Selfish bastards

[gomichild]

I didn't know about the situation at this station before that night. I actually went back into the station but there were no trains running so I couldn't get back.

[FG Lurker]

I'll just say this. I would have given you the last cab no problem. But who are we to comment on how the Japanese go about their lives. I'm getting sick of people complaining about this or that in Japan. If you don't like it, go home! I doubt if the Japanese will miss you, and you will probably get the last cab. Sounds like a win win to me haha!

Come back and talk to me after you've lived here 10 years or more.

I enjoy my life in Japan and do not have desire to leave at this time. However like any country Japan is not perfect.

To use your own words, I'm getting sick of you bitching about this when you have so little time in-country.

I think 5 years straight in Japan and having J-in-laws more than qualifies me to make comments. Get your facts straight before you accuse others of lacking experince.

I was thinking about this again now...

I think the difference between you and me is that for me Japan is now home. Yes, I was born and grew up in Canada, but I have spent over 90% of my adult life in Japan. I've lived in Osaka longer than several of my Japanese friends and I certainly know Osaka better than a lot of my Japanese friends. I also speak Japanese and have built most of my career to date here.

Considering somewhere pretty-much-permanently home rather than a place you are living "at the moment" drastically alters your viewpoint on a given situation.

[AssKissinger]

Do you watch as a mother struggles up a flight of stairs with a pram and all her baggage?

Yes. Having children was her choice. Don't wanna do the work? Don't have kids.

Do you stand up for the old man on the train?

No. I'm not sitting in the senior seats, so he can go bug the people who are.

Do you just step over the person who has fallen in the street?

Depends - did they fall in a really funny way?

Welcome to Japan. Korea has taught you well.

Good point Wanks. It does seem like Korea has fucked up his mind.

[Andocrates]

"Time in country" gee now I wonder what career path that's from?

LOL

[FG Lurker]

"Time in country" gee now I wonder what career path that's from?

LOL

Directed at me? If so I'm confused...

[American Oyaji]

It's a military expression.

[FG Lurker]

It's a military expression.

Ahh, well that explains my confusion then! Thanks AO.

[Caustic Saint]

Welcome to Japan. Korea has taught you well.

Good point Wanks. It does seem like Korea has fucked up his mind.

What? You don't think I could've been fucked up before going to Korea?

[tatsujin]

Slight omoidashite moment from me: When I first arrived in Japan I got on a series of confusing trains from Nagoya to a little sleepy town called Minamisenju, where I was due to stay for the month's holiday.

Standing outside the station at about 12.30 am, that was the roughly the scene that greeted me - a rainy unwelcoming empty street, similar to the scene in the picture.

I had no idea where my hotel was and couldn't find any indication of of which direction to go. Still, as I sat on my suitcase underneath a shop front trying to hail a taxi, I thought, Fuck, I'm finally in Japan!

Anyway, ahem, apologies for the sidenote...

stayed in minamisenju for two weeks when moving to tokyo from fukuoka. I am not easily scared but I learned very fast that this area is
1)yakuza country
2)full of scary drunken guys at day and night time (urinating everywhere )
3)a place where garbage burns in the streets ( quite rare in Japan)
never seen so many scary people in one place.

Its certainly an experience alright. It did seem like a giant suburban retirement home for drunks. If you move off the main street and go down by the shopping arcade for example, you will see probably the largest concentration of winos in the free world today! Drinking and pissing like their very lives depended on it

Strangely I didn't see much Yakuza, but then again I wouldn't know what to look for. I stayed in Juyoh hotel, ring any bells? The Koreans running the place were the very definition of FGs...

[aquamarine]

It's a military expression.

OK folks, come now. I've asked questions before using the term 'In-Country' and I was never here when in the military, just keep that in mind that it's not ALWAYS used in that form.

[Samurai_Jerk]

I think gomigirl is the type that believes in special treatment for women. She also supported the idea of a day off for menstration.

I've definitely learned not to be be chivalrous with American women I don't know. There are plenty of women that are offended by any kind of treatment that shows they are different. I met a girl from Boston who used to date a Southern guy. Down South they still teach boys to hold doors for women, pull chairs out for women at a restaurant, stand up when they leave the table, etc. --I was born in the South so I know-- She was truly offended by his behavior. I also used to know a girl who would take the door from men who help it open for her and tell them she could do it herself.

[Mels]

I think gomigirl is the type that believes in special treatment for women. She also supported the idea of a day off for menstration.

I've definitely learned not to be be chivalrous with American women I don't know. There are plenty of women that are offended by any kind of treatment that shows they are different. I met a girl from Boston who used to date a Southern guy. Down South they still teach boys to hold doors for women, pull chairs out for women at a restaurant, stand up when they leave the table, etc. --I was born in the South so I know-- She was truly offended by his behavior. I also used to know a girl who would take the door from men who help it open for her and tell them she could do it herself.

Awww...It isnt wise to categorize American woman that you dont know in this way. As you are well mannered and polite person, I am the same. I am a bit on the old fashion side as well. I dont expect anyone to, for example, to open a door for me, but if a man (or woman) does, I am always thankful. The women you describe are assholes in my book. I have seen this too and for me, it is plan rude..they are not polite and they have their heads up their ass...they are women libbers that go beyond reasonable behavior.
I can understand why you may feel this way, but a small group of American women who are idiots shouldnt be the foundation of how american women are.
Funny story here, I hang out with a group of girls. One is a 27 year old schoold teacher. Very attractive. But she will BURP LOUDLY at the dinner table. I turned to her and asked her why? She said, hey guys do it, why cant I. I then said, it doesnt matter if guys do it or not, it is plan rude for a man or woman to burp in that many at the table in public. It isnt like we are hanging out at a pub to college students etc.
So you see, some women also DONT get it.

I just hope that even if you encounter an American woman you dont know, you will still be your polite self and open the door...it may be me you run into.

[AssKissinger]

Who said I won't share a cab with a Japanese male? What country's man would you share a cab with?

[GargoyleTS]

Who said I won't share a cab with a Japanese male? What country's man would you share a cab with?

Not Greece </stereotype>

[Mels]

Samurai:
I think you have the wrong impression of Gomi.
I did not believe she is thinking women should get special treatment. I will give you one example of special treatment is:

In the Airline industry where two of my buddies are pilots.
A woman does not have to have the same flight hours as a man to get a job. That is not fair and special treatment. If a woman fails her flight training exam, she can take it over, the white male cannot. That is special treatment. The woman that gets a promotion, but her scores are not as high and she lacks flight hours over a white male. That is special treatment and not fair to the man. This is an example where equal rights has GONE WRONG. This is where affirmative action has crossed the line, this is where I lose faith in the system because it causes reverse discrimination. It no longer becomes the best qualified person who get the position, but the woman or minority. That is shitty and I hope things change.

However, For ANY woman in Gomi's shoes..who was alone in an area that was deserted. We would feel scared.....because many of us have been raised to be extra cautious when we are alone.....the preditors out there are mainly men who seek out women and children.
She was coming home from work. Sometimes things happen and we may find ourselves in a position we did not intend...and we as woman admit we are concerned for our saftey.

Someone here, I think it was Neo, said that Japan is safe and he sees a lot of J girls walking around at night? It is usually because the girls are in a group, not alone. My J family would NEVER allow my girl cousins to be out and about at night without another friend. Becase they are concerned for their saftey. I too was subjected this this by my aunts.
Japan USE to be safe years ago, but it isnt any more. Maybe safer then NYC, but hell, NYC, Washington DC, Detroit and even SF are some DANGEROUS areas for both men and women.

Anyway, sometimes it is challenging to articulate clearly what my thoughts are in writing...but I hope you get my drift.

[gomichild]

I also believe in paid paternity leave - it's not about women expecting special treatment, it's about being fair and sensible given the situation at hand.

[Samurai_Jerk]

Mels, I'm not rude to people in public but I don't go out of my way to do anything special for women like I did when I was younger. Of course my Southern upbringing means I sometimes instinctually let women go through the door first or end up holding the door for them but I've tried very hard to break myself of these habits. This is also true at work. I never offer to help female coworkers lift anything heavy for example. If they ask I will, but I would do the same if a male coworker asked. I agree with Charles --I think he's the one who said it-- that women killed chivalry.

[Mels]

Mels, I'm not rude to people in public but I don't go out of my way to do anything special for women like I did when I was younger. Of course my Southern upbringing means I sometimes instinctually let women go through the door first or end up holding the door for them but I've tried very hard to break myself of these habits. This is also true at work. I never offer to help female coworkers lift anything heavy for example. If they ask I will, but I would do the same if a male coworker asked. I agree with Charles --I think he's the one who said it-- that women killed chivalry.

Well, I am glad my dad and all my guy friends do not feel this way. Even when a woman reacts a certain way, they just shrug their shoulders and move on. But, it doesnt stop them from offering to help or open the door. I did ask a couple of friends about this one time....they told me: They treat others in the way they want their mother, sister, aunt, wife, daughter to be treated.
Personally, I think it is a LAME excuse to say women killed chivalry....I certainly have not done that and I have always been treated well.
I offer to help MEN or Women if they are lifting something.

The difference between you and me is, I offer to help regardless of the sex or the circumstance, I dont look at is a chivary. That is just me.

[Oradea]

I consider myself to be chivalrous, and would probably have given GC my cab.

This whole thread seams to have split in two.

GC, If there was a scared girl or scared boy, I would have given either my taxi, provided i was alone.
If I was with my family, then no-one would get my cab.

Also, I have never met a woman who hasn't accepted my chivalry in opening doors or whatever, I don't think I have ever offended anyone as Samurai says happened to his friend. That seems a little odd, but probably because I have never experienced that.

[Mels]

I also believe in paid paternity leave - it's not about women expecting special treatment, it's about being fair and sensible given the situation at hand.

To add to this, I believe that fathers also should get paid paternity leave to bond with their child. Too long has it been that only the mother had this time with the baby. Today, in many companies, they have finally added this to their benefits. It is a postive move foward..a child needs both mother and father.

[Mels]

I consider myself to be chivalrous, and would probably have given GC my cab.

This whole thread seams to have split in two.

GC, If there was a scared girl or scared boy, I would have given either my taxi, provided i was alone.
If I was with my family, then no-one would get my cab.

Also, I have never met a woman who hasn't accepted my chivalry in opening doors or whatever, I don't think I have ever offended anyone as Samurai says happened to his friend. That seems a little odd, but probably because I have never experienced that.

How refreshing...this sounds like my father and friends.

[sillygirl]

There's nothing as attractive as a gentleman.

[Mels]

There's nothing as attractive as a gentleman.

DITTO... and honorable.

[Mels]

Samurai:
I love the south and hope you will keep your southern beliefs and manners. Nothing wrong with how you use to be, that part of you is a great thing. Don't let a few people or experiences to change that great southern part of you. That is your unique quality.

[Pencilslave]

Japan USE to be safe years ago, but it isnt any more. Maybe safer then NYC, but hell, NYC, Washington DC, Detroit and even SF are some DANGEROUS areas for both men and women.

Since Japan isn't as safe as it used to be, what safety precautions would I need to take and what types of crime do I need to be most concerned about while visiting?

[NeoNecroNomiCron]

Since Japan isn't as safe as it used to be, what safety precautions would I need to take and what types of crime do I need to be most concerned about while visiting?

You better hide all your foetus jars, wear a chasity belt because of all the groping on trains. Never wink at a girl because she will draw pictures of you and eventualy kill you. Dont talk to any school children wearing "nevada" sweaters. Dont swim in the sea because you may be mistaken for a dolphin. Dont speak to salerary men because they will molest you while forcing you to wear a power rangers costume. Dont look at any foreigners as they are as sick as the rest of the japs here. Especialy wwatch out for kuro-jin (blacks) because they only deal drugs and white slavery. If you dont want to get aids never get a massage.

[Mels]

Japan USE to be safe years ago, but it isnt any more. Maybe safer then NYC, but hell, NYC, Washington DC, Detroit and even SF are some DANGEROUS areas for both men and women.

Since Japan isn't as safe as it used to be, what safety precautions would I need to take and what types of crime do I need to be most concerned about while visiting?

I can only share from my experience and I am sure others may have other things they do.

In general, I do think Japan is safer then most countries and city's I have visited and lived.
However, there are things I and my freinds have encountered.

If you are in Tokyo, my hang out area, it is like any other big city.

Beware of Pick Pockets especially in the crowded train stations and any crowded places. I had two friends who had their wallets lifted.
On the trains, if you are a women, there are times it is very crowded and there are sick men who may touch you in a molesting way. I always carried a bag that would cover my rear and another bag to cover my front. If the trains were that crowded, I would try to get on last so I am closer to the door so that I would only worry about one area of my body and the other area is agaisnt the door.

Be aware of the areas you visit if it is late at night. Typically, most of the problems I have encountered were because of other forgieners. There were certain areas I stayed away from...such as popular bars that were off the main roads, even if I were with a large group of friends. I have seen many fights in my day. People do get stupid when they are drunk.

If you are a woman and working and living in a big city (tokyo, osaka), make sure to have a strategy if you are working late. Many companies will have a car take you home...if not, be sure not to miss the last train....call a friend. Just do what you would normally if you are alone at night. I am always aware of my surroundings here and in Tokyo. There are sick people any where you go....muggings, assault and rape are things that do happen.

If you are from a big city, then do what you do at home.

I have had stalkers in Japan. That was scary, but I was very cautious and had people from work watch out for me for awhile.

Over all, even with a few glitches that one would have anywhere (although I never got stalkers that were american (the two guys were Japanese..one in Tokyo and one in Los Angeles who worked for a Japanese moving company)), I just did what I would do anywhere I lived.