Child Abduction Issue Explodes

[GomiGirl]

IPU - I am sorry you are going through this but I hope you are just keeping things civil for your kids sake.

They are too young to understand this stuff and while it is too easy to take pot shots at the ex, be the bigger man and teach your kids some important values.

[IparryU]

BUT sometimes they just come across as "I hate him! I'll never let him see MY child."

This is such a sucky attitude.

The child isn't property or chattel to be used as leverage in a fight with another person. They are a person with their own rights and needs that should come second to the prejudices and battles of their genetic origins. Like it or not, the child has two parents and that needs to be respected. Telling a child that half of their genetic makeup came from a bad person just makes them confused about themselves.

But sadly, many selfish, weak and cowardly people don't fight fairly and the collateral damage falls onto the innocent.

This is the major issue in Japan. The dad just makes money and does fuck all for the family despite driving them places and picking up the tab, leaving the mothers with 100% responsibility with everything and they inherit the attitude of, "my children".

My ex changed my kids last names and was demanding a higher rate of child support and threatened to get lawyers on me if I didn't pay. Luckily, I did my research and talked to a few lawyers about this, and since she changed their names, the obligation to pay child support severely decreases in court as my sons are, "not mine" anymore and the child support I am paying now can be cut in half if lawyers are involved as I am paying much more than I need to and my ex is also receiving "single mother" allowance/benefits from the country.

Mind you, I told her this and she STFU really quick. She also threatened to call my office and I kindly notified her that she would be invoiced for time spent by my directors if she did.

Money talks, bullshit walks.

Did you consent to the name change or does she have right to do it without your consent?

there is no joint custody in this cuntry... so yes, she had the right to do without my consent.

[Samurai_Jerk]

BUT sometimes they just come across as "I hate him! I'll never let him see MY child."

This is such a sucky attitude.

The child isn't property or chattel to be used as leverage in a fight with another person. They are a person with their own rights and needs that should come second to the prejudices and battles of their genetic origins. Like it or not, the child has two parents and that needs to be respected. Telling a child that half of their genetic makeup came from a bad person just makes them confused about themselves.

But sadly, many selfish, weak and cowardly people don't fight fairly and the collateral damage falls onto the innocent.

This is the major issue in Japan. The dad just makes money and does fuck all for the family despite driving them places and picking up the tab, leaving the mothers with 100% responsibility with everything and they inherit the attitude of, "my children".

My ex changed my kids last names and was demanding a higher rate of child support and threatened to get lawyers on me if I didn't pay. Luckily, I did my research and talked to a few lawyers about this, and since she changed their names, the obligation to pay child support severely decreases in court as my sons are, "not mine" anymore and the child support I am paying now can be cut in half if lawyers are involved as I am paying much more than I need to and my ex is also receiving "single mother" allowance/benefits from the country.

Mind you, I told her this and she STFU really quick. She also threatened to call my office and I kindly notified her that she would be invoiced for time spent by my directors if she did.

Money talks, bullshit walks.

Did you consent to the name change or does she have right to do it without your consent?

there is no joint custody in this cuntry... so yes, she had the right to do without my consent.

Awesome

I hate to say this but you might be heading for one of those situations where you get cut off from your kids. I remember before the divorce you said the in-laws liked you and knew their daughter was messed up. Are you still in good with them? If so, make sure that never changes.

[IparryU]

IPU - I am sorry you are going through this but I hope you are just keeping things civil for your kids sake.

They are too young to understand this stuff and while it is too easy to take pot shots at the ex, be the bigger man and teach your kids some important values.

We are both being rather civil about this and they boys are doing good. I see them every weekend and mom doesn't fret about it.

Thank God I got the easy route... cause I don't know what I would do if I would have had to go through the fucked horror stories that you read/hear about on the news.

Awesome

I hate to say this but you might be heading for one of those situations where you get cut off from your kids. I remember before the divorce you said the in-laws liked you and knew their daughter was messed up. Are you still in good with them? If so, make sure that never changes.

The mom and twin sister are still on good terms with me and I could care less about the dad. Life is ok thus far.

[matsuki]

We are both being rather civil about this and they boys are doing good. I see them every weekend and mom doesn't fret about it.

She doesn't sound too civil...

The mom and twin sister are still on good terms with me and I could care less about the dad. Life is ok thus far.

Good to hear. I wouldn't necessarily trust them but they may end up being the voice of reason for your ex.

[IparryU]

We are both being rather civil about this and they boys are doing good. I see them every weekend and mom doesn't fret about it.

She doesn't sound too civil...

The mom and twin sister are still on good terms with me and I could care less about the dad. Life is ok thus far.

Good to hear. I wouldn't necessarily trust them but they may end up being the voice of reason for your ex.

Not to civil, but after comparing to some of my friends and stories... she is like an angel.

Keep your friends close and your enemies even closer. They do put her in check sometimes... usually a reminder that I am her cash cow and shooing me away means no money.

[gaijinpunch]

Wanna go drink and share war stories? I'm a stone's throw from Shinjuku. We're being civil, but son's mother lives on another planet. Basically if you throw money into any scenario, she turns retarded and totally shits the mattress... wants to dip into the savings all the fucking time rather than do what any normal person would do: cut the fat. Anyway, we're beyond most of it but the dough is in my name thank the lord . I'm not looking to screw here financially by any means... but fuck... if we had the setup most couples do in this cuntry I'd be in the poor house already. Kinda shocked I'm not already.

[matsuki]

If you guys do, count me in as well...FG father support group up in here. (though I'm apparently off the hook financially, I haven't seen the kiddo in a long time and don't expect to ever be able to)

[gaijinpunch]

If you guys do, count me in as well...FG father support group up in here. (though I'm apparently off the hook financially, I haven't seen the kiddo in a long time and don't expect to ever be able to)

That fucking sucks big donkey balls. I feel a bit petty now. It's not all hams & plaque (he's not allowed to come over to my house, and definitely not sleep over) but I get to take him out for most of the day for my day on the weekend. Control freak, to say the least.

[IparryU]

If you guys do, count me in as well...FG father support group up in here. (though I'm apparently off the hook financially, I haven't seen the kiddo in a long time and don't expect to ever be able to)

That fucking sucks big donkey balls. I feel a bit petty now. It's not all hams & plaque (he's not allowed to come over to my house, and definitely not sleep over) but I get to take him out for most of the day for my day on the weekend. Control freak, to say the least.

lets do this sometime. I am free this Sunday and Monday.

[Screwed-down Hairdo]

Monday during the day I'm free and would love to join in...

[IparryU]

Monday during the day I'm free and would love to join in...

liquid lunch?

we can organize this via email too so we all keep in the loop.

[Screwed-down Hairdo]

Monday during the day I'm free and would love to join in...

liquid lunch?

Trust me...you don't want to do a liquid lunch with me.

[IparryU]

Monday during the day I'm free and would love to join in...

liquid lunch?

Trust me...you don't want to do a liquid lunch with me.

why not? i will just cc everyone in email to arrange for this weekend... i just dont got gaijinpunch's email...

[Screwed-down Hairdo]

Monday during the day I'm free and would love to join in...

liquid lunch?

Trust me...you don't want to do a liquid lunch with me.

why not? i will just cc everyone in email to arrange for this weekend... i just dont got gaijinpunch's email...

If it is, I'm in (especially if it's Shinjuku)

[IparryU]

Monday during the day I'm free and would love to join in...

liquid lunch?

Trust me...you don't want to do a liquid lunch with me.

why not? i will just cc everyone in email to arrange for this weekend... i just dont got gaijinpunch's email...

If it is, I'm in (especially if it's Shinjuku)

ok, just sent an email out to everyone that I know here... please invite and add ppl to the email chain.

dare we ask take or mcblowjob to attend for and FG roast?

[Mike Oxlong]

Got a few tales of woe to add to the pile - anyone wanna shout for a LCC boarding pass?

[Screwed-down Hairdo]

anyone wanna shout for a LCC boarding pass?

If you mean "shout" as in holler, I'd be more than happy to do so, but if you're insinuating you're in need of a fare (as I fear you are), I'm afraid I'm of absolutely no help at all as I'm gonna struggle with the few hundred yen I need to get to Shinjuku as it is anyway....Sorry, it would have been lovely to have seen you.

[Mike Oxlong]

anyone wanna shout for a LCC boarding pass?

If you mean "shout" as in holler, I'd be more than happy to do so, but if you're insinuating you're in need of a fare (as I fear you are), I'm afraid I'm of absolutely no help at all as I'm gonna struggle with the few hundred yen I need to get to Shinjuku as it is anyway....Sorry, it would have been lovely to have seen you.

Yes sir, you are correct...I was using "shout" as in, "It's your shout, go grab us a couple more beers." I'm afraid my travel budget is as limited as yours.

[Screwed-down Hairdo]

I'm afraid my travel budget is as limited as yours.

Lovely, innit?

We'll be thinking of you, mate!

[gaijinpunch]

I'm in the motherland until the end of the month -- big fun with family emergency! But yeah, I'm semi-flexible for lunch (but it's timed). Evenings are way easier for me.

[IparryU]

Court rules parents who keep estranged partners from seeing children can be fined
NATIONAL APR. 02, 2013 - 02:55PM JST ( 2 )TOKYO —
Japan’s supreme court has ruled that parents who fail to respond to an estranged partner’s requests to see their children can be fined.

The announcement comes as the result of a series of cases in which biological parents failed to respond to requests from the former spouses to see their children. The cases resulted in a supreme court ruling on March 28 stating that the individual who proposed the meeting must make the purpose and content of the meeting clear, Fuji TV reported.

Furthermore, the court ruled that the Sapporo high court’s decision to indirectly coerce non-compliant parents using monetary fines was legal. For the first instance of non-compliance, a fine of 50,000 yen is mandated by the Sapporo high court.

A team consisting of presiding judge Ryuko Sakurai and four other judges considered the issue and agreed that, “the needs of the child should be considered and prioritized by the law. We are implementing flexible laws, in the hope that cooperation can be achieved in private without recourse to legal coercion.”

Source: http://www.japantoday.com/category/national/view/court-rules-parents-who-keep-estranged-partners-from-seeing-children-can-be-fined

[Samurai_Jerk]

You need to state the purpose for wanting to meet you own fucking kids!? Isn't that pretty goddam obvious?

Anyway, my guess is that there will be no way to enforce these fines if the person fined decides to ignore them.

[matsuki]

Progress??

http://newsonjapan.com/html/newsdesk/article/102711.php

Japan's parliament has approved an international treaty on child abductions after decades of pressure from the United States and other Western nations.
Japan is the only member of the Group of Eight major industrialised nations that has not ratified the 1980 Hague Convention, which requires nations to return snatched children to the countries where they usually reside.
Hundreds of parents, mostly men, from North America, Europe and elsewhere have been left without any recourse after their estranged partners took their half-Japanese children back to the country.

Unlike Western nations, Japan does not recognise joint custody and courts almost always order that children of divorcees live with their mothers.

US lawmakers have long demanded action from Japan on the issue, one of the few open disputes between the close allies. In February, Prime Minister Shinzo Abe promised action after White House talks with US President Barack Obama.

The upper house of parliament on Wednesday voted unanimously for Japan to join the treaty, following a similar move by the more powerful lower house last month.

But Japan must still clear various governmental and legislative hurdles before the Hague Convention can take full effect.

[Kanchou]

In other words, it's never gonna happen.

[IparryU]

In other words, it's never gonna happen.

You got that right... Just think of TEPCO and the earthquake victims...

[matsuki]

Yeah, it's like sign the treaty and then make it unenforceable.

[IparryU]

U.S. lawmakers seek accords on abducted children

A congressional committee called Thursday for the United States to reach legal agreements with Japan and other countries to help resolve hundreds of cases of children abducted by estranged parents.

The House Foreign Affairs Committee approved a bill to require the U.S. secretary of state to reach memoranda of understanding with all nations not party to the 1980 Hague Convention, which requires the return of kidnapped children to wherever they usually live.

The bill, which needs approval of the full House of Representatives and Senate, would seek to establish a mechanism with each country so that children would be returned within six weeks of an abduction report.

“Parental child abduction is child abuse. These victims are American citizens who need the help of their government when normal legal processes are unavailable or fail,” Representative Chris Smith, the sponsor of the bill, said at a hearing which took place despite a partial government shutdown.

Smith named the bill after David Goldman, who succeeded in bringing his son Sean back to the United States after a five-year fight with Brazilian courts.

The largest number of US cases involve Japan, whose courts virtually never grant custody to foreign parents, even if the Japanese mother has died.

Paul Toland, who attended the hearing, said he has not seen his daughter Erika since she was an infant in 2003. After the death of her mother, Erika has been in custody of her maternal grandmother.

“Hopefully, this bill will stir the government to action to help bring our kids home,” said Toland, who served in Japan in the U.S. Navy.

Prime Minister Shinzo Abe, like his predecessor, has voiced support for Japan’s entrance into The Hague Convention.

But parents have voiced concern that, even if Japan’s parliament ratifies the treaty, it would only apply to future cases.

The State Department has said that it puts a top priority on resolving abductions, although it has stopped short of supporting moves by lawmakers to impose sanctions over the issue.

Source: http://www.japantoday.com/category/politics/view/u-s-lawmakers-seek-accords-on-abducted-children

[Samurai_Jerk]

Send in Seal Team 6.

[Coligny]

Send in Seal Team 6.

You really want everyone dead and top secret choppers blown to bit behind enemy lines ?