chicken tastes good

I'm quite honored by No. 9. Thank you! You've just made my day and now I'm going to put your No. 1 in practice to come up with my own list...

[wagyl]

I'm quite honored by No. 9. Thank you!

Don't get tickets on yourself, mate. It is only because of your obvious divided loyalty shown by your support for Irish nationalism.

(I have no horse in that race, by the way [deliberate choice of metaphor]. I think Ulster would be equally stuffed being run from Dublin as being run from Westminster. Thank God we have the maturity to be able to say things like that these days)

But I don't want to derail what promises to be an interesting thread. I mainly wanted to avoid saying something I would regret, like "what, no love for rooboy??"

[Screwed-down Hairdo]

...I think Ulster would be equally stuffed being run from Dublin as being run from Westminster. Thank God we have the maturity to be able to say things like that these days.

I have absolutely no idea what the fuck ulster is, but think you're absolutely right on both counts.

[Screwed-down Hairdo]

[American Oyaji]

SDH is an Aussie??!!!?

[GomiGirl]

SDH - you really have to learn how to form an opinion.

You must spread some Reputation around before giving it to Screwed-down Hairdo again.

[GomiGirl]

SDH is an Aussie??!!!?

Hello - earth to AO. He is the ultimate Aussie.

He reminds us more often than you remind us about how much you like hairy babes and how big your dick is.

[IparryU]

Hello - earth to AO. He is the ultimate Aussie.

He reminds us more often than you remind us about how much you like hairy babes and how big your dick is.

Ya... not knowing that is really difficult.

It was a big shocker to see that... I think it is sarcasm though...

[Yokohammer]

For some reason the imminent demise of this version of FG has made me start to reflect on my time in Japan ...

Sounds like you need to get out more.

No disrespect to FG.com and you lot, who have unquestionably become a part of my life over the past few years (aggravations and all), but if it represented the entirety of my existence in Japan I'd probably be on the next plane out.

Although I do understand that's probably not what you were saying ... it just kinda struck me that way.

Earthquake! ... (2:23 PM)

OK ... what was I saying? Oh never mind ...

[Screwed-down Hairdo]

He reminds us more often than you remind us about how much you like hairy babes and how big your dick is.

AO, how about a swap?

You can be an Aussie and I'll have your big dick? (You can keep the hairy babes, though...)

[Samurai_Jerk]

Sounds like you need to get out more.

No disrespect to FG.com and you lot, who have unquestionably become a part of my life over the past few years (aggravations and all), but if it represented the entirety of my existence in Japan I'd probably be on the next plane out

I think you misunderstand. I spend 9 hours plus a day at the office which means I spend a lot of time on FG (See No. 1 on my list).

[cstaylor]

For some reason the imminent demise of this version of FG has made me start to reflect on my time in Japan so I've come up with a top-10 list of things being here has taught me.

11. Public transit _does_ work when planned properly
12. You can barely squeeze three weeks of good weather out of four seasons
13. Electronic wallets are amazing, especially when purchasing green car seats
14. All it takes is a little gaiatsu to jump from ISDN to 100MBps fiber
15. You can have ten television stations yet not find anything worth watching
16. The Japanese government can be generous when it comes to children

[Samurai_Jerk]

15. You can have ten television stations yet not find anything worth watching

That's nothing. When I'm back in the US visiting family and turn on the digital cable, I can't find anything to watch with over 500 channels to choose from.

[Yokohammer]

I think you misunderstand. I spend 9 hours plus a day at the office which means I spend a lot of time on FG (See No. 1 on my list).

Yeah, I kinda got that.

9+ hours at the same office every day ... don't think I could handle that either. Being independent can be a pain in the ass at times, but at least when the workload eases off you don't have to sit there staring at the walls or trying to look busy. If I was still doing the office thing (I went independent many moons ago) I'd probably have left by now too.

So in a way, "you need to get out more" probably does apply.

Unless, of course, you really enjoy your time in the office ...

[Samurai_Jerk]

Unless, of course, you really enjoy your time in the office ...

Until I find a way to get paid for drinking myself stupid and hooking up with randoms chicks I'll never meet again, I'll never enjoy working.

[yanpa]

10.There are some really, truly wonderful, amazing people in this cuntry (but not many of them who arrived from overseas anytime after about 1998 ).

I resent that remark

[SIZE="1"](unless I'm one of the not many)[/SIZE]

[Samurai_Jerk]

I resent that remark

[SIZE="1"](unless I'm one of the not many)[/SIZE]

I barely made the cut.

[GomiGirl]

Yes to all you wrote but especially these two.

(snip)
13. Electronic wallets are amazing, especially when purchasing green car seats
(snip)
16. The Japanese government can be generous when it comes to children

My contributions:
17: Takkyubin Rocks!!
18: Walking seems really slow after you get used to riding a bike around town. Doubly so if you traded in your stroller for the kids seat on a mama-chari.
19: Mama-chari's are dorky but given 18. you just don't care.
20: Transportation and postal workers take pride in their jobs and don't strike on holidays or other maximum inconvenience days.
21: Tipping doesn't have to buy you any extra service.

[Yokohammer]

Until I find a way to get paid for drinking myself stupid and hooking up with randoms chicks I'll never meet again, I'll never enjoy working.

There has to be a way ...
No openings in any host bars down your way?

But getting back to your original post, I think I reacted to the "reflecting on my time in Japan" part because it struck me in a poignant sort of way. It's pretty clear that the writing is on the wall, and we are probably looking at the end of Japan as we knew it ... and whether that's good, bad, or indifferent remains to be seen. So reflecting on one's time here is definitely in the news, and the upcoming change to (or dissolution of) FG.com is at least a symbol, if not a symptom.

Dismal economy, clownish politics, dwindling relevance, life-threatening geology and infrastructure ... if I was 20 ... er, make that 25 years younger I'd probably be looking for a way out.

As for things I've learned during my time here the list is too long to enumerate, but it's pretty clear that most of it is only applicable here, and therein lies a dilemma (and a warning).

Stick around long enough and you will be assimilated. But that, too, becomes what you make of it.

Weird. Still haven't really decided what I want to be when I grow up. ]Edit: Damn, this thread has affected me so much that I've even changed my signature![/I]

[Screwed-down Hairdo]

I resent that remark

(unless I'm one of the not many)

You (and anyone else on this board) are naturally among the "not many." (I loved your West Island dialect joke, BTW)

[Samurai_Jerk]

[Coligny]

10 things learned in Japan

1 There is such thing as child murder for a nationnal hobby...
2 When a smart hoe speaks to you she's aiming for a visa out.
3 When a dumb hoe speaks to you, she's aiming at your wallet
4 when a hoe goes down on you she's aiming at your dick
5 They will always follow the rules like imbeciles, unless it's for managing a nuclear powerplant, then they will just act like plain garden variety imbeciles.
6 There are such people as smart japanese. 95% of them are already living abroad.
7 Most French expats seems to exist only to justify murder or the return of death penalty.
8 Amerikun people are sometimes frequentabul (more than french expats anyway).
9 Aussies are people too. Almost certainly.
10 It's not really helping to get up in the morning when you realise that despite being in a country of mouthbreathers where mother nature tries to kill you on a daily basis and with a nukular meltdown nextdoor, you still feell it would take much more to give you a reason to go 'home'

[JLR]

if I was 20 ... er, make that 25 years younger I'd probably be looking for a way out.

*nods head in agreement* *clutches plane ticket out of here*

22.) People double as leaning/resting posts on the train.
23.) shikataganai and ganbatte are magical cure words for any situation gone wrong.
24.) Mayo is a food group

[yanpa]

8 Amerikun people are sometimes frequentabul (more than french expats anyway).

You've lost me on the word "frequentabul", does it mean something like "American expats justify murder or the return of death penalty less than French expats"?

[SIZE="1"](just curious, not playing linguistic schlong-waving or anything, I had 9 years of French at school and last time I tried speaking it to a French person, they replied to me in German )[/SIZE]

[Samurai_Jerk]

You've lost me on the word "frequentabul", does it mean something like "American expats justify murder or the return of death penalty less than French expats"?

[SIZE="1"](just curious, not playing linguistic schlong-waving or anything, I had 9 years of French at school and last time I tried speaking it to a French person, they replied to me in German )[/SIZE]

Don't worry. You're not the only one scratching his head.

[Coligny]

Frequentable: with whom one can be seen, whose company can be enjoyed.

But guys, dont tell anyone I said that, I could lose my passport and my card of the french communist party if the word wuz to spread...

It was one of those wild bets I take with language, the 'with some luck they also use that word'... BTW you still didn't invest if french dictionnary ? you gonna get lost when we take over the world again... Lead to victory by our great new leader... whose name escapes me right now... since everybody have been calling him Flamby for at least one decade... (that's the name of a caramel pudding for kids...)

[yanpa]

BTW you still didn't invest if french dictionnary ? you gonna get lost when we take over the world again...

Bien sur, j'ai such un livre, mais il est de Langenscheidt (!) et il est un piece of merde sans un mot comme "frequentable".

Je pour moi dis "bienvenue" a nos overlords communistiques francaises {insert fancy adjective conjugated from "nouveau" here}, or something like that.

[Coligny]

25 Learned to use a geiger counter.
26 Having to prove ownership of the trash I have to pay to be disposed of.
27 You can get an "aaawwww shit" faces from the popo when you pull out the road and traffic law book in front of them.

[Screwed-down Hairdo]

Bien sur, j'ai such un livre, mais il est de Langenscheidt (!) et il est un piece of merde sans un mot comme "frequentable".

Je pour moi dis "bienvenue" a nos overlords communistiques francaises {insert fancy adjective conjugated from "nouveau" here}, or something like that.

Some take this piss out of Coligny, but the above is an example of the jumble the poor bastard has as a native tongue. Considering that, I admire the hell out of the bloke for his tremendous command of English (actually, as a <cunning>linguist, I honestly sit and read some of the filthy Frenchie's posts in sheer, utter awe at his ability to manipulate English. I sincerely dip my lid to him).


* Coligny, my favorite form of repayment for flattery like this is arranging for your Julie to take on an assistant whenever she needs to do her ob/gyn examinations....