[Neo-Rio]

Maybe this edges out "A Knight's tale" for the top spot of worst movie ever.



Jousting to Queen?
Rock you! .... my ass

[Socratesabroad]

Au contraire, mon amie! The worst movie ever is, of course,



Showgirls

No comparison whatsoever - Paul 'Total Recall' Verhoeven shackles Kyle MacLachlan and Gina Gershon with the likes of Elizabeth Berkley....

'I'm not a stripper, I'm a dancer..."

[Steve Bildermann]

Obvious you lucky guys have never 'experienced' the worst of 'the worst' Karate flick ever made. Everyone said it sucked even the director.

Jaguar Lives!

Starring Us Karate Champion Jow Lewis (WHO?)

Some IMDB comments

Unexplainable Plot , with some extremely wooden acting and one of the most severe examples of continuity where the Jaguar fights the baddie at the end and in one scene change it changes from a pitch black night to brilliant sunshine . It would also seem that the film has some of the worst sound editing I have ever seen .

This movie is so bad cannot be graded. It seems someone made a mistake and all the cut scenes have been joined up and released. This is not a movie in any form I can recognize

Joe Lewis Fighting System

http://www.joelewiskarate.com/proshop/elite-private-lesson.asp

I have been a world champion and was named the Greatest Fighter in the History of Fighting twice. But, what I am most proud of is the work I have done as a teacher.

What Bruce Lee taught me, I will teach to you.

[DJEB]

My personal favourite is GOJIRA vs. BIOLANTE - Biolante, of course, being a giant killer rosebush.

[AlbertSiegel]

Yes, those movies are bad... let us not forget this one though:



And yes, it is based on the anime of the same name.

[kidrock12xp]

In my personal point of view, the worst movie that I've actually seen would have to be Soldier of Fortune. This movie is so pointless. You could watch the first 5 minutes and know exactly whats being shown for the rest of it. It plays the same 5 to 10 minutes sequence over and over again from different angles and points of views from the soldiers. VERY BORING.

[Caustic Saint]

That quote reminded me of another classic:



THE TURKISH STAR WARS

"The Turkish Star Wars" makes film criticism moot.

Turkish Star Wars Trailer (Quicktime)

I'll see your "The Turkish Star Wars" and raise you a "Korean Batman"



(Spotted today at the "Amusing Collection Flea Market" out at Tokyo Big Sight. No, I didn't buy it.)

[kidrock12xp]

WTF, this movie looks crazy. I gotta get it just to laugh my butt off hehe.

[AlbertSiegel]

What do you think Korean Batman would do with Cat Woman when he captures her? I'm kinda hungry....

[Kanchou]

What is Korean Batman doing with a giant anime robot?...

[ibiza]

I think you guys are forgetting Logan's Run.

[GomiGirl]

I loved Logan's Run!!

Sanctuary!!

[emperor]

check out the trailer for:

The Incredible Melting Man

http://videodetective.com/home.asp?PublishedID=37898

its hilariously bad..

[devicenull]

um, all those movies have plot... thought out plot at that, and im going to assume in0focus shots and more than 3 voices.

"Manos" The Hands of Fate is the worst ever made, sorry

[Big Booger]

GIGLI SUCKS ASS!!!



http://www.sonypictures.com/movies/gigli/


From director Martin Brest (Scent of a Woman, Midnight Run) comes Gigli, an unconventional romantic comedy starring Ben Affleck and Jennifer Lopez. When low-level hood Larry Gigli (Affleck) is given an assignment that gets him in way over his head, Ricki (Lopez), a gorgeous free spirited female enforcer is sent in to assist him. Gigli finds himself falling for the unavailable Ricki and goes to great lengths to win her affection. Yet the harder she resists him, the stronger their connection becomes.

Written and Directed by
Martin Brest

Produced by
Casey Silver
Martin Brest

Executive Producer
John Hardy

Director of Photography
Robert Elswit, ASC

Cast
Ben Affleck
Jennifer Lopez
Justin Bartha
Lainie Kazan
Missy Crider


It's so crappy I will never see it, ever!!!

[Socratesabroad]

Who, easy now kids.

Someone proferring Logan's Run as the worst movie ever? Hah, I laugh haughtily and ridicule your very existence.

Now, all of these cheap-o knock-offs have also been suggested - but (and, yes, I did read the Turkish Star Wars review) these films were literally produced in someone's backyard/local park/somewhere out of the public eye for mere fractions of what Leo DeCaprio's male escorts cost. These blatant attempts to sponge off of Hollywood should be given their due for the shameless imitation (actual film clips in some cases) plus the added local spice. Avocado sushi rolls, I give you egg, corn, tuna, and teriyaki chicken pizza.

The worst film ever is not an Attack of the Killer Tomatoes or Plan 9 from Outer Space, which were good despite their suckiness, because the people making the film knew they were making a stinker on a shoestring budget. - and still made the effort.

The worst films of all time, in my mind, remain those that had all of the funding, star talent, and time an Ed Wood could only dream about along with the potential to be something spectacular, only to piss it all away like last night's Night Train Cherry Wine.

For the worst film of all time (English), I still offer 'Showgirls' for the 'pole position' [rimshot] if you will, though there is a very, very close shadowy second...

[Cubed]

Logan's Run?

Logan's Run rocks, you dillus.

Crap films?

"Waterworld" - opening scene of him drinking his own piss. Obviously, in the future, getting freshwater by evaporating seawater has been completely lost in the mists of time ....

Now if he'd swigged from his own urea at dispersed intervals in the film and excalimed "Mmmmm! A masterpiss!" or "Mmm, urine - nature's elixir!", that would have made the film marginally better.

Come to think of it, anything with Kevin Costner in it is usually rubbish. "The Postman". Oh dear. Is there a sequel "The Radiator Engineer" coming?

Probably.

[Charles]

Oh you poor naive filmgoers. It is obvious that none of you are acquainted with the true horrors of bad filmmaking. You could not be. If you really were tainted by such knowledge, you would be falling all over yourselves to denounce the worst film that has never been made:

Come Back to the Five and Dime, Jimmy Dean, Jimmy Dean.

I'm not talking just crappy filmmaking here. I'm talking megalomanaical direction by Robert Altman, who is so blinded by his own ego that he thinks he's making a GOOD film, rather than a monumentally BAD one. Includes a cast from your deepest nightmare: Cher, Karen Black, Sandy Dennis, and Kathy Bates. And it's not just the horrific cast, this is a movie version of a play.. a ONE SCENE play that takes place in ONE ROOM. It's like being trapped in a room with depressed, suicidal, whining women for two hours, and there is no exit.

[Taro Toporific]

"Manos" The Hands of Fate is the worst ever made, sorry

Get ready for the new contender staring our own "devicenull." -->

THUNDERBIRDS ARE GO!-->
TOKYO, JAPAN: US movie director Jonathan Frakes receives a bouquet from Japanese actress Masami Nagasawa before a press conference to promote their film "Thunderbirds" in Tokyo, 21 July 2004. The movie will be shown all over Japan from 07 August.
AFP /21 July 2004

[Faded]

I'm sorry but the late 90's "Crash" has to rank up there

"people who derive sexual pleasure out of actual and recreations of car crashes". gives a whole new meaning to Autoerotica.

but you do get to see Holly Hunters breast, so.......

[Taro Toporific]

I'm sorry but the late 90's "Crash" has to rank up there
"people who derive sexual pleasure out of actual and recreations of car crashes". gives a whole new meaning to Autoerotica.

Call me a gimp gearhead but how could ya not like this?

Clad in a leather miniskirt, fish-net stockings, black lace body harness, and custom leg braces the crippled Gabrielle visit the annual auto show, which occupies the immense halls of the airport convention center. James watches appreciatively as she swings herself on her shackled legs amongst the hundreds of cars displayed on their stands. Gabrielle approaches the imposing Mercedes stand and, pivoting about on her heels, seems to take immense pleasure from these immaculate vehicles, placing her scarred hands on their paintwork, rolling her injured hips against them like an unpleasant cat.
She soon draws the attention of a young salesman who tries hard not to notice her scars and braces.

SALESMAN
Is there something here that interests
you?

GABRIELLE
The white sports model. Could you help me
into it, please? I'd like to see if I can
fit into a car designed for a normal body.

Both James and Gabrielle enjoy the salesman's discomfort as he helps her into the Mercedes sports car.
She does her best to make it difficult, deliberately snagging her leg brace clips on the soft leather of the driver's side armrest, forcing him to unhook her and to touch her deformed thighs and knees while manipulating her legs into the footwell.

Script, "Crash" (1996)
Based on the novel by J.G. Ballard
Screenplay by David Cronenberg
Produced & directed by David Cronenberg

Cast List:
James Spader: James Ballard
Holly Hunter: Dr. Helen Remington
Elias Koteas: Vaughan
Deborah Unger: Catherine Ballard
Rosanna Arquette: Gabrielle
Peter MacNeil: Seagrave

[Faded]

That must have been after I left the theater.

When I hit the scene where "Gabriella" was in bed with James Spader asking him about Elijah Kotias' scarred nipples and if his scrotum was "roughed up". At that point I figured a beer was going to be alot more entertaining then the movie.

[Mulboyne]

One man who believes Thunderbirds to be the worst film in the world is Gerry Anderson. Not a happy bunny.
Gerry Anderson: Nobody's puppet

"It is no exaggeration to say," he announces, with Sisyphean weariness, "that wherever I go, every day of the week, people are saying to me, 'How's the Thunderbirds film going, Gerry?', and I have to say that I'm not involved with it. I'm not involved with it." Got that?
...And Working Title loves Gerry Anderson just as much as he loves them. "The reality with Gerry is that he's upset with everything," declares the firm's president of marketing David Livingstone...So, might Working Title still kiss and make up with Anderson? "I'm not sure the door would still be open," reflects Livingstone, "because, frankly, he's been such a pain in the arse."

[Taro Toporific]

One man who believes Thunderbirds to be the worst film in the world is Gerry Anderson. Not a happy bunny.
Gerry Anderson: Nobody's puppet

It's a farkquing puppet show, sheesh.
Rolls-Royce refused permission for its car to be used as the FAB 1. Puppethead Anderson had a hissy-fit that the Ford Thundbird was made as substitute even though that fully-fuctional, custom car workmanship is AMAZING and best (only?) thing about the movie.

Gerry Anderson: Nobody's puppet
... Rolls-Royce refused permission for its car to be used, Working Title was obliged to trade in FAB 1, Lady Penelope's famous pink roller, for a substitute [[Thunderbird]] runabout supplied by the Ford Motor Company.
Anderson was appalled by the image on his computer screen. "I took one look and thought, if that's the kind of movie they're making, I'm out." A few months later, he says, Working Title offered him $750,000 to reconsider his position. "I'm not so wealthy that I can afford to turn that kind of money down.... it's quite important to have morals."
And Working Title loves Gerry Anderson just as much as he loves them. "The reality with Gerry is that he's upset with everything," declares the firm's president of marketing David Livingstone....
Livingstone upset Anderson with a click of his mouse. "We were on the cusp of giving him a deal as creative consultant. And then I made the mistake of mailing the picture of FAB 1," he says. "We'd had an incredible response to this 27ft pink car. All the geeks loved it - the fans of the original who have stayed with it for 40 years. But Gerry thought it was a horrible design.

I've seen the road test of this new FAB 1 on the BBC's "Top Gear" and the damn beast does 120mph: the builders are buddha!

[Mulboyne]

Sadly, Anderson comes across as a troubled man. He had an earlier interview with the same journalist (reprinted on a fan siteHere)

Gerry Anderson - MBE, father of Supermarionation - has a surprisingly equivocal relationship with the stringed instruments that made him a household name.
"It's only comparatively recently that I've taken a liking to any of the puppet shows that I've made," he explains, sitting at the boardroom table in his offices at Pinewood studios. "I always used to think that they were terrible. I didn't see much on screen but the faults. I couldn't get a puppet to pick something up, or to walk. Their mouths were like letterboxes flapping open and shut. But I got to the point where I thought I'd better stop running down these pictures, because everybody in the world except me seems to like them."

[kamome]

Script, "Crash" (1996)
Based on the novel by J.G. Ballard
Screenplay by David Cronenberg
Produced & directed by David Cronenberg

Cast List:
James Spader: James Ballard
Holly Hunter: Dr. Helen Remington
Elias Koteas: Vaughan
Deborah Unger: Catherine Ballard
Rosanna Arquette: Gabrielle
Peter MacNeil: Seagrave

Ugh. I remember seeing this movie once on late-night HBO. Horrible movie.

[AssKissinger]

Crash is a great movie. Ballard and Cronenberg, good combo. Ballard lived in a Japanese controlled concentration camp in Shanghai as a child. Anyone else read Empire of the Sun? It was made into a Spielberg movie.