Shit! Coronavirus may also be transmitted via infected feces

[matsuki]

Thanks for the funny reads from back in the day. Here we are, a decade later, and things aren't getting any better. (in general) I'm sure there are plenty of younger asshats but lately the younger physicians I've run into have been decent. My new local clinic has some sort of rotating general practitioner schedule (feels like an office using headhunters?) but each time I've gone in, they have been more helpful and accommodating than any clinic I've ever been to before. The usual 5 days worth of meds and come see me again talk is easily switched to 1-2 weeks worth of meds because of potential travel with no fuss.

[Mike Oxlong]

Japanese intestines are longer than those of foreigners, trapping the coronavirus long enough for it to be drowned in our shit.

[Thanatos' embalmed botfly]

https://twitter.com/NicholsUprising/sta ... 8476730369

lol like this would EVER happen in fucken Japan. It's like Italian people have that thing, I don't even know what the word is for it any more, been so long since I've seen it, rhymes with bowl, or mole, or foal, nope, sorry, its gone.

Abe would issue a nationwide warning or some shit:

"Please refrain from such public displays of soulfulness. As Japanese, with our hierachial pyramidical bullying system founded on the twin cornerstones of hatred and resentment of our fellow sons of Yamato, it is our solemn patriotic duty to withhold all public displays of humaneness, affinity, and empathy. As true Japanese, if we are quarantined for 1,000 fucking YEARS, not ONCE would it even enter a truly Japanese mind to even entertain the notion of such a rowdy decadent display of spiritedness. Thank you for listening, now go to work, pay your taxes and just die quietly would you."

[Grumpy Gramps]

Couldn't we convince the concerned Muricans to just buy Japanese washlets?

No foul, she means it good and it's the thought that counts, butt,,, really?

[Russell]

Fortunately, everybody is stocked up on toilet paper.

So if worse comes to worst, they can always start to wipe each others' asses just for the fun of it...

[Russell]

Couldn't we convince the concerned Muricans to just buy Japanese washlets?

No foul, she means it good and it's the thought that counts, butt,,, really?

Hmm, I couldn't help wondering how that would be arranged in a family. Will everyone have his/her own bottle, lined up against the wall of the toilet, or is there a shared bottle?

And I also like her solution to cut up a T-shirt in hand towels and use those to wipe. Her tip to wash those towels regularly because of the smell does make sense to me.

But gosh, aren't there better solutions? Like having a dog? Dogs are known to like licking each others' asses, and it would save on food too.

Creative ideas, creative ideas...

[Russell]

[Mike Oxlong]

Hmm, I couldn't help wondering how that would be arranged in a family. Will everyone have his/her own bottle, lined up against the wall of the toilet, or is there a shared bottle?

And I also like her solution to cut up a T-shirt in hand towels and use those to wipe. Her tip to wash those towels regularly because of the smell does make sense to me.

But gosh, aren't there better solutions? Like having a dog? Dogs are known to like licking each others' asses, and it would save on food too.

Creative ideas, creative ideas...

Are you calling your idea the peanut butter dog?

[Russell]

Hmm, I couldn't help wondering how that would be arranged in a family. Will everyone have his/her own bottle, lined up against the wall of the toilet, or is there a shared bottle?

And I also like her solution to cut up a T-shirt in hand towels and use those to wipe. Her tip to wash those towels regularly because of the smell does make sense to me.

But gosh, aren't there better solutions? Like having a dog? Dogs are known to like licking each others' asses, and it would save on food too.

Creative ideas, creative ideas...

Are you calling your idea the peanut butter dog?

Peanut butter! That's it! Time to buy it in quantity.

[matsuki]

The whole "we good, we have a washlet!" argument refuses to die...do people really not wipe after?

[CrankyBastard]

Wow, just came out of Costco and have never seen anything like this. There was NO toilet paper and I walked back up front to the service desk and asked if they had anymore anywhere else. The girl gave me a very rude 'NO' with a such a look of disgust that I would even ask. That was the longest walk back to the bathroom with my pants around my ankles ..

[matsuki]

Wow, just came out of Costco and have never seen anything like this. There was NO toilet paper and I walked back up front to the service desk and asked if they had anymore anywhere else. The girl gave me a very rude 'NO' with a such a look of disgust that I would even ask. That was the longest walk back to the bathroom with my pants around my ankles ..

Really? After the initial rush, last week they had a massive section of it (the usual large packs broken down into normal store size 6-packs for much less) with a "2 per family" rule. I've noticed many of the Costco employees in Japan really don't want to look anything up for you and can be quite rude when trying to blow you off.

[CrankyBastard]

Wow, just came out of Costco and have never seen anything like this. There was NO toilet paper and I walked back up front to the service desk and asked if they had anymore anywhere else. The girl gave me a very rude 'NO' with a such a look of disgust that I would even ask. That was the longest walk back to the bathroom with my pants around my ankles ..

Really? After the initial rush, last week they had a massive section of it (the usual large packs broken down into normal store size 6-packs for much less) with a "2 per family" rule. I've noticed many of the Costco employees in Japan really don't want to look anything up for you and can be quite rude when trying to blow you off.

I was jesting.
The last line was meant to be the punch line.
I see I'll have to work harder at this.

[Russell]

Nervous Americans start panic buying GUNS as sales rocket across the country and long lines form outside hunting shops amid coronavirus fears.

OK, safe to say "only in America" on this one.

[Thanatos' embalmed botfly]

Wow, just came out of Costco and have never seen anything like this. There was NO toilet paper and I walked back up front to the service desk and asked if they had anymore anywhere else. The girl gave me a very rude 'NO' with a such a look of disgust that I would even ask. That was the longest walk back to the bathroom with my pants around my ankles .

Well played, old man, well played.

[Russell]

[matsuki]

I was jesting.
The last line was meant to be the punch line.
I see I'll have to work harder at this.

LOL, I got the joke but thought you were serious about the lack of TP.

BTW, I was there today, the TP pyramid is larger than ever and they're back to selling the full on explosive diarrhea level 30 packs.

[yanpa]

Not sure if I want to know what a "full on explosive diarrhea level 30 pack" is.

Anyway the guy in Aichi who went round deliberately spreading his covidious bounty has become a mortality statistic:

「ウイルスばらまく」感染判明後に飲食店訪れた50代男性が死亡 持病あり18日入院先の病院で

[Russell]

Anyway the guy in Aichi who went round deliberately spreading his covidious bounty has become a mortality statistic:

「ウイルスばらまく」感染判明後に飲食店訪れた50代男性が死亡 持病あり18日入院先の病院で

[Thanatos' embalmed botfly]

Crucial virus FAQ here. https://spraguedawley.com/welcome-to-gu ... -cdc-unit/ Looks to be from a reputable source.

[matsuki]

Anyway the guy in Aichi who went round deliberately spreading his covidious bounty has become a mortality statistic:

「ウイルスばらまく」感染判明後に飲食店訪れた50代男性が死亡 持病あり18日入院先の病院で

I can almost hear the relatives arguing they don't want his ashes in their family grave.

[Russell]

How to wash your hands...

[matsuki]

fake news! That definitely wasn't warm water!

[Russell]

[Russell]

[Mike Oxlong]

[Russell]

Mike, I like the last one.

Yep, we are in this, with thousands of deaths (and likely many more), enormous economic damage, because one Chinese person wanted to eat a freaking bat!

[matsuki]

Meanwhile in China....

Nationwide "No foreigners allowed"

Foreigners won’t be allowed to enter even with valid visas and work permits, the foreign ministry said in a statement late Thursday, in what it called a “necessary and temporary” step. Diplomats aren’t included in the order, and neither are people coming to China “to engage in necessary economic, trade, scientific and technological activities, and for urgent humanitarian needs,” it said.

https://www.bloomberg.com/news/articles ... g-saturday

[kurogane]

Mike, I like the last one.

Yep, we are in this, with thousands of deaths (and likely many more), enormous economic damage, because one Chinese person wanted to eat a freaking bat!

Do we know that yet? (with reasonable evidence and certainty, etc.)???? serious question

I have a suspicion that the Tokyo 2020 symbol itself may have been the harbinger of this doom. The similarity in the shape of what should be 2 disparate phenomenon could easily have caused a brief puckered warp in the time/space schpincter and led to the inadvertent emission of an infectious miasma that the bats picked up in their merry travels.

In Other News, according to the Internet, some in the flatter parts of Canada are blaming fiction readers

Why else would they call it the Novel Coronavirus, HUH!!!!????

[matsuki]

Mike, I like the last one.

Yep, we are in this, with thousands of deaths (and likely many more), enormous economic damage, because one Chinese person wanted to eat a freaking bat!

Do we know that yet? (with reasonable evidence and certainty, etc.)???? serious question

More likely the disease transferred to someone who ate civet soup. (which is a high falutin Chinese thing)
Bats are disease factories but don't transfer directly to humans.