
Sadly, no,

It's just a bunch of officals, but the news is good

Officials cut the tape to inaugurate shinkansen services at Shinagawa Station on Wednesday. The new station has heated up the fierce competition between bullet trains and airlines.
Shinkansen operator, Central Japan Railway Co. (JR Tokai), revised the timetable of the Tokaido Shinkansen, drastically increasing the number of faster Nozomi superexpress trains and raising the maximum speed of slower trains to 270 kilometers per hour.
JR Tokai officials proudly said the new timetable will make trips between Tokyo and Osaka more convenient [although without the possibility of a haircut en route].
Moreover, the company reduced the minimum fare of the Nozomi superexpress trains between Tokyo or Shinagawa Stations and Shin-Osaka Station to 13,240 yen from 14,720 yen.
More, faster and cheaper - good in any ... service.
